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Smasher39

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Smasher39

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 31 July 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1140
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Smasher39's page activity

Visits<b>karmachameeleon</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 7:45am<b>jadeluv</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 1:02am<b>Catkam623</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 9:19am<b>Jiplo</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 6:24pm<b>Alwaysontherun</b> - the 06/08/2013 at 11:09pm<b>XxEmiMeowxX</b> - the 06/08/2013 at 10:41pm

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Smasher39's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss made me some tortellini for lunch. As I was happily eating it, he started to give me a massage, while talking to his friends in Greek. He told me that he said "She's my #1 cashier." Turns out, what he really said was "See, if you feed them well, they let you touch them." FML

#8576368
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26827) - you deserved it (5247)

On 02/23/2010 at 12:17am - work - by meaganlea (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was sitting down in a store when a stroller stopped by me. While the parents were fixing the strap, the baby looked at me, gasped, looked at me again, gasped, and then screamed. Ten minutes later, another baby looked at me and screamed. My face scares babies. FML

#8488357
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29384) - you deserved it (3630)

On 02/20/2010 at 7:03pm - kids - by Scaryman (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my girlfriend of a couple of months texted me that she was very sad because her puppy had just passed away. Feeling sorry for her, I bought her another puppy of the same breed. I wrapped it in a blanket and placed it on the passenger seat and went to pick her up from school. She sat on it. FML

#8099753
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29909) - you deserved it (7619)

On 02/10/2010 at 7:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend of a couple of months texted me that she was very sad because her puppy had just passed away. Feeling sorry for her, I bought her another puppy of the same breed. I wrapped it in a blanket and placed it on the passenger seat and went to pick her up from school. She sat on it. FML

#8099753
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29909) - you deserved it (7619)

On 02/10/2010 at 7:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my maid washed my PS3. Yes, with soap and water. FML

Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His mother, seconds upon meeting me, gave me a hug, smiled at me, and said: "It's so nice to finally meet you! All I ever hear is 'Emma this', and 'Emma that', 'I love Emma!'. He never stops talking about you!" My name's not Emma. FML

#7306926
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41275) - you deserved it (2208)

On 01/12/2010 at 8:39pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was on a long-haul plane journey home from my holiday. After 5 hours, I decided to stretch my arms whilst watching a movie. Little did I know that a little girl was approaching, running down the aisle as my arm stretched out. I accidentally clothes-lined a little 9 year old girl. FML

#7203649
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26566) - you deserved it (3510)

On 01/07/2010 at 7:25pm - misc - by James4929 (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML

#6712384
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13897) - you deserved it (34969)

On 12/11/2009 at 7:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I wrote a note for my crush of 2 years, expressing all my feelings for him signed it as "Forever your lover" then I slipped it into his locker. Later that day, he walked back up to me, tossed the note at me and said "You know I recognize your handwriting, right?" FML

#4865641
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38758) - you deserved it (26676)

On 08/27/2009 at 7:00pm - love - by fmynote (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I finished my internship working in a government lab. I got paid $4000 for the summer. I was talking to my cousin, who said that when he worked as a carnie last summer he made $8000. I get paid half as much for doing research as a carnie does for serving people sno-cones. FML

#4241415
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34279) - you deserved it (5090)

On 08/02/2009 at 10:40pm - money - by arghhh (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was taking a shower and I saw a new body wash that said "radiance ribbons." That sounded a little effeminate, but it smelled manly enough and the only alternative was normal soap, so I used it. Just now, I stepped out into the sun and found out what "radiance ribbons" means. I sparkle. FML

#3639578
460 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59064) - you deserved it (30746)

On 07/10/2009 at 1:03pm - misc - by takinabreak (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was taking a shower and I saw a new body wash that said "radiance ribbons." That sounded a little effeminate, but it smelled manly enough and the only alternative was normal soap, so I used it. Just now, I stepped out into the sun and found out what "radiance ribbons" means. I sparkle. FML

#3639578
460 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59064) - you deserved it (30746)

On 07/10/2009 at 1:03pm - misc - by takinabreak (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my friend told me that semen was inflammable. Later at night I jacked off into a sock and then, excitedly, tried to lit the sock on fire. Turns out, semen is very much not inflammable. Naked, I shook my sock in the air so it would extinguish while my semen splashed out all over my room. FML

#3262847
374 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8941) - you deserved it (115134)

On 06/27/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by notinflammable (man) - United States (Rhode Island)



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