SimmoRocks

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SimmoRocks

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1907
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About SimmoRocks : Guitarist of ChainSaw ChestPain and all-round nice guy :)

Check us out:

facebook.com/ChainSawChestPain

SimmoRocks's page activity

Visits<b>redstone7693</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 11:18am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 8:46am<b>sneakattacked</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 1:36am<b>IERTysonI</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 5:26pm<b>Global_User</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 11:06pm<b>perdix</b> - the 09/28/2011 at 8:45am<b>Hemi_Driven</b> - the 09/28/2011 at 8:22am<b>TheWicked</b> - the 05/18/2011 at 6:49am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 2:46pm

SimmoRocks's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

SimmoRocks's favorite FMLs

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

by katie / 05/25/2011 at 4:23am / Intimacy

Today, I had to explain to my sobbing teenage daughter why you can't get pregnant from masturbating. FML

by asnolt / 05/24/2011 at 6:29pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

by no one / 05/21/2011 at 5:07am / United States (Alaska) / Intimacy

Today, I went over to a guy's house for dinner. He ended up getting really drunk and started crying, telling me that I reminded him of his dead ferret. Distraught, he tearfully showed me her ashes. FML

by SophieGray / 05/20/2011 at 7:33pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I had my new girlfriend over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, my dad started poking her with his fork. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he barked back, "Just making sure she isn't a blow-up doll!" FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2011 at 7:30pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I tore up my airborne academy admission documents because my lab results weren't good enough. A few hours later, they called me to apologize for the misunderstanding, mine turned out to be perfect and they'd accepted me. They need me tomorrow with all the documents to finalize the admission. FML

by SkyDiver / 05/20/2011 at 3:46am / Work

Today, I was making out with this guy that I like. In an attempt to be romantic, he tried to pick me up and press me against the wall. He couldn't lift me off the ground. FML

by Fatty / 05/16/2011 at 10:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML

by ali grace / 05/14/2011 at 7:15am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, while being robbed, a man heroically chased down the robber and got my purse back. He then looked at the distance between us, turned the other way and ran off with it. FML

by Anonymous / 04/29/2011 at 2:29am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

by Mike / 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm / Health

Today, I told my son that his grades are dropping and his behavior is getting out of hand. To which he replied, "Yeah, so is your weight." FML

by randa / 04/19/2011 at 2:38am / Kids

Today, my sister told me she didn’t want me in her wedding pictures because I looked fat in my bridesmaid's dress. FML

by samikai523 / 04/18/2011 at 4:25pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally started my job as an in-home caregiver. The man I was hired to care for died two hours after I made it to his house. FML

by nurseITHINKNOT / 04/18/2011 at 3:24pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work

Today, I was fired from my job. Apparently getting shot is no valid reason to stay home. FML

by davka / 04/18/2011 at 11:09am / Work

Today, I got a call from a girl I was seeing. She said that she was falling for someone else, but she still liked me and couldn't decide what to do. Being the romantic (idiot) I am, I told her that she should do what would make her happiest, thinking that she would pick me. She didn't. FML

by HFCS / 04/18/2011 at 12:53am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.