Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SexySlayer1248

Offline (the 02/17/2015 at 12:40pm) | Search for a member

SexySlayer1248

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 25 June 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10336
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 6 posted

About SexySlayer1248 : I did my time in the army, my MOS was military police, now I'm in college for a nursing major.
And yes this is my real picture, if it was fake don't you think I would choose someone a lot more attractive

SexySlayer1248's page activity

Visits<b>Micheal23</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 10:26am<b>JoshNotWright</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 9:02am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 6:57pm<b>rootbeer42</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 10:13am<b>Mukuro</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 5:09pm<b>PinkiePiePony</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 7:20pm<b>jezzilla</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 1:44pm<b>bananassin</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 1:40pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 8:36am<b>PresAgent</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 12:45am<b>jorrock97</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 10:55pm<b>myagi</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 8:03am<b>Capriciousfox</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 10:12pm<b>claudio87</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 7:34pm<b>abattior</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 11:00pm<b>sleepwalker13</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 8:48pm<b>jayeterror775</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:27am<b>rhiannon1030</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 1:09pm

SexySlayer1248's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of SexySlayer1248's badges

SexySlayer1248's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to dinner to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I received a text message, so I pulled out my phone to check. Apparently, his parents have a "No phone at the table rule" and took my phone away until I can learn "proper table manners." FML

#18542598
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16411) - you deserved it (42354)

On 12/18/2011 at 4:59am - misc - by grounded - United States (Texas)

Today, after staying up all night with an excruciating headache, it finally went away. I crawled into bed and snuggled up to my husband only to have him shift positions and elbow me right in the head. FML

#18534039
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28012) - you deserved it (2816)

On 12/17/2011 at 6:09am - health - by wideawakeandinpain - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML

#18467751
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44048) - you deserved it (5361)

On 12/09/2011 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Aly (woman) - United States

Today, I found that when a hot girl asks you whether you have a girlfriend, saying, "I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one" is not the best way to proceed. FML

#18442495
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9957) - you deserved it (67496)

On 12/06/2011 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my house was broken into. How? My mom left a key under a flower pot on the porch. She also left a note on the door saying so. He stole all of my guitars. FML

#18404759
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31699) - you deserved it (2341)

On 12/01/2011 at 5:00pm - misc - by Aaron -

Today, my boyfriend went and bought Skyrim, Modern Warfare 3 and renewed his WoW subscription. Looks like I won't be getting laid for a month or two. FML

#18273262
601 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44459) - you deserved it (11620)

On 11/17/2011 at 3:22pm - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

#18022495
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52094) - you deserved it (16618)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend informed me that to save money, he's been using the same condom for the last month. FML

#17974807
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49433) - you deserved it (5602)

On 10/13/2011 at 12:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

#17953738
431 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34674) - you deserved it (24668)

On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85739) - you deserved it (13156)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85739) - you deserved it (13156)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I found out that my neighbors took it upon themselves to knock down the fence we shared, and putting up a new one. Thus fencing my pool into their yard. When I asked them why, he replied, "We thought you weren't coming back." I was gone for 4 months tending to my sister with breast cancer. FML

#17658715
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41804) - you deserved it (2164)

On 09/04/2011 at 2:09am - misc - by Pool-less - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was at the bar with a date. My date made a joke about me being a slow drinker, so I tried to impress her by chugging the rest of my glass. She was impressed with how fast I chugged my beer, until it came back up. FML

#17651078
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8675) - you deserved it (38222)

On 09/03/2011 at 5:24am - misc - by ol faithful (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, it was my engagement party. All was going fabulously until my fiancé's dad decided to give us a toast, and completely forgot my name in front of all my family and friends. I've been with his son for 7 years. FML

#17475917
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30673) - you deserved it (2717)

On 08/15/2011 at 12:16am - love - by Alex (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my roommate and I got into an argument. He told me he understood if I didn't forgive him "for a couple of days." He'd confessed to undressing my girlfriend in her sleep. FML

#17447904
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36324) - you deserved it (2665)

On 08/12/2011 at 3:54am - intimacy - by James (man) - United States (Washington)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: