Smartdumbblonde

Search for a member

Offline (the 09/10/2015 at 7:34pm)

Smartdumbblonde

11Fucked!

SmartdumbblondeSmartdumbblonde
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 2 June 1999 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7041
  • Number of comments : 52
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Smartdumbblonde : o hi I'm Amanda 🌚 I'm just your average teen who's glued to her phone screen. Just someone who sits around her room, listening to too loud music, or watching supernatural. I used to be optimistic, but society is making me pessimistic. Sometimes I try to be poetic, writing stories, and even poetry. Too lame to be rad, but too rad to be lame. Instagram: @self_destructiive
wanna talk? kik: i_lovePierceTheVeil . Pip pip ta do da lee do, run along now and remember Cockadoodledo the cow says moo and that is all.

Smartdumbblonde's page activity

Visits<b>lutessiarose</b> - the 10/25/2016 at 8:08pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 11:09pm<b>200pap</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 4:52pm<b>ActuallyCrazy</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 2:07pm<b>Mons</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 10:25pm<b>NAH2000</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 5:52pm<b>chr1sF</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 6:15pm<b>Anti_Sora</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 1:49pm<b>ZeroDark30</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 1:55am<b>idkwyatt</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 11:44pm<b>majoroftheair</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 11:41pm<b>SixxAM</b> - the 10/05/2015 at 4:34am<b>gronkmonsta87</b> - the 09/13/2015 at 9:37pm<b>karlcolt45</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 9:40pm<b>prodigy57271</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 8:49pm<b>george00</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 12:13pm<b>moron011</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 10:25pm<b>pred8885</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 11:34am

Fucked!<b>NAH2000</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 8:27pm<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 4:37am<b>marshm610</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 12:39am<b>somethingstupd</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 3:47am<b>imkool136</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 9:49am<b>moron011</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 4:04am<b>naw</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 11:07pm<b>nana_star</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 3:51pm<b>Epickitty58</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 5:22pm<b>zack1717</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 4:44am<b>Hunter4413</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 3:36am

Smartdumbblonde's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Smartdumbblonde's badges

Smartdumbblonde's favorite FMLs

Today, I was getting to second base with a really hot guy, but I couldn't stop laughing when he said my boobs were "soft like cake." He got so embarrassed that he lost his boner. FML

by weirdthingtosay / 11/21/2014 at 4:56am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML

by Anonymous / 11/20/2014 at 11:35am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because of the scratch marks on my back. I didn't have the nerve to tell her I tried to shower with the cat. FML

by Anonymous / 11/17/2014 at 7:56pm / United States (Indiana) / Love

Today, I got home and found my wife cuddling with the dog and our new kitten. Both the cat and my wife hissed at me when I tried to join in. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2014 at 9:14pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, as my kitten was sleeping on my lap, my boyfriend crept up on us and yelled, "BOO!" to make me jump. I wasn't scared, but the cat was. He tensed up and jumped to the floor. He also apparently had the runny shits, spraying me and the couch on his way down. FML

by nenette / 11/12/2014 at 5:50pm / France / Animals

Today, my dad got so drunk that he forgot my name. He started calling me "It". FML

by ItGirl / 11/08/2014 at 9:36pm / Sweden (Sodermanlands Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML

by notsofriendly / 11/06/2014 at 3:15pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my mentally-unhinged mother reached a new level of psycho - she threw a tantrum and raged at my father, accusing him of cheating on her with our cat. FML

by CatLover / 11/06/2014 at 1:30pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

by jay-frey96 / 11/02/2014 at 10:36am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boss asked about the mass of deep scratches on my arm. I lied and told him it happened while I was trying to save my cat from a tree. Truth is, my cat is a sadistic asshole who stalks me and mauls me whenever he can. FML

by thewrittenrebel / 10/28/2014 at 3:40am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Animals

Today, I was being interviewed for a grant over the phone. When asked why I wanted to go to school to be an OB nursing assistant, I panicked and yelled, "BECAUSE VAGINAS ARE FASCINATING!" into the receiver. FML

by lady parts / 10/27/2014 at 7:05pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, my little sister decided it would be funny to hide in the washroom closet while I was taking a piss. I wasn't pissing, I was wanking. FML

by John / 10/20/2014 at 8:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I laughed at my grandma's chihuahua poodle mix, as it barked at me entering the house. "What are you going to do, nibble me to death?" is apparently enough to make it jump and bite me. I needed five stitches. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2014 at 7:05pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend jerking off to what I thought was porn on his phone. He was actually beating it to Siri's voice. FML

by fizzie101 / 10/18/2014 at 5:43pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I learned that if you give a squirrel a cookie, he'll climb up your pants in search of more cookies. FML

by MegasaurusRex89 / 10/17/2014 at 8:04pm / United States (California) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.