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SmittyJA24

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SmittyJA24

3Fucked!

SmittyJA24SmittyJA24
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 9921
  • Number of comments : 386
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 7 posted

About SmittyJA24 : Retired football player; now I play golf, smoke cigars, drink fine whisky, skinny-dip in the Caribbean and enjoy life.

SmittyJA24's page activity

Visits<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 11:14am<b>killigan</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:14am<b>LiteralxShit</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 5:30am<b>Eivana</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 11:30am<b>Jax_Ashnarr</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 10:59am<b>psychopolarbear</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 6:25pm<b>VeryMuchDutch</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 5:06pm<b>sevenwondersx</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 1:26pm<b>AlvvaysRedPilots</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 1:19pm<b>SundayNightSix</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 10:39am<b>plum_lovin</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 5:29pm<b>BigL99</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 3:45pm<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 3:44pm<b>MrsPegg</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 12:12pm<b>LyonDetreny</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 8:49am<b>blade9502</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 9:43am<b>joliexoxo</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 5:53pm<b>lauralabia3</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 5:47pm

Fucked!<b>Eivana</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 5:30pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 6:05am<b>TypoFairy</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 5:46am

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

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SmittyJA24's favorite FMLs

Today, I spent an hour trying to sleep before work, but I couldn't because my two dogs wouldn't stop barking. Completely pissed off, I finally went and told the little fuck nuggets to shut the shit up. I was then immediately knocked unconscious by the burglar in my house. FML

Today, after nearly 2 years, my now ex-girlfriend decided she was ready to have sex. Specifically, sex with my dad. FML

#21459616
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26130) - you deserved it (1568)

On 08/23/2015 at 9:45am - love - by pontwa (man) - Australia

Today, I tried to vacuum to surprise my mom with a clean house. The vacuum started shorting out, sparked, and then burst into flames mid living room. FML

#21456542
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24164) - you deserved it (1867)

On 08/16/2015 at 12:10am - misc - by fire starter - United States (California)

Today, my car went missing. My sister constantly asks to borrow it, so I called her and asked if she had it. She swore blind that she didn't, so I called the cops and reported it stolen. They soon caught her driving the stolen vehicle. She blames me and is now telling everyone I set her up to be arrested. FML

#21455905
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28215) - you deserved it (1639)

On 08/14/2015 at 6:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ukraine (Donets'ka Oblast')

Today, I approached a hot female security guard and attempted to compliment her new tattoos. Instead of saying, "Nice tats", I ended up saying, "Nice tits". My HR meeting is tomorrow morning. FML

#21455888
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21962) - you deserved it (8711)

On 08/14/2015 at 5:35am - work - by babbling idiot - Canada

Today, my mom got angry that I wasn't responding to her texts. I couldn't because I was in the dentist's chair. She'd dropped me off, and after returning from errands, sent the text from the waiting room. FML

#21455023
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21609) - you deserved it (1414)

On 08/12/2015 at 12:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I wanted to buy a pack of cigarettes. My wife, who didn't want me to get them, decided it would be a good idea to jump on the hood of the car while I was driving off. She hit the car and fell off. My neighbor saw this. Neither her nor the cops believe me when I say I didn't hit her. FML

#21449719
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23539) - you deserved it (4098)

On 07/30/2015 at 10:06pm - misc - by Just wanted a cigarette (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I waited 45 minutes at the Apple Store for my grandpa to very loudly ask why PornHub wasn't loading on his computer. FML

#21448024
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26258) - you deserved it (1885)

On 07/27/2015 at 12:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's job to surprise her for lunch, her manager said she hasn't worked on a Saturday in two months. FML

#21446986
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28001) - you deserved it (1735)

On 07/25/2015 at 11:51am - love - by WhoLikesPie (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while working security at my job, for the second time, a man with Down's Syndrome entered the store, went to one of the demo computers, opened YouTube, pulled up a video of oiled women wrestling and jerked off. There is no protocol in the handbook for how to deal with this scenario. FML

Today, I found out my mom recently stopped taking her medication. I came home to find she'd shot my dog because she thought he was possessed by the devil. FML

#21442016
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38908) - you deserved it (1960)

On 07/15/2015 at 11:40am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, after nearly two months of working at my new job, one of my co-workers finally explained to me that the list of tasks that our boss gives me every day are actually HER duties, and as I complete them, she just sits in her office and watches Netflix. FML

#21441743
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26919) - you deserved it (1932)

On 07/14/2015 at 9:04pm - work - by ineedaraise (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad got so drunk that I had to drive him home. He kept yelling at me to not speed, saying I was going too fast and that there were too many bumps on the road. I hadn't even started the car yet. FML

Today, I caught my mother-in-law trying to plant a GPS tracker on my car. FML

#21428876
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26705) - you deserved it (1783)

On 06/20/2015 at 1:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, from across the parking lot, I saw a woman break into my car and steal my "Handicapped parking" placard. Guess why I couldn't stop her. FML

#21427634
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34907) - you deserved it (1814)

On 06/17/2015 at 3:18pm - misc - by hobbled - United States



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