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SkullFracture's favorite FMLs
by fml / 09/03/2013 at 2:31am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML
by SplishSplash / 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, tired of everyone forgetting my birthday, I traveled half way around the world to spend my 40th at a five star resort just to try and make it special. The hotel brought me a cake with someone else's name on it. FML
by nevercatchabreak / 08/31/2013 at 4:16am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I moved into my new place. It evidently used to belong to a hooker, because although I've only lived here for 9 hours, so far several different men have knocked on my door and asked if "Stephanie" is available for a good time. FML
by Anonymous / 08/31/2013 at 3:24am / United Kingdom (Redbridge) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mother yet again went on a long rant about how much of a loser I am as I have "never had boyfriend" and I'm 26. Truth is, I've been in the same relationship for over five years but it "doesn't count because he's black." FML
by Anonymous / 08/29/2013 at 8:48pm / United Kingdom / Love
by Anonymous / 08/29/2013 at 8:16pm / United States (New York) / Animals
by Poly24 / 08/27/2013 at 6:32am / Kids
by Miami6and3 / 08/26/2013 at 2:22pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by seriously? / 08/23/2013 at 3:40am / Miscellaneous
by NotInterested / 08/23/2013 at 2:23am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at the library. I had to use the restroom, where I ended up singing in bad, made-up Japanese the whole time. When I went back across the library, my brother informed me that everyone could clearly hear me. FML
by Singer_Song / 08/23/2013 at 1:04am / United States / Miscellaneous
by thanksad / 08/22/2013 at 9:38pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by me / 08/21/2013 at 7:45pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Love
by Anonymous / 08/20/2013 at 6:46pm / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Intimacy
Today, I asked out the girl who always looks and smiles at me in class. I was surprised when she rejected me until I found out she was actually always looking at the clock behind me, and smiling when class is almost over. FML
by Anonymous / 08/20/2013 at 5:37pm / United States (California) / Love