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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I got an e-mail from a girl, asking if my boyfriend was indeed my boyfriend. I sent back a gushing message about how much I loved him and how well he treated me. She replied "Yeah, I know. He was supposed to be my boyfriend, too." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26040) - you deserved it (2487)
On 11/02/2009 at 12:08am - love - by OhJoy (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was at a party and saw an old friend from college. I went up to her asking how she was and how her family was. She went on to tell me that her husband left her a month ago and started crying. I told her that he was an ass anyway and that she didn't need him. Turns out he died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23806) - you deserved it (9245)
On 11/01/2009 at 8:43pm - misc - by Oops (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was in a hurry to get to work and I put on yesterday's jeans. While at my meeting an employee asked me if 'that' was mine and pointed to something on the floor next to me. Which was yesterday's underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8744) - you deserved it (17594)
On 10/16/2009 at 12:30pm - misc - by Sbfreak510 - Sent from mobile version
Today, this guy and I went on a date to the movies. We got up to the desk and I asked for one ticket for 'Jennifer's Body.' The guy moved his way in front of me and said, "make that two tickets." He then walked away to look at movie posters and left me with the $22.50 charge. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21934) - you deserved it (4366)
On 10/14/2009 at 9:47pm - misc - by Nikki (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10189) - you deserved it (40995)
On 09/03/2009 at 4:59pm - misc - by Co-B (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, was my third day at work. The hazing finally began. After a few rounds of "punch the new guy", I thought I would finally be safe because the manager walked into the kitchen. He saw what was going on, picked up a handful of ketchup packets, and began throwing them at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31810) - you deserved it (3221)
On 08/29/2009 at 5:02pm - work - by newguy (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9059) - you deserved it (47103)
On 08/29/2009 at 11:13am - love - by coolhand (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, on the train on the way to my mother's house, I was playing Mariokart with my son. He got a 'bomb' item, and yelled quite loudly, "I have a bomb!". Panic ensued. We got thrown off the train at the next stop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38130) - you deserved it (4701)
On 08/28/2009 at 12:41am - kids - by mariokarter (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I had my friend Mark over for dinner. My Dad asked him what his dad did for a living. We all squirmed a bit when he told us that his dad died last year. We all went about finishing our meal when suddenly my dad says: "I'm sorry, Mark, what did you say your dad did for a living again?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (41792) - you deserved it (1861)
On 08/25/2009 at 12:40am - misc - by youzabadgirl12 - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I was at a 21st birthday party. It got to the bit where they blow out the candles and the girl hosting blew out her candles. While she was blowing I whispered to the fella next to me, "That's not the only thing she'll be blowing tonight". The guy next to me was her dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10623) - you deserved it (62970)
On 06/08/2009 at 6:39am - intimacy - by baller (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was on the phone with my best guy friend, who I have loved for years. I was talking about school and all of a sudden he said "I love you." I flipped out saying "Oh my god, oh my god. I love you, too!" He responded with "what?" He was talking to his mom, who was walking out the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52106) - you deserved it (11060)
On 06/02/2009 at 4:51pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52216) - you deserved it (4067)
On 06/02/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Higgs (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I was talking this guy I'm dating and stated that the only reason I am with him is because of what he buys me. I was joking. He then responded that he doesn't care because the only reason he is with me is because I give good head. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16716) - you deserved it (45689)
On 06/01/2009 at 1:47pm - intimacy - by sweet_02 (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I won $200 a contest at a bar. The manager took me to a vault where money collected from the strippers go into a pool. He told me that at least half of the bills were slid through a strippers butt crack so I was to "choose wisely". FML
I agree, your life sucks (34466) - you deserved it (6234)
On 05/30/2009 at 7:39am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, while the kid I was babysitting was in the bathroom, he called to me "I need some help in here." Worried I ran to the bathroom and asked him what was wrong. He needed me to wipe his butt. As if that weren't gross enough, just as my hand was under his butt, he pooped again and laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49693) - you deserved it (4196)
On 05/30/2009 at 12:24am - kids - by sdasdflkjas (woman) - United States
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