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SlytherinSyd

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SlytherinSyd
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 25 February 1996 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 740
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About SlytherinSyd : hey! I'm just here for the laughs. (: Kik: SlytherinSyd

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SlytherinSyd's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my boyfriend isn't gay. Apparently, I just give good head. FML

#7538814
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18968) - you deserved it (5778)

On 01/24/2010 at 3:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I met my boyfriend's notoriously difficult mother. I had been looking forward to meeting her and making a good impression. Unfortunately, I could not greet her as her son's penis was still in my mouth. FML

#7318001
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23707) - you deserved it (12191)

On 01/13/2010 at 11:42am - intimacy - by pleasedtomeetyou (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend called my cell. I picked up and said "Hi, this is Lisa and I want you to fuck me raw". It was my dad. He was at my boyfriend's parent's house and forgot his phone. FML

#7097610
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7483) - you deserved it (26506)

On 01/02/2010 at 2:02am - intimacy - by Lisa (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend told me it was her fantasy to orgasm at midnight on New Years. We got started at 11:53. I didn't last until midnight. FML

#7080938
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9763) - you deserved it (14909)

On 01/01/2010 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by FavreFan99 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mother confronted me about my bird's masturbation problem. We spent christmas eve googling "bird masturbating" and watching videos to see if that was actually what my bird was doing. At least he's having a good christmas. FML

#6933145
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20497) - you deserved it (2710)

On 12/25/2009 at 1:25am - animals - by suuuuuupucci (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend, who's a bit older than me, introduced me to his daughter. I was expecting a toddler. Nope, she's a year older than me. FML

#6698211
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11302) - you deserved it (31175)

On 12/10/2009 at 7:28pm - misc - by ohcrap (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend was telling me how concerned she was about her weight. I told her not to worry, because it gives more cushion for the pushin' anyway. She picked up a lamp and threw it right at my dingleberries. FML

#6679644
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7194) - you deserved it (65367)

On 12/09/2009 at 12:09pm - love - by ouch (man) - United States (California)

Today, I overhead my mother's request to be spanked harder by my dad. FML

#6532125
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21055) - you deserved it (1782)

On 11/30/2009 at 11:51am - intimacy - by NeedHeadPhone (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I spoke with my boyfriend's crazy ex-girlfriend. Actually, she isn't all that crazy. He really did cheat on her with half a dozen other girls. The same girls he's apparently cheating on me with. How do I know for sure? Thank you crazy ex for his email passwords. FML

#6521538
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39318) - you deserved it (4354)

On 11/29/2009 at 9:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized that our generation will be remembered as the kids who liked sparkly vampires. FML

#6439149
341 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67689) - you deserved it (11292)

On 11/24/2009 at 7:08pm - misc - by buhknee - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out that my mom had read my diary because she was worried. She now knows details about my depression, details about my sex life, such as how I lost my virginity, to whom (I don't have a boyfriend), and what condition I was in at the time (drunk as a duck). She also showed my dad. FML

#6389585
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30945) - you deserved it (18194)

On 11/21/2009 at 7:56am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, my girlfriend and I were sitting downstairs with my mom. We heard the dog running around upstairs and called it down. It came running down the stairs. With a used condom in its mouth. The same condom my girlfriend and I lost two weeks ago. It put it directly in my mom's hands. FML

#6356025
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12922) - you deserved it (5463)

On 11/18/2009 at 4:35pm - intimacy - by Tucker (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I noticed that in my cover letter I wrote "I also have an eye.", instead of "I also have an eye for details.", and I have been sending it out for the past few weeks. No wonder I haven't gotten any replies. FML

#6299927
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7706) - you deserved it (25601)

On 11/14/2009 at 11:52am - work - by crazylobster (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I went to have my eyebrows waxed for the first time. After signing in the receptionist looked at me and said "Lip wax?". I told her no, my eyebrows. She sat me down and the waxer walked up, took one look at me and said "Lip wax?" FML

#6230893
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26828) - you deserved it (8743)

On 11/09/2009 at 5:27pm - misc - by LoserOfTheYear (woman) - United States (New York)



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