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SlytherinSyd

Offline (yesterday at 4:06am) | Search for a member

SlytherinSyd

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 23 February 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3110
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About SlytherinSyd : hey! I'm just here for the laughs. (:

SlytherinSyd's page activity

Visits<b>bunkiii</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 9:25pm<b>ShadowOfHope</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 5:21am<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 8:13pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 11:51am<b>spatula232</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 7:30am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 6:46pm<b>Jenn_Ohio</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 2:04pm<b>Metashock</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 9:17pm<b>porter1313</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 1:15am<b>Loomunati</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 10:24am<b>fergiefergs</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 10:33am<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 9:30pm<b>alliane</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 1:44am<b>kelsorg</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 10:02pm<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 11:49am<b>driftlobster</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 5:38am<b>jonnyscash</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 3:37pm<b>TheChelseaSays</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 4:54am

Fucked!<b>ShadowOfHope</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 11:21am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 5:51pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 12:45am

SlytherinSyd's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of SlytherinSyd's badges

SlytherinSyd's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling iron. FML

#20667250
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73576) - you deserved it (6178)

On 05/16/2013 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by need € for new iron (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I lost my patience and asked the deadbeat I loaned money to last year to please pay up. His response: "Blow me." No thanks, dad. FML

#20661189
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48695) - you deserved it (5425)

On 05/13/2013 at 5:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

#20660939
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79871) - you deserved it (5510)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

#20642182
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51347) - you deserved it (4447)

On 05/05/2013 at 12:14am - work - by ADickySituation - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

#20640565
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70097) - you deserved it (10294)

On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was getting ready, when I heard my dad in the shower. He was singing along to the song "The Wheel in the Sky" by Journey. Except he'd changed the lyrics and was singing, "The dick on this guy needs a rubbin'." It turns out my mom was in the shower with him. FML

#20634724
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64308) - you deserved it (5228)

On 05/01/2013 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, for a laugh, I put vanilla yogurt into a mayonnaise jar and went to the mall to eat it with a spoon. Too bad that someone called mall security on me for disturbing the peace. They shoved me into a back room and grilled me about what was in the jar. FML

#20632537
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42679) - you deserved it (18654)

On 04/30/2013 at 11:09am - misc - by longsock123 - United States (California)

Today, my sister was crying to me about how her boyfriend never showed up for their date. He's done this many times before, so I suggested the fact that maybe he'd just ditched her. She said that was ridiculous, because "he's Canadian" and according to her, "they don't lie." FML

#20621115
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44657) - you deserved it (4984)

On 04/25/2013 at 4:36pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out that my roommate has a masturbation problem; the problem is that he does it in my bed. FML

#20618791
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59645) - you deserved it (4443)

On 04/24/2013 at 5:15pm - intimacy - by awkward O_o - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML

#20618445
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77752) - you deserved it (9361)

On 04/24/2013 at 2:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML

#20613218
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50501) - you deserved it (8173)

On 04/22/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32881) - you deserved it (113056)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, it's my only day off work in a while. I told my boss I'd be available via phone in case of emergencies. So far I've been called three times: To ask how the fax works, to let me know it's a slow day, and to ask me where the letter R is on a keyboard. FML

#20604416
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48549) - you deserved it (5668)

On 04/19/2013 at 6:17am - work - by Anonymous - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML

#20598610
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58642) - you deserved it (5694)

On 04/17/2013 at 2:14am - love - by rawdoglyfe69 - United States (Montana)

Today, at the exact moment that I leaned over to show my dad a picture on my phone, my boyfriend texted me: "I'm no weather man, but you can expect a few inches tonight." FML

#20598564
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66095) - you deserved it (12693)

On 04/17/2013 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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