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Shorttninja1

Offline (the 08/26/2014 at 7:33pm) | Search for a member

Shorttninja1

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 18 November 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1725
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Shorttninja1's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Shorttninja1's badges

Shorttninja1's favorite FMLs

Today I was bitched out at 2am by my parents fir trying to "sneak out." I was sneaking looool out of my bedroom to take a crap. FML

#21048094
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42046) - you deserved it (3659)

On 02/02/2014 at 12:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today... I Was Singing In The Shower But Couldn't Hit The Higher Notes. My Wife Complained An 2 Minutes Later She Ran A Tap Causing My Shower To Go Freezing. I Shrieked. My Wife Said My Pitch Was Still Wrong. Mega FML

#21048056
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39618) - you deserved it (8065)

On 02/02/2014 at 11:53am - misc - by deargodthepain (man) - United States

Today.. . My Husband Decided To Put Different Condiment On My Body To Make Our Sex Better . I Was Thinking Whipped Cream; He Was Feeling Ketchup . FML

#21039277
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51678) - you deserved it (5858)

On 01/25/2014 at 7:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today... I dropped a $400 bottle of wine while trying to get the cork out. FML

#20982484
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42372) - you deserved it (16223)

On 12/06/2013 at 2:08am - money - by butterfingers - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, mah girlfriend wants to make a video of us having sex fir us to watch later and figure out how to improve our skills in bed. The problem is her choice of cameraman: her uncle. FML

#20978171
204 comments

today mah grlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood , she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. fat FML

#20963410
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57664) - you deserved it (8776)

On 11/19/2013 at 2:46pm - intimacy - by oops999 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Tadayhile I was in a bathroom stall... the guy next to me asked me fir toilet paper. It was then that I realized I didn't have any either. FML

#20957459
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41287) - you deserved it (4444)

On 11/14/2013 at 11:44am - misc - by CallmeEddie - United States (Illinois)

Today one of the special needs teens I work with confessd his love for me. It was cute until he puttd his erection on mah leg and attemptd to hump me. FML

Today I realized ow amazing I've become at faking orgasms: I made up everyting from te noise of juice to pure blissful climax over te pone to usband . He came; I finised putting laundry away . FML

#20955991
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48039) - you deserved it (12625)

On 11/13/2013 at 1:40am - intimacy - by CanWeAllGetOne - United States (Texas)

Today , mah ex boyfriend got into a physical fight with the guy I've been casually seeing for 9 months . Afterwards , they had a beer , a long chat , and decided this was mah fault and I wasn't worth the drama .

#20933266
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44660) - you deserved it (20028)

On 10/25/2013 at 7:54am - love - by what did I do? - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I want to a auntad ousa wit ta grl I lika, tinking tat sa would gat scarad and turn to ma for comfort. I andad up running out, and was put on ta Wall of Sama. FML

#20933080
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34586) - you deserved it (18676)

On 10/25/2013 at 12:35am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I ad to call a plumber out to clear a blockage in our batroom drainpipe. After coming back from work later in te day, and after a tearful confession from my wife, I found out tat pipe wasn't te only one e snakd. FML

#20932505
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56225) - you deserved it (3756)

On 10/24/2013 at 4:06pm - misc - by soon to be divorced (man) - United States

Today, mah dog got out of the house. I was running after him and remembered the old ( pretend you're hurt ) trick. I got on the ground, and cried out as if I was hurt. My dog just kept running. FML

Today , I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see wat it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room , build momentum , an launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. real FML

#20929956
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46036) - you deserved it (4877)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:12am - animals - by IamAflyingCat - United States

TODAY MAH BOYFRIEND BROKE A GLASS IN THE KITCHEN AND ACCIDENTALLY STEPPED ON IT CUTTING HIS FOOT. HE ASKED ME IF I COULD HELP HIM CLEAN HIS CUT. APPARENTLY HE'S TICKLISH AND I NOW HAVE A HUGE BRUISE ON MAH CHEST FROM WHERE HE KICKED ME. FML

#20929509
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39509) - you deserved it (3251)

On 10/21/2013 at 9:24pm - health - by ouch.... (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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