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Smoot7

Offline (the 07/26/2015 at 6:22am) | Search for a member

Smoot7

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 3478
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Smoot7's page activity

Visits<b>funnybunny89</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 9:22pm<b>brokenjawskhan</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 1:59pm<b>91hayek</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 7:48pm<b>karlcolt45</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 6:02am

Smoot7's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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Smoot7's favorite FMLs

Today, whilst vacuuming, I stupidly decided to vacuum the bathroom drain to see what would happen. Turns out it will cause stinking septic water to get sucked into the machine and spew all over the walls, ceiling and vanity. It also causes the vacuum cleaner to stop working. FML

#21445713
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9431) - you deserved it (33133)

On 07/22/2015 at 10:32pm - misc - by sucked_in - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I heard my ten-year-old brother say, "Are hamburgers a reptile?" FML

#21441553
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21677) - you deserved it (2264)

On 07/14/2015 at 1:59pm - kids - by Andrew - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had to explain to several young children why asking the new blind girl to play hide and seek with them is inappropriate. FML

#21439546
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25564) - you deserved it (2215)

On 07/10/2015 at 12:52pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I got hit in the face by a ping-pong ball. It hit me so hard, it burst a big zit on impact. FML

#21436170
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23204) - you deserved it (2722)

On 07/04/2015 at 2:25am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, I decided I wanted to bleach my hair, so I asked my mother for help. Apparently, something went wrong, because clumps of my hair started falling out. Now I'm half blonde and half bald, and my mom is just laughing at me. FML

#21436042
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22432) - you deserved it (5811)

On 07/03/2015 at 8:54pm - misc - by notquitejuliet - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I heard my sister screaming from the basement, "Don't you hit me, you asshole!" Knowing her boyfriend was over, I ran downstairs with my baseball bat, ready to smash the fucker hitting my sister. Turns out they were just playing Mario Kart and he rammed her off the edge of a bridge. FML

#21428714
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26777) - you deserved it (3699)

On 06/19/2015 at 6:21pm - misc - by baberuth - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I woke up to the sound of 4 gunshots from downstairs. I screamed, hid under the bed in tears and called the cops. Turned out my boyfriend hadn't been murdered by a burglar like I thought - he'd found a tarantula in our living room and decided to feed it a face full of lead. FML

#21428622
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27303) - you deserved it (3164)

On 06/19/2015 at 3:00pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I walked outside to get the paper, and saw a dying bird I assumed had flown into the window. It was warm so I thought it might still be alive. I wasn't wearing my glasses though, and was trying to nurse a dog turd back to life. FML

#21420933
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25651) - you deserved it (9813)

On 06/04/2015 at 10:17pm - animals - by nerderer (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my sister and I had a fight. In her rage, she threw piles of dirty laundry at me. One of her bloody panties hit me on the face. FML

#21420551
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28863) - you deserved it (3213)

On 06/04/2015 at 1:59am - misc - by bloody hell (woman) - Philippines (Rizal)

Today, I made a nursing home resident laugh so hard that he had a heart attack. FML

#21420106
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30520) - you deserved it (2785)

On 06/03/2015 at 6:15am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I'm warning you: never spoon naked with your girlfriend after eating taco bell. The shartpocalypse just might begin in her ass and end on your stomach. FML

#21420039
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29463) - you deserved it (3954)

On 06/03/2015 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was riding my newly trained horse. I've recently been suffering from bad gas, and ended up farting so violently, it spooked my horse into bucking me off and running away. FML

#21419654
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23876) - you deserved it (4594)

On 06/02/2015 at 11:23am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, the babysitter not only clogged the toilet, they tried to unclog it with our vacuum cleaner hose. FML

#21418872
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26259) - you deserved it (1904)

On 05/31/2015 at 11:37pm - misc - by somebody (woman) - United States

Today, the phone kept ringing so I picked it up and answered. When there was no response, it took a minute to realize that I was still in bed and talking to my hand. FML

#21418531
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24771) - you deserved it (4375)

On 05/31/2015 at 11:51am - misc - by Sleepy (woman) - United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East)



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