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SlytherinSyd

Offline (the 08/29/2015 at 5:47am) | Search for a member

SlytherinSyd

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 23 February 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3374
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About SlytherinSyd : hey! I'm just here for the laughs. (:

SlytherinSyd's page activity

Visits<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 7:56pm<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 3:09am<b>thinblue32</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 6:46pm<b>Cameron05233250</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 2:56am<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 10:38pm<b>hantu69</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 6:25pm<b>bunkiii</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 9:25pm<b>ShadowOfHope</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 5:21am<b>spatula232</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 7:30am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 6:46pm<b>Jenn_Ohio</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 2:04pm<b>Metashock</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 9:17pm<b>porter1313</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 1:15am<b>Loomunati</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 10:24am<b>fergiefergs</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 10:33am<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 9:30pm<b>alliane</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 1:44am<b>kelsorg</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 10:02pm

Fucked!<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 5:02am<b>ShadowOfHope</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 11:21am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 5:51pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 12:45am

SlytherinSyd's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of SlytherinSyd's badges

SlytherinSyd's favorite FMLs

Today, I wore a bikini to the lake with my parents. I didn't know that my back was covered in bruises, and ended up having to awkwardly explain to my parents that I am not in an abusive relationship; the bruises came from the sex I had last night. FML

#20822120
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54721) - you deserved it (15476)

On 08/05/2013 at 1:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML

#20810724
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60161) - you deserved it (9297)

On 07/29/2013 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by JustSomeGuy - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. When I didn't get off right away, he asked what he was doing wrong. I told him he was doing fine, but instead of focusing only on my vagina, he might want to pay attention to my clitoris as well. His response? "What's a clitoris?" FML

#20809292
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65362) - you deserved it (9641)

On 07/29/2013 at 3:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he was going to buy me a "magic wand". Being a Harry Potter fanatic, I assumed he meant a replica wand. It turns out he actually meant a Magic Wand vibrator. I was more excited about the HP wand. FML

#20758994
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45015) - you deserved it (8881)

On 07/01/2013 at 11:37pm - intimacy - by whorecrux (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I ran out of clean boxers. Thinking nobody would find out, I snatched a pair of my wife's panties. Later, we had a cook out for my birthday, where some of my old pals thought it would be funny to pants me. FML

#20721670
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37723) - you deserved it (68520)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:39pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, after years of faking pleasure with my boyfriend, I visited the gynaecologist. As soon as she touched my privates I instinctively let out a fake moan. FML

#20720590
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37129) - you deserved it (75040)

On 06/11/2013 at 11:06pm - intimacy - by instinct (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58506) - you deserved it (67403)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32385) - you deserved it (68745)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, my brother looked me dead in the eyes and said his life goal is to find a way to jizz on everyone in the world. I'm scared. FML

#20703677
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59116) - you deserved it (5342)

On 06/03/2013 at 4:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Poland (Kujawsko-Pomorskie)

Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML

#20701323
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69800) - you deserved it (4272)

On 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I fainted. Instead of stopping to help, some guy stopped to draw a penis on my forehead. The EMT laughed. FML

#20692945
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48664) - you deserved it (3646)

On 05/29/2013 at 11:21am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was sending intimate pictures to my girlfriend and accidentally sent one to my best friend. He sent me one back. FML

#20690661
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59163) - you deserved it (34462)

On 05/28/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by Abrams52 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, a girl at my tanning salon was ranting about how expensive it was and how she wished there was a cheaper way to get a tan. I joked, "Like from the sun?" She angrily called me a "sassy bitch", screamed to my boss about me, and then threatened to sue us when he kicked her out. FML

#20689621
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46223) - you deserved it (4056)

On 05/27/2013 at 4:18pm - work - by fuck you retail (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a man asked about fishing in the river which flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML

#20688045
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46403) - you deserved it (7882)

On 05/26/2013 at 8:40pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, a package was delivered to my house, addressed to me, clearly marked "sexual health products". Inside were condoms, birth control pills, and an invoice made out to me. My parents went ballistic and grounded me. Whoever staged this "hilarious" prank: well played, asshole. FML

#20684142
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67716) - you deserved it (5663)

On 05/24/2013 at 5:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla)



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