SimmoRocks

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SimmoRocks

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1905
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About SimmoRocks : Guitarist of ChainSaw ChestPain and all-round nice guy :)

Check us out:

facebook.com/ChainSawChestPain

SimmoRocks's page activity

Visits<b>redstone7693</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 11:18am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 8:46am<b>sneakattacked</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 1:36am<b>IERTysonI</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 5:26pm<b>Global_User</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 11:06pm<b>perdix</b> - the 09/28/2011 at 8:45am<b>Hemi_Driven</b> - the 09/28/2011 at 8:22am<b>TheWicked</b> - the 05/18/2011 at 6:49am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 2:46pm

SimmoRocks's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

SimmoRocks's favorite FMLs

Today, after speeding home due to an overflowing bladder, I ran to the bathroom, forgetting that the toilet seat was broken. While doing my business, the toilet seat and I both slid off the bowl. FML

by Anonymous / 03/17/2011 at 2:57pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

by Anonymous / 02/04/2011 at 12:42am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, at work, I spent half an hour on the phone with a customer. At the end of the conversation, as he was putting down the phone, I heard him say 'God, he was a miserable git'. I'm a 28 year old woman. FML

by tgpgs / 01/19/2011 at 9:55am / Work

Today, a friend asked me to come with her to the art building at school, so I could pose in the stance of a figure she was drawing for her exam. I obliged and sat for the pose. When the art teacher walked by she looked at me, then at the sketch, pointed to the legs and said, "make them fatter". FML

by humiliated / 01/14/2011 at 11:28am / United Kingdom (East Ayrshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife was complaining she always has to put up the Christmas tree. So this year while she was out shopping, I decided to put it up. I set it too close to the fireplace and it caught fire. I'm a firefighter. FML

Today, while working as a hotel guard I found a homeless man lying in the grass. I asked him to move and he ignored me, continuing to lie there with his head resting on his arms and a big smile on his face. I got annoyed and started to yell at him. After a few minutes I realized he was dead. FML

by Anonymous / 12/07/2010 at 11:18pm / United States / Work

Today, I was in a public washroom and I had to take a dump. I knew how dirty the toilets were, so tried to do the "stand and poo." Unfortunately, I slipped and the poo fell on the ground. Then I realized there were no paper towels. There was a line outside waiting. FML

by sweet_stufz / 11/11/2010 at 8:30am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I came home to find that my pregnant cat had given birth to a stillborn kitten in every room of the house. It had then rubbed its butt around the house, leaving bloody stains everywhere. When I went to clean the white carpet, the bleach turned it green. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2010 at 12:33pm / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I went to move my dog that had been napping in the middle of my bed for the last few hours, only to discover that he wasn't napping. He died. FML

by jrad / 09/08/2010 at 3:23pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, while driving through town, I was distracted by a pretty girl walking on the nearby pavement and accidentally rear-ended the car in front of me. Not only did the pretty girl witness the crash and give a statement, it turned out she was a very feminine man. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2010 at 6:12am / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Transportation

Today, I overhead my mother's request to be spanked harder by my dad. FML

by NeedHeadPhone / 11/30/2009 at 11:51am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I drove 100 miles from my parents house to mine. I had only a few miles left when I realized I really had to pee. I didn't want to pull over somewhere when I was so close to home, so I sped up. A cop pulled me over a block from my house. I started to sob, and ended up peeing myself. FML

by anonymous / 10/19/2009 at 3:16pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, I got a phone call for a interview at Target at 4:30 pm. I got super excited, so I got dressed up and headed over there. I tell the manager that I am there for my interview. He doesn't know what I'm talking about. My friends had prank called me. FML

by Pho_Rheal / 09/24/2009 at 8:11pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, I was driving my new car home when I came around a sharp turn to see a groundhog in the road. I kindly stopped and allowed it to cross when all of the sudden a car slammed into the back of mine. Then, another car went flying around us. That car hit and killed the groundhog. FML

by hatecolin / 09/10/2009 at 2:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Transportation

Today, I walked in on my parents doing it. Luckily they didn't see me so I slipped out. I looked outside, trying to take my mind of the horrors I had just witnessed, only to realize my dad's car wasn't in the driveway. FML

by WTF / 09/05/2009 at 6:11pm / United States (Texas) / Kids