Silvertooth5525

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Offline (the 06/14/2016 at 8:56pm)

Silvertooth5525

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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 366
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Silvertooth5525's page activity

Visits<b>ElliottRose</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 8:58pm<b>Ari3l</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 8:44pm<b>Naveed_N</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 12:30pm<b>chrissapp</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 1:58am<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 11:16pm

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Silvertooth5525's favorite FMLs

Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2015 at 11:34am / Ireland / Health

Today, I asked out a girl that I've liked for a while. She thought I was joking and laughed, saying, "No. Have you met yourself?" FML

by SilverZephyr / 01/16/2015 at 7:49am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I had lunch with my parents. I'm an Asian guy who married a Puerto Rican woman and we just had a boy. My dad looks at my son, then looks at me and says, "You ruined the bloodline." FML

by Northshore75 / 01/15/2015 at 5:24pm / United States (California) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my nutjob girlfriend dumped me for refusing to stop talking to my best friend, just because she's a woman. Before she left, my now-ex decided to punish me by destroying the dissertation I've spent months working on, along with both backups of it. FML

by Can I press charges? / 01/15/2015 at 12:23pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I was faced with the inevitable horrible circumstances which lead me to put in a tampon on a moving city bus. FML

by bloody_hell / 01/14/2015 at 9:18pm / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, I was passing notes in class with my crush. I started to pour my heart out and tell him about how I've liked him for years. I was caught by the teacher. He looked at it, laughed, and tore it up. He then looked at me and said, "I just saved you from years of embarrassment. You're welcome." FML

by Rachel / 10/23/2014 at 12:04am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML

by BadLuckLad / 10/22/2014 at 6:38pm / United Kingdom (Portsmouth) / Intimacy

Today, I dressed up in my nicest clothes and spent ages putting makeup on before going to a nightclub, hoping to meet someone nice. The only person who acknowledged me was a guy who yelled, "Hey, wanna fuck?! Not like anyone else would ever touch you, am I right?!" FML

by Anonymous / 10/22/2014 at 11:06am / Mexico (Nuevo Leon) / Love

Today, I lost my laptop, but I have my old childhood computer to use. It's password-protected, and the hint to the password is "meaner than Hera." I haven't been into Greek mythology since I was a kid, and if anything, this computer has just shown me how dumb I've gotten over the years. FML

by HeckIfIKnow / 10/21/2014 at 11:36pm / United States (California) / Geek

Today, I fell asleep on the couch. My parents didn't wake me up, went to bed and set our burglar alarm. If I trip a motion sensor, a siren will go off. The motion sensor in my living room is pointed directly at me and I have to pee. It's been 2 hours. FML

by anonymous / 10/21/2014 at 10:11pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my birthday. When I asked my mom if we were gonna do anything special for my birthday. She said, "don't lie to me. It's not your birthday." FML

by bad birthdays / 08/16/2014 at 1:09am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while walking to work, I saw a homeless guy with a funny "NEED MONEY 4 BOOZE" sign, so I gave him a few spare dollars for his humor. On my way back home, he was out cold on the sidewalk with several empty bottles beside him. Whoops. FML

by thoughthewasjoking / 08/15/2014 at 5:10pm / United States (Alabama) / Money

Today, I tried skydiving for the first time. The professional I was attached to had a boner the whole way down. FML

by emmamrose7 / 08/14/2014 at 11:36pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I went to my new gynecologist. He has an eye twitch, and every time he asks about my genitals, he winks at me. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2014 at 11:35pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I took part in a raffle that was being organised in the small countryside village where I'm vacationing. I live in big city. I won a duck. A real, live duck. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2014 at 12:38am / France / Animals