Sleepwalker418

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Sleepwalker418

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 24 December 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7085
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Sleepwalker418 : :] Hi!

I'm not going to do the typical teenage thing and post my picture up and tYpe lYk ThiZ.

I'm just gonna chill, ya' dig?

Sleepwalker418's page activity

Visits<b>gary3768</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 8:42pm<b>sarah1024</b> - the 02/07/2013 at 10:24pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:08pm<b></b> - the 03/09/2011 at 10:23pm<b>DrDoofenshmirtz</b> - the 11/12/2010 at 8:56pm<b>JustSoLost</b> - the 09/02/2009 at 7:34pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 08/25/2009 at 8:04pm<b>moonlight_daze</b> - the 08/21/2009 at 10:21pm<b>prplr</b> - the 08/21/2009 at 4:31pm<b>rsjones</b> - the 08/19/2009 at 9:09pm<b>Failzoid</b> - the 07/27/2009 at 11:31am<b>Rosalind</b> - the 07/23/2009 at 10:01pm<b>voxt</b> - the 06/29/2009 at 7:20pm<b>AnnieLennox1954</b> - the 06/21/2009 at 5:58pm<b>Lizzy86</b> - the 06/19/2009 at 1:17pm<b>misssweetie</b> - the 06/11/2009 at 7:42pm<b>THC</b> - the 06/08/2009 at 10:12pm<b>donnieandalicia</b> - the 06/04/2009 at 9:49pm

Sleepwalker418's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Sleepwalker418's favorite FMLs

Today, I was driving down the road at about 10pm, when the passenger in the car in front of me threw something out the window. The object flew towards and landed directly on my windshield. It was a condom. A used condom. It wasn't tied. Semen spreads out quite a bit when you're driving fast. FML

by Aether / 05/03/2009 at 5:17pm / United States (Michigan) / Transportation

Today, I found out my girlfriend of 5 years cheated on me. When confronted she told me, "I didn't get wet so it wasn't cheating." FML

by amiadori / 05/01/2009 at 5:50am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my girlfriend of 5 years cheated on me. When confronted she told me, "I didn't get wet so it wasn't cheating." FML

by amiadori / 05/01/2009 at 5:50am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were laying naked in my bed making out. All of a sudden, we hear "pop goes the weasel" outside my house. My boyfriend stops and excitedly says, "ICE CREAM MAN", flips me over, grabs his clothes, and runs out of my room. FML

by soooyeah / 04/30/2009 at 8:15am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I got a spray tan for the first time. Naked, I climbed into the booth. When the machine started I became frightened by the loud roar of the spray and couldn't breathe. I pissed myself out of fear. I now have river-like streaks down both legs where the pee washed my tan away. FML

by tgstreaks / 04/23/2009 at 1:44am / United States (Mississippi) / Health

Today, I was on top of my boyfriend having sex and I was looking away doing my thing. When I looked back, my boyfriend had headphones on and was playing air drums. FML

by BerryRockstar / 04/21/2009 at 1:37pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was walking back to my home in the city in the dark. I'm paranoid, so when I saw movement behind me I clutched my mace. The faster I walked, the closer the person seemed to be. I spun around and sprayed my attacker with mace. It was my shadow and the wind blew the mace back into eyes. FML

by Eyesore / 04/16/2009 at 5:27pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at my new apartment. My fiancé was coming home so I filled the apartment with candles and put on some sexy music. When he came up to my door, I answered the door, naked. What I didn't know was that he was bringing his dad to see the new apartment. FML

by nudesurprise / 04/16/2009 at 10:49am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I went to a bar with two guys I was interested in. The first I'd been trying to go out with all semester. The second I had gone to dinner with and he seemed nice. I was the designated driver. They drank too much and, on the way home, hooked up in the back seat. FML

by sad_gay / 04/16/2009 at 4:40am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML

by filipinoclari808 / 04/16/2009 at 2:47am / United States (Hawaii) / Love

Today, I asked my girl friend of a year and a half to give me a blow job. She replied okay and bent down and blew on my penis. Then she looked up at me and said was that good. She was serious. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2009 at 12:12am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML

by eun / 04/08/2009 at 9:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting ready to get in the shower. Completely naked, I pulled the curtain away and there was a huge spider on the wall in the shower. I screamed and my husband, disoriented from sleeping, came running in and knocked me over. I killed the spider with my forehead and broke my nose. FML

by sodaxpopxhiccups / 04/03/2009 at 5:07am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a mother wrote me a $130 check for babysitting her four kids for a few hours. Trying to be gracious, I said, "Wow, thank you, this is very generous!" She thought for a minute, then said, "You're right." She took the check back, ripped it up, and wrote me a new one for $55. FML

by Anonymous / 03/30/2009 at 9:34am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous