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Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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ShadowSwept's favorite FMLs
by flipnazn / 07/15/2011 at 12:24am / United States (Texas) / Animals
by ugh annoying / 07/01/2011 at 3:41am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML
by techiefIve / 06/14/2011 at 6:04am / United States (California) / Geek
by El Stupido / 06/12/2011 at 9:51am / Australia (Queensland) / Transportation
by julia / 06/11/2011 at 7:12am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
by cdn_steed / 04/23/2011 at 9:11am / United States (New York) / Animals
by Anonymous / 04/19/2011 at 10:21pm / United States / Animals
Today, I heard that one of our customers had passed away. Saddened, I told everyone who came into our shop about his death. Understandably, some customers got very upset and one even fainted. Suddenly, the 'dead' man walked into the shop. Turns out I got the name wrong. FML
by Anonymous / 04/04/2011 at 8:17pm / Ireland (Cavan) / Health
by lynn777 / 04/04/2011 at 4:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
Today, my dad woke me up for the second time to get me ready for school. Wanting me to prove I was really awake, he made me sit up. As soon as he left my room, I dozed off and faceplanted my nightstand. FML
by Username / 04/04/2011 at 1:36pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was trying to replace the lightbulb in my bedroom. Since I couldn't reach it by myself, I grabbed and stood on a chair. After I got two broken bones, and had stitches in my forehead, I figured that using a chair with wheels probably wasn't the best idea after all. FML
by owies :( / 03/31/2011 at 10:23pm / United States (Florida) / Health
Today, I was in church. After we were done praying, I quickly sat back down, accidentally crushing my testicles in the process. I squealed loudly and all but pissed my pants, earning me plenty of weird looks from the congregation. FML
by Nate / 03/31/2011 at 11:54am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, my friends sat me down and said they were concerned I was self-harming. I don't self-harm, I'm just a massive klutz. They don't believe me, and want me to get professional help. And now, because I found it all so funny, they think I'm mentally unhinged. FML
by Alisha / 03/30/2011 at 1:28pm / United Kingdom (Stirling) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I was playing video games in the dark and drinking soda during the slow periods. When I took… Today, I got in to an argument with my girlfriend. Why? Because she wouldn't believe me when I told… Today, I got home from a double shift to find my husband in bed with my sister. Also, I found out I…