Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SimmoRocks

Search for a member

SimmoRocks

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1066
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About SimmoRocks : Guitarist of ChainSaw ChestPain and all-round nice guy :)

Check us out:

facebook.com/ChainSawChestPain

SimmoRocks's page activity

Visits<b>sneakattacked</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 1:36am<b>IERTysonI</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 5:26pm<b>Global_User</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 11:06pm<b>perdix</b> - the 09/28/2011 at 8:45am<b>Hemi_Driven</b> - the 09/28/2011 at 8:22am<b>TheWicked</b> - the 05/18/2011 at 6:49am

SimmoRocks's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

SimmoRocks's favorite FMLs

Today, some friends and I were pulled over on our way back from a party. We'd had a few drinks, so we tried to play it cool just in case we were over the limit. The cop didn't seem to want to breathalyze us, until my really high friend in the back seat said, "These are not the droids you are looking for." FML

#18451653
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12952) - you deserved it (41143)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:46am - misc - by Notadrinkanddriveidiot - United States

Today, I was at the mall and started singing along to the playing of "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas." A kid glanced at me and said to her mom, "She IS a hippopotamus." FML

#18358747
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30074) - you deserved it (9467)

On 11/26/2011 at 6:13pm - misc - by Person15 - United States (Indiana)

Today, I carpooled with my co-worker whose girlfriend has left him. The radio was playing the song "Jar of Hearts." He then began to sing intensely, and broke down crying. FML

#18244080
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26623) - you deserved it (2788)

On 11/14/2011 at 3:45am - work - by Anon - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was yelled at by a customer because I couldn't tell her where the vitamins were in the pharmacy. The manager came and yelled at me for being lazy and incompetent. I work in the store across the street from the pharmacy. FML

#18190059
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29766) - you deserved it (2296)

On 11/08/2011 at 12:45am - work - by jodafish - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my girlfriend came to my house crying because the guy who she has been cheating on me with doesn't want to be with her anymore. FML

#18163904
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54058) - you deserved it (3876)

On 11/05/2011 at 11:40am - love - by oink401 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to tell all the trick-or-treaters that I'd run out of candy. I'd actually bought about $50 worth of candy, but managed to eat all of it by myself, sitting alone in my apartment, exactly like last year. FML

#18127186
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12099) - you deserved it (41389)

On 11/01/2011 at 5:09am - misc - by candice - Reserved

Today, my new coworker asked if I knew her daughter. I responded yes and asked how her pregnancy was going. She didn't know her daughter was pregnant. FML

#17920889
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38626) - you deserved it (6142)

On 10/06/2011 at 4:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, at work I got an urgent message from my boyfriend that there was an emergency and I should come home immediately. I took my last personal day of the month and drove the half-hour home. The emergency? The cat had vomited on the comforter. FML

#17901158
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26011) - you deserved it (3105)

On 10/04/2011 at 12:48am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

#17839569
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19868) - you deserved it (43630)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)

Today, I spilled hot coffee all over this man at work. I tried apologizing and saying it was an accident, but he then complained, which resulted in me being unemployed. The man I spilled coffee on was my uncle. FML

#17834355
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29283) - you deserved it (2599)

On 09/25/2011 at 9:57pm - work - by Chan - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years said she was leaving me because recently I wasn't making much money, and was playing too many video games. I recently got a raise at my job of 5 years. The job? Testing video games. FML

#17827650
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36989) - you deserved it (3481)

On 09/25/2011 at 4:12am - love - by Eric Moore - United States (Texas)

Today, after months of grueling training and countless early mornings, I finally began the race I had been preparing for over the past year, only to slip and break my leg in the first 450 meters. FML

#17827481
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33774) - you deserved it (2576)

On 09/25/2011 at 3:23am - health - by jc2011 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I finally found out that the tattoo on my lower back means "slut" in Chinese, instead of "good fortune" as I always thought it did. FML

#17612047
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12088) - you deserved it (52429)

On 08/29/2011 at 12:22pm - misc - by slut (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend and I were making out while she was laying on me. Her little brother walked in, saw us and yelled, "Mom they're swallowing each other!" FML

#17068940
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27234) - you deserved it (22462)

On 07/11/2011 at 5:08pm - intimacy - by tony456 (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, my family attended the funeral of an old family friend's baby, who died in childbirth. Afterwards, my husband went around snickering and quietly telling dead baby jokes to the other attendees. FML

#17004693
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51040) - you deserved it (5593)

On 07/06/2011 at 7:38pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: