SkipperDan42

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SkipperDan42

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 14 August 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 198
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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SkipperDan42's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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SkipperDan42's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad came into my room, looked at my laptop, and said he could hear the porn I was watching all the way from his room. I wasn't watching porn. We soon realised it was actually coming from his mobile phone. FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2013 at 3:07pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I was mugged in a public bathroom. All I had on me was a plastic sheriff's badge, so I gave it to them. They laughed me out of the restroom. FML

by the_lameo_geek / 10/20/2013 at 10:16pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to babysit two kids. It all went well until one of them duct taped a knife to a toy machine gun, lit the barbecue on fire, and ran around like a wild banshee screaming obscenities. The other one got scared and climbed onto the roof of the house. FML

by ellen77 / 09/13/2013 at 1:55am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I was at a coffee shop, when a middle-aged guy called me a "two-timing whore", dumped his coffee on me and walked out in tears. I'm 14 and I have no idea who he was. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2013 at 6:43pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that Cheetos are flammable, as is my hair. FML

by ClaireWinchester / 09/01/2013 at 8:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my mother yet again went on a long rant about how much of a loser I am as I have "never had boyfriend" and I'm 26. Truth is, I've been in the same relationship for over five years but it "doesn't count because he's black." FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2013 at 8:48pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I actually had to explain to my husband why his habit of wiping his boogers off into our baby's hair has to stop. FML

by grossedout / 08/29/2013 at 12:26pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML

by Thanks everyone / 08/28/2013 at 6:35pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, my mom visited my new apartment for the first time. I was showing her the bedroom, when she looked into my opened sock drawer and said, "Using Durex, eh? Yeah, you were born 'cause a Trojan split." FML

by thanks mom ¬_¬ / 08/24/2013 at 6:05pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, at work, I had to utter the phrase, "Sir, please stop rubbing yourself with the peas." It's exactly how it sounds. FML

by twatstick / 08/21/2013 at 1:30pm / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Work

Today, I found my dad drunk, sitting on the bathroom floor crying. When I asked him why, he said, "My son is gay." I'm his only child, and I'm a girl. FML

by anonymous / 08/19/2013 at 1:41am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on drive-thru where I work. Our policy is that we can give free treats to dogs that come through. A woman came in and I noticed her dog. Without a thought, I grabbed a treat and asked if her dog wanted one. I looked again. The 'dog' was her daughter. FML

by Treats For Days / 07/19/2013 at 9:54am / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, one of my cats gave birth. My other cat responded by eating the new litter in a jealous rage, then got indigestion and vomited. I had to clean up regurgitated kittens. FML

by coldstar / 07/18/2013 at 5:06am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at the park playing Frisbee with my friends, when I saw a boy sitting on a bench looking rather sad. "Hey!" I yelled, and he looked up at me. I lightly threw the Frisbee in his direction, and it hit him in the face. He was blind. FML

by WasntMe / 07/17/2013 at 7:15pm / United States / Kids