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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Smashly_Ashly

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Smashly_Ashly
  • Town/Country : US
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Saturday 4 June 1988 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 253
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Smashly_Ashly's favorite FMLs

Today, at work we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML

#6043300 (40)

I agree, your life sucks (9418) - you deserved it (39772)

On 10/28/2009 at 6:29pm - work - by R (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, while meeting guys from my dad's work, they told him what a pretty daughter he had, to which he responded "Nah, it's just shit-loads of makeup." FML

#5857727 (116)

I agree, your life sucks (25199) - you deserved it (4641)

On 10/16/2009 at 10:04pm - misc - by SheWentCrayola (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got flowers at work. I was excited until I saw they were from my good friend saying, "Sorry for sleeping with your boyfriend!" FML

#5446240 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (35910) - you deserved it (1644)

On 09/24/2009 at 12:16pm - love - by Tally (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boss fired me because a coworker had seen me reading magazines on the job. That same coworker was the one who offered me the magazine. FML

#5129906 (68)

I agree, your life sucks (29797) - you deserved it (4826)

On 09/08/2009 at 4:48pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I came home early from business trip in Paris, I bought an engagement ring. I was going to take my girlfriend of 2 years out and propose to her. I sneak into my house as a surprise and she's having it off with another man. Now I have a ring that I can only return in France. FML

#4431065 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (46397) - you deserved it (2421)

On 08/10/2009 at 4:47pm - love - by theboy6494 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I came home at noon from a long night out. I was surprised to see a woman I didn't recognize standing in my living room in a brown dress and heels. As I walked up to the door and knocked to be let in, the woman whipped around and I figured out who it was. My dad. FML

#4276253 (161)

I agree, your life sucks (41683) - you deserved it (1998)

On 08/04/2009 at 4:40am - misc - by superfiedman (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I showed by ID to get into a bar and the bouncer kept it because he said it wasn't me. It was. Apparently I've gained so much weight I am unrecognizable. FML

#4125709 (61)

I agree, your life sucks (28760) - you deserved it (9983)

On 07/29/2009 at 1:53am - misc - by jcesom - United States (West Virginia)

Today, after buying the plane ticket to Glendale, CA to visit 17 year old Courtney who I met on a dating website, she called me for the first time to say that she was actually 19 year old Seth from Atlanta, GA. FML

#2903114 (281)

I agree, your life sucks (10143) - you deserved it (64843)

On 06/15/2009 at 1:42am - love - by gabe8 (man) - Mexico (Nuevo Leon)

Today, my adorable 8 year old son told me he no longer wanted me to pick him up from school. When I asked why he said. "I told everyone at school my mommy is pretty... and I don't want people to know I lied". FML

#2876647 (186)

I agree, your life sucks (65806) - you deserved it (2676)

On 06/14/2009 at 1:42am - kids - by andthatshowitgoes (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was kicked out of my parents house. I was sleeping in my truck bed because I had nowhere to go. I awoke to a "beep beep beep" noise. I was being towed while sleeping in the truck bed. FML

#2183304 (56)

I agree, your life sucks (35363) - you deserved it (4051)

On 05/22/2009 at 4:08pm - misc - by tootles (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was waiting in the car while my mom went into a store to get beer. A few minutes later, some random guy was knocking on my window telling me to open the door. I started cursing him out, thinking I was getting attacked. Turns out he worked there and was putting the beer in the car. FML

#2010673 (97)

I agree, your life sucks (9260) - you deserved it (36176)

On 05/17/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by Kerrilyn (woman) - United States

Today, my best friend got a new boyfriend. She asked him what he wanted for his upcoming birthday, and he said he just wanted to hang out with her and watch a movie or two. I thought it was sweet, so I asked my boyfriend what he would like for his upcoming birthday. He said a blow job. FML

#1955875 (305)

I agree, your life sucks (19055) - you deserved it (31693)

On 05/15/2009 at 1:44am - intimacy - by badboyfriends (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boss in my police dept. told me to start enforcing the "no bikes on sidewalks" law which we usually ignore. I pulled up behind the first person I saw riding a bike on a sidewalk and flashed my lights. It turned out to be a boy with down syndrome who was so upset he cried and peed. FML

#1873623 (269)

I agree, your life sucks (57490) - you deserved it (9162)

On 05/12/2009 at 2:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend got the breast implants she's been wanting for the last 5 years. When I went to pick her up at the hospital she said, "Maybe I can find a guy with a real job now!" I paid for her fake tits. FML

#913985 (182)

I agree, your life sucks (51573) - you deserved it (14283)

On 04/11/2009 at 11:47am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I decided to play a joke on my boyfriend and planned to pretend that I found a thong in his gym bag. When he came home, I "confronted" him. After struggling through putting on my best face, he, unexpectedly confessed: "Look, babe, I'm sorry. It meant nothing." FML

#556029 (253)

I agree, your life sucks (41883) - you deserved it (66221)

On 03/23/2009 at 4:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)