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Shadow1368's FML badges
You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Shadow1368's favorite FMLs
Today, I freaked out when I couldn't get my bathroom door open. After ten minutes of panic when thinking about how I'd be stuck there for at least 8 hours until my roommate would get home, and another five mentally going over survival skills, I realized that I had forgotten to unlock the door. FML
by pottyhostage / 11/08/2010 at 4:26pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Miscellaneous
Today, my friend bought a smartphone and updated his facebook status with it. Two weeks ago he signed an apartment lease with another friend. Four months ago he bought a new handgun. Seven months ago he bought a new TV. He's owed me $300 for a year and a half. FML
by Anonymous / 11/08/2010 at 5:47am / United States (New York) / Money
by Anonymous / 11/08/2010 at 4:50am / United States (Oklahoma) / Love
Today, my stalker - an annoying guy who's dedicated the past three years of his life to stalking me at every turn - somehow got a hold of my number and started texting me at 10pm about how I have no life. FML
by nolife / 11/05/2010 at 7:14pm / United States (California) / Love
by Disappointed / 10/31/2010 at 12:06am / United States (New Jersey) / Work
by Anonymous / 10/29/2010 at 8:10pm / United Kingdom (London) / Health
Today, after discussing the side-effects of an insomnia aid, my doctor said that making a choice was naturally a difficult one, and that he would only prescribe it to me once I'd had "a good, long sleep on it". He then laughed out loud and called in the next patient. FML
by royalscenery / 10/27/2010 at 5:58pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by rewarded / 10/20/2010 at 10:33am / India (Delhi) / Work
Today, a guy asked for my number. He used the rather annoying "You know, this iPhone has everything... but you know the only thing that's missing is your number." I might have given it to him, if he did have the iPhone, not the makeshift box of Mini Wheat Thins he had in his hand. FML
by Anonymous / 10/18/2010 at 8:23pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, my doctor confirmed that the extreme pain I've been experiencing is due to a kidney stone. My friend decided this was the time to tell me that passing a kidney stone is the male equivalent of child birth. Hello even more pain. FML
by bjevilcat2 / 10/18/2010 at 2:02pm / United States / Health
by Lauren Smith / 10/17/2010 at 12:52pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, my sister and I were both on Facebook, updating our statuses. I set mine to "just got released from hospital with Baby Lily", as I'd had a baby earlier this week. My sister set hers to "menstrual blood smells like shrimp". Her status got 37 likes. Mine got none. FML
by married / 10/16/2010 at 8:31am / United States (Connecticut) / Love
Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML
by Anonymous / 10/13/2010 at 9:20am / Spain (Asturias) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/12/2010 at 10:09pm / United States (Texas) / Health
by hfksorws / 10/07/2010 at 9:57pm / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, as my girlfriend and I were making out, I slowly took my clothes off and revealed my body to… Today, I learned that you should always make sure the car is in 'park' before you get it on wildly… Today, I heard my mother and father having sexual intercourse, and I found out that my mother moans…