Shadow1368

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Shadow1368

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7086
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Shadow1368's page activity

Visits<b>r0se_bud</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 2:33am<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 12:14am<b>Meriwether</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 4:10pm<b>emmathindra</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 3:35am<b>havahnegila</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 1:01am<b>ZelmaSlayer</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 10:39am<b>romeocool12</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 2:50pm<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 10:21pm<b>jcroisdale</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 5:15pm<b>goawayy</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 7:24am<b>pineapplefuck</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 5:44pm<b>Jiplo</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 5:08pm<b>yulong730</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 10:48pm<b>studentY</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 2:12am<b>Metzler31</b> - the 03/04/2013 at 4:37pm<b>B5B0N35</b> - the 02/05/2013 at 12:20am<b>FaecesOnAStick</b> - the 06/28/2011 at 2:12pm

Shadow1368's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Shadow1368's badges

Shadow1368's favorite FMLs

Today, I freaked out when I couldn't get my bathroom door open. After ten minutes of panic when thinking about how I'd be stuck there for at least 8 hours until my roommate would get home, and another five mentally going over survival skills, I realized that I had forgotten to unlock the door. FML

by pottyhostage / 11/08/2010 at 4:26pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend bought a smartphone and updated his facebook status with it. Two weeks ago he signed an apartment lease with another friend. Four months ago he bought a new handgun. Seven months ago he bought a new TV. He's owed me $300 for a year and a half. FML

by Anonymous / 11/08/2010 at 5:47am / United States (New York) / Money

Today, trying to be cute, I told my soon-to-be husband he was the ying to my yang. He responded with "Baby, you're the Monica Lewinsky to my Bill Clinton." FML

by Anonymous / 11/08/2010 at 4:50am / United States (Oklahoma) / Love

Today, my stalker - an annoying guy who's dedicated the past three years of his life to stalking me at every turn - somehow got a hold of my number and started texting me at 10pm about how I have no life. FML

by nolife / 11/05/2010 at 7:14pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, at school I pulled my bicep muscle arm wrestling. I lost. He was 14. I'm the 23 year old security guard. FML

by Disappointed / 10/31/2010 at 12:06am / United States (New Jersey) / Work

Today, my mother, my aunt, and my two sisters are all on their periods. I can't even brush my teeth in my own house without being treated like a criminal. FML

by Anonymous / 10/29/2010 at 8:10pm / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, after discussing the side-effects of an insomnia aid, my doctor said that making a choice was naturally a difficult one, and that he would only prescribe it to me once I'd had "a good, long sleep on it". He then laughed out loud and called in the next patient. FML

by royalscenery / 10/27/2010 at 5:58pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, for the second time in 5 months I was recognized for my hard work, sincerity and all the adjectives that they use to describe good employees. What was my reward? A piece of chocolate. FML

by rewarded / 10/20/2010 at 10:33am / India (Delhi) / Work

Today, a guy asked for my number. He used the rather annoying "You know, this iPhone has everything... but you know the only thing that's missing is your number." I might have given it to him, if he did have the iPhone, not the makeshift box of Mini Wheat Thins he had in his hand. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2010 at 8:23pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my doctor confirmed that the extreme pain I've been experiencing is due to a kidney stone. My friend decided this was the time to tell me that passing a kidney stone is the male equivalent of child birth. Hello even more pain. FML

by bjevilcat2 / 10/18/2010 at 2:02pm / United States / Health

Today, I came home from work. I was really tired and told my son that I would make him dinner later. He called the cops saying, "Mommy won't feed me." FML

by Lauren Smith / 10/17/2010 at 12:52pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my sister and I were both on Facebook, updating our statuses. I set mine to "just got released from hospital with Baby Lily", as I'd had a baby earlier this week. My sister set hers to "menstrual blood smells like shrimp". Her status got 37 likes. Mine got none. FML

by married / 10/16/2010 at 8:31am / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/13/2010 at 9:20am / Spain (Asturias) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to put my friend's hand in lukewarm water while he was sleeping, to see if he'd pee himself. He woke up and punched me in the face. FML

by Anonymous / 10/12/2010 at 10:09pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I was at Barnes and Noble with my dad, where he refused to buy me a book because I "already read too much." FML

by hfksorws / 10/07/2010 at 9:57pm / Miscellaneous