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Shadow1368

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Shadow1368
  • Town/Country : Canada
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2494
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Shadow1368's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom thought I was flying high on weed and nearly grounded me for it. I wasn't high, I was just actually in a good mood for the first time in a few weeks. FML

#19999290
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18373) - you deserved it (1342)

On 08/02/2012 at 10:14pm - misc - by HappyMan (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my professor snapped and told me that I know nothing, that everything I've ever learned is wrong, and that all of my former teachers should be shot. FML

#17804951
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26031) - you deserved it (4379)

On 09/22/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by failure (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML

#17706108
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32268) - you deserved it (5787) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/09/2011 at 7:18pm - love - by Angie - France

Today, I was mugged by three guys. I fought back, and knocked one down. This made them angry, so they stole my clothes as well. FML

Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML

#17526290
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32000) - you deserved it (4348)

On 08/20/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by W1D0 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got my tongue pierced, then went to a pet store. A clerk came up to ask if I needed help. I showed him I already had some fish, and said, "No thanks." He must have thought I was "special," as he bent down and in a baby voice, said "You got fishy? FISHY FISHY FISHY!" while poking the bag. FML

#17497586
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22120) - you deserved it (10492)

On 08/17/2011 at 4:13am - misc - by aprilfools22 - United States (California)

Today, I was propositioned by an incredibly pretty girl. I'm a 24 year old virgin; she's my best mate's girlfriend. She tells him everything when drunk, and he's a black-belt in karate. This could officially be classified as torture. FML

#17012885
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31623) - you deserved it (5237)

On 07/07/2011 at 10:40am - love - by Junktown (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, my mom got drunk and told me to leave the house because "I've been mooching off her for too long". I'm 14 and now am sleeping at my friends house. FML

#16845946
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37207) - you deserved it (1945)

On 06/25/2011 at 3:47am - misc - by thatguy - Canada

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is extremely jealous of a stuffed toy that sits on my bed, all because it gets to 'sleep in the same bed as me and he doesn't.' Now, whenever he comes over, he throws it at the wall, death glares at it, then gets up and kicks it under my bed. FML

#16774144
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35052) - you deserved it (11391)

On 06/21/2011 at 12:46am - love - by holdengurl18 - China

Today, I had to pick my parents up from jail. They thought it would be okay to have sex behind a bush. FML

#16761961
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44344) - you deserved it (3683)

On 06/20/2011 at 11:57am - intimacy - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to go to a birthday party for 10 year old triplets. They've all been dead for more than 9 years. FML

#16755181
383 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38258) - you deserved it (5830)

On 06/20/2011 at 12:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to jump in the pool while holding my cat. I am currently in the hospital due to the severe cuts on my face and throat. FML

#16725871
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8871) - you deserved it (96299)

On 06/18/2011 at 6:32am - health - by princev - United States

Today, I was about to make love to my girlfriend at the local park when a cop caught us. I had to give him our information and hold a conversation with "Fire and Ice" lubricant on my penis. FML

#16724592
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13638) - you deserved it (50516)

On 06/18/2011 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Khrixas_069 - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to NYPD detectives banging on my door with flashlights, looking for some criminal who used to live in my house. Apparently, when they showed the man's mugshot to my neighbors upstairs, for some reason they identified the man as my husband. FML

#16708517
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28295) - you deserved it (2417)

On 06/17/2011 at 7:06am - love - by ari - United States

Today, I woke up to a burglar holding a gun. He yelled at me to get up so I did. He then paused and laughed. I was sleeping naked. FML

#16689352
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42913) - you deserved it (5851)

On 06/16/2011 at 1:42am - misc - by mike oxsmall - United States



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