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Smartdumbblonde

Offline (the 02/25/2015 at 1:05pm) | Search for a member

Smartdumbblonde

2Liked!

SmartdumbblondeSmartdumbblonde
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 June 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3412
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Smartdumbblonde : Hey stalker! ;D I like watching YouTube, listening to music, and writing poems and stuff. I am an antisocial kitteh who loves bands ^ω^. I love bands like ptv, sws, bvb, bmth, om&m, Chelsea grin, Hollywood undead, suicide silence, and other bands like them. My kik is i_lovePierceTheVeil and my snapchat is ayeitsamandaaaa if you wanna talk, or you can message me, I just won't reply back as quickly. I have Instagram ( bringmethe_tacos__andbands_ & self_destructiive__ ) so you can follow me if ya wanna. Pip pip ta do da lee do run along now and remember Cockadoodledo the cow says moo and that is all

Smartdumbblonde's page activity

Visits<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 10:13pm<b>Hunter4413</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 5:10pm<b>adrianvons</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 5:38am<b>zack1717</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 10:44pm<b>BecauseIAmBatman</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 4:13am<b>fatiezzhm</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 10:54am<b>hasanjk</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 3:41am<b>Apretendbiscuit</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 6:10pm<b>Soviet_American</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 10:23pm<b>Darkcamzy</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 7:42pm<b>mazdatuner09</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 7:11pm<b>Arni792</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 11:09pm<b>Ari3l</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 6:56pm<b>skeletcn</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 11:43pm<b>GrinchFu1</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 11:40pm<b>mhb210</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 11:39am<b>martini47</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 10:33am<b>vreid</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 9:31pm

Liked!<b>zack1717</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 4:44am<b>Hunter4413</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 3:36am

Smartdumbblonde's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Smartdumbblonde's badges

Smartdumbblonde's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom paid me a surprise visit me at my university dorm. She ended up rifling through my stuff and started to pull out a box from on top of my wardrobe. Before I could stop her, it slipped and fell. Today's forecast: 100% chance of dildo rain. FML

#21338507
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31778) - you deserved it (4515)

On 01/16/2015 at 8:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

Today, I finally met my long-distance boyfriend of three years for the first time in person. After an amazing dinner and movie date, we went back to his house, only for him to dump me half an hour later. Not because I wouldn't have sex with him. No, his cat doesn't like me. FML

#21332217
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30875) - you deserved it (7405)

On 01/06/2015 at 7:32pm - animals - by dragonfyre73 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML

#21329462
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33997) - you deserved it (6793)

On 01/02/2015 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by I'll Make You FartCum (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was brushing my teeth. When it came time for me to spit, I absentmindedly opened the bathroom drawer and spat in there instead of in the sink. FML

#21328982
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24626) - you deserved it (11233)

On 01/01/2015 at 10:38pm - misc - by 30000 - United States (California)

Today, my dad has discovered selfies and my mom has discovered taking pictures of food. Now I'm at a restaurant, suffering through it all and not being able to eat anything until my mom has taken pictures of it. FML

#21324090
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27259) - you deserved it (2174)

On 12/25/2014 at 4:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I witnessed my very overweight cat trying to jump over my fence, only to shit himself half way up, and then land in it. FML

Today, while hanging out with this guy I'm interested in, we turned and made eye contact. We were face to face and I thought he was finally going to kiss me. He decided to lick my face from chin to forehead instead. FML

#21320716
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31855) - you deserved it (4158)

On 12/20/2014 at 2:33am - love - by qyx3lmnop24 - United States (California)

Today, after six long, hard years of involuntary celibacy, I was finally about to get laid. Except it was just a dream, and in it my mom stormed in just as things got heated, called me a useless cunt, and told me to go do my chores. I guess my brain forgot I moved out years ago. FML

#21320480
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31649) - you deserved it (3995)

On 12/19/2014 at 6:14pm - intimacy - by giantblueballsthesizeofjohnnysinscock (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I woke up to the lovely sounds of goats having escaped their pen and climbed onto the roof. Again. FML

Today, my cat let out the biggest moan I have ever heard, while we were both in the living room. My dad heard and accused me of watching porn. FML

#21317874
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31851) - you deserved it (2633)

On 12/15/2014 at 11:07am - animals - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, as I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, she started doing stupidly fake moaning, which then went really high-pitched like a little girl's, killing my hard-on. She says she thought that because I'm Japanese-American, I'd only be able to cum if she copied "those Japanese pornstars". FML

#21317298
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36907) - you deserved it (3751)

On 12/14/2014 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by dating a moron (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I drove over an hour to my grandma's house for her birthday party. When she answered the door, her eyes went wide and she said angrily "No, not you!" and slammed the door shut in my face. FML

#21306195
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29540) - you deserved it (2396)

On 11/26/2014 at 1:13pm - misc - by unwanted (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was studying for my Spanish midterm nonstop. After I closed my book, I was so tired that I thought that my cat was asking me questions in Spanish. FML

#21303629
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28512) - you deserved it (3270)

On 11/21/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Studying is for crazy people. - United States (California)

Today, I was getting to second base with a really hot guy, but I couldn't stop laughing when he said my boobs were "soft like cake." He got so embarrassed that he lost his boner. FML

#21303170
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33122) - you deserved it (9145)

On 11/21/2014 at 4:56am - intimacy - by weirdthingtosay (woman) - United States (Washington)



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