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Shadowvoid

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Shadowvoid

132Fucked!

ShadowvoidShadowvoid
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 14 April 1936 (79 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1742
  • Number of comments : 240
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About Shadowvoid : About me: I made it to college. Ask if you wanna know.
I'm silly. I have 3 dogs. Tried to set my birthday as 1 B.C., but FML said I was too old. Guess they didn't get the memo that I am ageless and timeless. Oh well
There is a squirrel on my head her name is Giblets. My dog is Captain oh the HMS Floaty Raft. I am an actual ninja turtle.
Some call me Mitchell, others call me their worst nightmare, actually my old Science Teacher called me Steve? (I still don't know why) I like rock music and certain metal. Whoever put the "fun" in "funeral" must have been a real asshole. Please message me if you are from outside of the U.S. (We can still talk if you are in the U.S.) I love to know about other cultures.
If this message system is too slow, kik: shadowvoid

My comments are either a joke or another joke, do not take them too seriously.

Quote of the Month: "i'm too lazy for a new quote" -me

Message me as well, I look forward to reading them.
And remember: "Jeebus lubs you"

Shadowvoid's page activity

Visits<b>ItsKennyBaby</b> - 18 hours ago<b>CloudyFromSteam</b> - yesterday at 11:23pm<b>Rskittles10</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 8:39pm<b>rachel_mae_</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 7:37pm<b>Skydiver2001</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 6:39pm<b>MDoremis</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 1:05pm<b>nesteremily</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 3:02am<b>KatPlaysMC</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 2:39am<b>lopez_estefania</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 12:02am<b>Leigghhh</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 8:06pm<b>PrincessKenny</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 3:43am<b>JustMe1600</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 2:39am<b>eski2015</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 2:35am<b>CandyDawg</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 12:25am<b>etinta</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 4:14pm<b>annabeldiaz</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 1:28pm<b>lizflores</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 12:56pm<b>russianmafia</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 11:49am

Fucked!<b>Rskittles10</b> - yesterday at 2:39am<b>etinta</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 10:16pm<b>LHOTP</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 5:59am<b>rachel_mae_</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 2:35am<b>ShortStop19</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 1:25am<b>_delaneybear</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 6:53am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 2:38pm<b>Xsweglord420x</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 7:48am<b>chookie99</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 12:26pm<b>Skulllily</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 5:49am<b>hallieee</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 8:58am<b>Nickynickk0</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 4:51am<b>UselessReject23</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 12:40am<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 12:32am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 5:03am<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 2:02am<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 12:12am<b>whitnayfortooh</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 5:49pm

Shadowvoid's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Shadowvoid's badges

Shadowvoid's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to wait thirty minutes after closing to check out a lady who was purchasing 20 different styles of curtains. I asked what she would be doing with them all, and she replied that she would be bringing 19 of them back tomorrow, as she didn't know which would match. FML

#21448838
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24310) - you deserved it (1575)

On 07/28/2015 at 11:04pm - work - by jlmbull - United States (Michigan)

Today, I decided to go thrifting to save some money. Ironically, I ended up having to pay for an emergency trip to the hospital because somebody was too lazy to wash the cat hair off their clothes. I'm severely allergic to cats. FML

#21425208
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22779) - you deserved it (7806)

On 06/12/2015 at 10:41pm - misc - by alyssaamarante - United States (New York)

Today, I was invited to an adult toy party with co-workers. They started by playing a game called 'Never Ever Have I Ever' about everyone's sexual exploits. My mother is a co-worker. I can never un-hear what I heard. FML

#21425174
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28693) - you deserved it (5839)

On 06/12/2015 at 9:22pm - intimacy - by silverspud - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got a Brazilian wax in anticipation of becoming intimate for the first time this weekend with a man I have dated for a few weeks. I'm so sore it hurts just to walk. FML

#21424841
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23945) - you deserved it (6778)

On 06/12/2015 at 2:50am - intimacy - by Pattie (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was studying for a big test I have next Tuesday in my room. I heard a creak in my ceiling but assumed it was nothing as my house is old. Thirty seconds later something fell from my air vent directly onto my head. It was a giant cockroach. FML

#21424815
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25774) - you deserved it (1776)

On 06/12/2015 at 1:35am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my long-distance boyfriend arrived, took off my bra and told my boobs, "I missed you guys", then took off my panties and said, "Hey buddy" to my vagina before saying he missed me to my face. FML

Today, I attempted to break the record for the heaviest squat in my local gym. A small crowd witnessed me breaking the record as well as releasing a huge fart. FML

#21420235
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27200) - you deserved it (5409)

On 06/03/2015 at 1:36pm - health - by YuckyDuckyLucky - Norway (Oslo)

Today, when leaving my apartment, I instantly noticed there was a giant dump truck in our lot, which turned out to be directly behind my car. After making a 20-point escape from my parking space and getting to work late, my roommate texts me "DUDE guess what I got last night". A giant dump truck. FML

#21420204
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24818) - you deserved it (1884)

On 06/03/2015 at 12:18pm - misc - by dump truck hater (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, the babysitter not only clogged the toilet, they tried to unclog it with our vacuum cleaner hose. FML

#21418872
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26263) - you deserved it (1904)

On 05/31/2015 at 11:37pm - misc - by somebody (woman) - United States

Today, I called 911 to report a drunk driver. The operator yelled at me for following the guy and told me to get off the phone because I shouldn't be driving with a phone to my ear. FML

#21416830
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26531) - you deserved it (6437)

On 05/27/2015 at 9:28pm - misc - by drivingmecrazy - United States (California)

Today, I felt pretty. As I deal with a severe anxiety and depression, I was proud of myself. All until a little girl asked: "Are you a boy or a girl?" FML

Today, some guy walked into the restaurant I work at and ordered enough food to serve the entire National Guard of Texas. He thanked us by leaving a $0.50 tip and shitting on the bathroom floor. FML

#21413064
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26865) - you deserved it (1626)

On 05/20/2015 at 2:40pm - work - by kmctl - United States (California)

Today, I surprised my 7 and 1.5 year old girls with a princess dinner. I quickly realized it was a scam when the "princesses" arrived looking more suited to a bachelor party. I was able to quickly get the girls out, but have spent the evening explaining why Pocahontas was heavily tattooed. FML

Today, my little cousin was helping me wash my car. After scrubbing all the dirt, I gave him the hose and said, "Okay, now rinse off this disgusting thing." He turned the hose on me. FML

#21409816
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23868) - you deserved it (5843)

On 05/14/2015 at 12:26am - kids - by ptarr12345 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my sister and I heard back from a job we both applied to. I had used the knowledge from my MBA degree to write a six-page essay for the application, while she just copied and pasted hers from a random website. Guess who got the job. FML

#21393558
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34297) - you deserved it (3239)

On 04/14/2015 at 2:15pm - work - by Anyonexx0 - United States (District of Columbia)



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