Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Snipbeanie

Search for a member

Snipbeanie

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 June 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 140
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Snipbeanie : Ultimate Brony, into gaming, reading and I'm generally insane ;w;

Snipbeanie's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of Snipbeanie's badges

Snipbeanie's favorite FMLs

Today, I brought my new puppy home. I saw her sniffing around, so I took her outside to do her business. She simply played in the grass for ten minutes, so I brought her in. She walked in the door, squatted, and shit. She has diarrhea. This is the fourth time today. FML

#20115908
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20248) - you deserved it (3381)

On 10/14/2012 at 12:39am - animals - by Patrick - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to initiate sex with me in my sleep. He confessed to thinking that if he did it lightly enough, I'd think I was just dreaming. FML

#20115885
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26894) - you deserved it (3839)

On 10/14/2012 at 12:24am - intimacy - by Light Sleeper - United States (Indiana)

Today, I kissed a boy for the first time in over a year. It was at drama club practice, and he quickly ended up asking the director if we could remove that scene from the play. FML

#20114767
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20586) - you deserved it (2246)

On 10/13/2012 at 9:38am - misc - by pinkfreak94 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to the surprise birthday party of an ex I still love, though I'm the one who ended things. I walked in in time to see her screaming "Yes" to her kneeling boyfriend, her parents crying and applauding, and her brothers patting him on the back. FML

#20110139
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8944) - you deserved it (44814)

On 10/10/2012 at 4:26am - love - by Toolate (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstairs. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole you didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML

#20109762
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16106) - you deserved it (60902)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by cumhole (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my friends dared me to answer the door naked for the pizza guy. I heard the doorbell but when I answered, it was the little boy from next door participating in a fundraiser. FML

#20107826
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7826) - you deserved it (34458)

On 10/08/2012 at 6:27pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I came home from a three day vacation to find my psycho ex-girlfriend in my house. Even though I broke up with her six months ago, she hasn't broken up with me. It's alright though, she says she's going to forgive me and she already moved her stuff in when I was out of town. FML

#20103889
138 comments

Today, I laughed when I shouldn't have and am probably fired. What happened? My boss asked me if birds were reptiles. I thought he was kidding. FML

#19817734
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25130) - you deserved it (3120)

On 06/20/2012 at 8:46am - work - by notanidiot - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got stuck in a three-hour traffic jam because I sneezed and missed the road I was meant to take. FML

#19700381
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22313) - you deserved it (4216)

On 05/29/2012 at 6:24pm - misc - by blocked (man) - United States

Today, my mother and I went to a meeting at my school about a camping trip the students in my grade will be going on. When the time to ask questions came, my mother raised her hand and loudly asked, "What if my child is on their period during the trip?" FML

#19281445
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31291) - you deserved it (2014)

On 03/15/2012 at 3:49am - misc - by Bebefer - United States (California)

Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML

#19174199
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35007) - you deserved it (5312)

On 02/27/2012 at 10:55am - health - by awhmaaan - United Kingdom

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him for the first time. His response was to smile and pat me on the head. FML

#18533113
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27500) - you deserved it (4430)

On 12/17/2011 at 1:49am - love - by teejayrn - United States

Today, at a nightclub, a cute girl started hitting on me. I got into it and we danced. Just as she started getting frisky with me, a guy shoved me off, smacked me to the floor with a right-hook, and shouted, "That's what you get for touching my woman." FML

#18414654
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27260) - you deserved it (4189)

On 12/02/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my husband asked me if I was really pregnant or if I was just smuggling cheeseburgers. I'm now referred to as "the hamburgler." I'm only 5 months pregnant. FML

#18393059
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27939) - you deserved it (3418)

On 11/30/2011 at 9:57am - love - by preggers - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I started my first day as a waitress. After getting my ass slapped, drinks and food spilled over me, and being tripped by a bratty kid, my tips were stolen. FML

#17764475
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33110) - you deserved it (2225)

On 09/17/2011 at 1:13pm - work - by RebekahBrooke - United States



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: