Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About Snafuusmc : USMC,Guns,and Asian women. Nuff said.
The names Levi and you somehow stumbled upon my profile. I make friends and haters everyday. So, which are you?
Where to begin? Alright well first I'll start off with some food and as a appetizer I'll go with the Asian chicks. For desert I'll have her cat. Oh and a Togo box please!
Meanwhile! a dyslexic man walks into a bra.
Revenge is never a straight line. It's a forest.And like a forest It's easy to lose your way...to get lost...to forget where you came in.
Ohayo gozaimasu! Watashi wa no namae wa Levi desu! O genki desu ka?
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he said "I love you, baby." I told him to go deeper, but instead of doing so, he decided to completely kill the mood by stopping and saying it again in a Barry White type voice. FML
Today, I received a call from the company I applied to, only to have my father pick it up and make fun of the man's accent. They won't call me back or take any of my calls, and my dad is completely unapologetic. FML
Today, I visited my new doctor, hoping that he would be able to figure out the cause of the pains I've been having for years. He told me there's nothing he can do, that half the drugs out there cause cancer anyway and that I should look into homeopathy. Great. FML
Today, while on the train to university, I realized it was my stop and quickly stood up to get off. Or I would have, if my leg hadn't gone to sleep and caused me to fall, landing face first into the crotch of the old guy in front of me. FML
Today, my roommate and I realised our freezer hasn't been working for days. This would be slightly less awful if she hadn't been storing dead rats for her pet snakes in there. Let's just say the smell is interesting. FML
Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML
Today, I've been sick with both a chest cold and a sore throat. As a result, I've also been dehydrated, causing me to have a headache. Whenever I cough, I feel like my throat is being ripped apart and my head is about to explode. FML
Friday 5 February 2016