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Snowiez

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Snowiez
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2527
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Snowiez's favorite FMLs

Today, was my boyfriend's birthday. He wanted a blowjob while playing Call of Duty 4. In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller down when he died. Into my head. FML

#3078421
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53098) - you deserved it (20752)

On 06/21/2009 at 12:16am - intimacy - by jinxofsocal (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was on the phone with my best friend who lives out of town. He was strangely quiet. Later that day I asked him why he didn't talk much. He admitted he was jacking off to the sound of my voice. FML

#2975022
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49330) - you deserved it (4180)

On 06/17/2009 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by automaticfail_00 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

#2772494
813 comments

I agree, your life sucks (113732) - you deserved it (71763)

On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I found out just how thin the walls at my new student flat are. They are so thin in fact, that I can hear the creepy guy next door say my full name over and over again very slowly whilst masturbating rigorously. FML

#2738282
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (100452) - you deserved it (4281)

On 06/09/2009 at 9:36am - intimacy - by SleepyKirsty (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML

#2722142
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79302) - you deserved it (19067)

On 06/08/2009 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by OhGeez (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I woke up to my wife talking in her sleep, "No Brandon! I don't want to have sex!" My wife won't have sex with me when she's awake OR in her dreams. FML

#2697150
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69266) - you deserved it (5381)

On 06/07/2009 at 5:49pm - intimacy - by BW (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my girlfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex. Over breakfast, she said it was the most intense, primal and mind-blowing sexual experience she ever had. Problem is, I don't remember a damned thing. FML

#2602287
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61396) - you deserved it (8829)

On 06/04/2009 at 4:10pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, there were no more seats on the bus I was taking home, which meant I had to stand. I noticed that a creepy guy sitting in front of me had a boner, so I took a few steps back. Suddenly the bus went through something like a speed bump, which caused me to fall and sit on the man's lap. FML

#2424875
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68182) - you deserved it (4892)

On 05/30/2009 at 2:52am - intimacy - by nevergoingonabusagain (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, me and my girlfriend were heading back to her place. On the way there, she was rubbing and stroking me. When we got there, I asked her mom for a congrats hug. I forgot I had a hard on from my girlfriend. She felt it. FML

#2335982
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16865) - you deserved it (61428)

On 05/27/2009 at 5:45am - intimacy - by arctic1 (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Attempting to make things a little more exciting, I said in my sexiest voice "oh yeah, harder." My boyfriend who apparently doesn't like talking dirty, pulled out and angrily said "I was trying, what more do you want?" FML

#2308066
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67605) - you deserved it (17471)

On 05/26/2009 at 12:53pm - intimacy - by alexis89 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom talked about how it's interesting how there's so many different size of penises. She also told me that since she's doing hormone therapy she's able to orgasm a LOT more. We were stuck in stop and go traffic for 3 hours. When I turned on the radio, she turned it off and talked more. FML

#2267946
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78895) - you deserved it (4353)

On 05/25/2009 at 4:54am - intimacy - by ITSnotFUNNYtoMEass (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend's dad asked me if I wanted to drive his 2008 Jaguar XKR. Excitedly, I agreed. He then spent the next hour discussing with me how masturbation is a great alternative to sex, and a great way to remain abstinent. I didn't get to drive. FML

#2235853
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50006) - you deserved it (3677)

On 05/24/2009 at 8:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, was my wedding night. We had decided to wait until marriage to have sex. When I undressed and smiled at my new wife, she burst into tears and cried, "please don't make me do this." FML

#2200863
532 comments

I agree, your life sucks (197272) - you deserved it (20886)

On 05/23/2009 at 12:44am - intimacy - by honeymoondisaster (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting at a bus stop and a guy stops in front of me and says "Oh very nice. How much?" I reply "You couldn't afford me." An old guy sitting next to me says "I bet I could" and puts his hand on my leg. I forfeited the bus and walked home in the rain. FML

#2174572
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50735) - you deserved it (22594)

On 05/22/2009 at 6:52am - intimacy - by rice_cake (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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