About Smartdumbblonde : I know im beautiful, now stop staring. I hope you have fun stalking me :D. I can be bitchy if I want/need to. I am probably the most random person ever! I am very outgoing, but I am shy when you first meet me. Some things I like to do for fun is writing stories, hanging out with friends, doing my hair and makeup for no reason, taking pictures of myself and stuff like that. When I get older, I hope to be a model and an actress. If you wanna message me, you can or you can kik me, at: ayeitsamandaaa. Whatever floats your goat.
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Today, I went to a bar for some drinks. A guy looked me up and down, gave me a suggestive smile, then asked for my name and number. I'd have been a little less creeped out if he hadn't been standing beside me at the urinal the whole time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38806) - you deserved it (3032) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 06/15/2013 at 6:24pm - love - by Sovekipisse (man) - France (Pays de la Loire)
Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he discovered that if he hits a certain area just right, my leg starts shaking like a dog. Now he won't stop patting my head and saying, "Who's a good girl?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (40854) - you deserved it (6162)
On 06/15/2013 at 4:26pm - intimacy - by woof woof?? (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was on the toilet when my cat came in and jumped up on the sink. Apparently my lap looked like a comfier seat, so she jumped onto it. She misjudged the distance, but luckily caught herself by sliding to a stop, with her claws in my bare thighs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33069) - you deserved it (3612)
On 06/15/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by ouch - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I walked into the living room, only to find my brother wanking off to an episode of My Little Pony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43884) - you deserved it (4171)
On 06/14/2013 at 6:29pm - intimacy - by bestiality, not even once (woman) - Ireland (Waterford)
Today, I ordered some burgers at a fast food joint. When I said, "No lettuce," the cashier looked dumbfounded and asked, "What's that?" I literally had to say, "The green stuff" before she got it. I'm losing hope. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43704) - you deserved it (2763)
On 06/13/2013 at 6:12pm - misc - by thatisfuckedup - United Kingdom
Today, a bug buzzed into my ear. In response, I punched myself in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32324) - you deserved it (23961)
On 06/13/2013 at 12:22am - misc - by sugarysofalof - United States (Colorado)
Today, my boyfriend was extremely nervous to meet my parents but I made him do it anyway. One of the first things out of his mouth was, "I'm glad you had sex." When they gave him a look of shock, he added, "You know, when you made your daughter! She's awesome!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (49417) - you deserved it (8234)
On 06/11/2013 at 2:46pm - love - by lsababy (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (41072) - you deserved it (50963)
On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML
I agree, your life sucks (54861) - you deserved it (4109)
On 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm - kids - by life insurance for 1 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55684) - you deserved it (11980)
On 05/28/2013 at 12:37pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was out on a family walk, when I overheard two women talking to each other. One of them was wondering how a kid with such good looking parents and grandparents could be so ugly. That kid is my daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36764) - you deserved it (2875)
On 05/22/2013 at 12:47pm - kids - by Kittykat900 (woman) - United Kingdom (York)
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39652) - you deserved it (3950)
On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, while packing for a trip, my mom bumped my bag and it started to vibrate. She flew into a huge rage calling me all sorts of colourful names, thinking it was a sex toy. It was my tooth brush. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57681) - you deserved it (3758)
On 05/08/2013 at 10:44am - intimacy - by oops - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML
I agree, your life sucks (59916) - you deserved it (8333)
On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, a family of geese nested outside my halls of residence. They have started attacking everyone who tries to get in or out of the building. I'm basically being placed under house arrest by birds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37039) - you deserved it (2871)
On 04/29/2013 at 12:14pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (York)
Monday 17 June 2013
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