SexySlayer1248

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Offline (the 09/23/2016 at 4:28am)

SexySlayer1248

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 25 June 1988 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 16036
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 7 posted

About SexySlayer1248 : I did my time in the army, my MOS was military police, now I'm in college for a nursing major.
And yes this is my real picture, if it was fake don't you think I would choose someone a lot more attractive

SexySlayer1248's page activity

Visits<b>stryder9090</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 11:10am<b>duduv2</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 3:16am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 08/29/2016 at 10:29am<b>tatteredshirt</b> - the 08/20/2016 at 4:37am<b>Willman757</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 7:31am<b>pred8885</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 9:46am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 6:16am<b>chewsef</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 1:00am<b>crudeandrudeguy</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 12:52am<b>BananEnigma</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 8:03am<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 3:41pm<b>Jayroc</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 2:58pm<b>raven83</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 8:55am<b>gopi</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 5:43pm<b>shaobi</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 10:36pm<b>rhiannon1030</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 2:57pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 1:00am<b>thor21mjolnir</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 4:45am

Fucked!<b>tin_cup</b> - the 08/29/2016 at 4:30pm<b>Jayroc</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 4:00pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 6:04am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 1:44am<b>jelrid</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 3:46am

SexySlayer1248's FML badges

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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SexySlayer1248's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my future mother-in-law. All went well; she complimented my dress, and I complimented her haircut. Then she and her son had a screaming match over how our children will be fat because of their mother. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2014 at 12:49am / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, a crazy woman grabbed my hair and mentioned how lovely it was. She then asked when I would donate it. I told her I didn't want to, at which point she started yelling that she was going to get some scissors and cut it all off to teach me a lesson. FML

by donttouchmyhair / 03/19/2014 at 2:14pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Miscellaneous

Today, a lady who works for my husband confided in me that they've been sleeping with each other and now she's pregnant. She didn't know I was his wife. FML

by naesha / 03/16/2014 at 9:40pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my friends hired a male stripper to give me a lap dance for my birthday. It was all pretty nice until he let rip one of the most nauseating farts I've ever encountered, right in my face. Hours later, I can still smell it. FML

by polebitch49 / 03/14/2014 at 4:45pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, in the middle of a Spanish oral exam, I start to panic. My teacher suggests I say whatever pops into my head. I blurt out, "Heeey Macarena!" FML

by LeChameauTrisomique / 03/14/2014 at 12:33am / France (Centre) / Work

Today, I asked my grandmother what she looked like when she was young. She casually replied, "I was ugly, sweetie. Just like you." FML

by Anonymous / 03/07/2014 at 1:25pm / Philippines (Quezon City) / Miscellaneous

Today, my students presented their projects on genetics to the rest of the class. One student told the class that salted and unsalted peanuts were an example of genetic variation. She was serious. FML

by Biologyfacepalm / 03/03/2014 at 2:58pm / United States / Work

Today, I went on a date with a girl my friend set me up with. I thought we got along great, until after dessert, when I asked if she'd be interested in doing this again. She just said, "Nahhh" then got up and casually left, stiffing me on the bill. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2014 at 1:46pm / United States (California) / Money

Today, my friends convinced me to go out clubbing with them for the first time. "You'll get some action", they said. The only action I got was some drunk bloke staggering into me and spraying me with vomit just minutes after arriving. FML

by thanks, cunt-o / 03/01/2014 at 12:23pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my husband to give our dog a bath while I was at work. When I returned home, I found my dog, along with my husband, in the bath together. FML

by lacy / 03/01/2014 at 3:23am / United States (Kentucky) / Animals

Today, I met my boyfriend's adoptive family. There was his mom and several brothers, one of whom tried to hit on me. They tried to convince my boyfriend to break up with me, and his mom told me I'll probably get knocked up by the brother who hit on me. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2014 at 1:09am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I called a company for a problem with our septic tank. Two workers show up, I take them into the garden to show them the manhole cover at the top of it. They open it up. We then gaze upon a sea of condoms floating on the surface. My wife and I don't use condoms. FML

by Maxime / 02/27/2014 at 7:32pm / Love

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

by well SHIT / 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take our relationship to the next level. I assumed since we live together that he meant marriage. I was wrong; the next level is me jacking him off with my feet. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2014 at 12:29pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was feeling really good about myself for running and walking everywhere so much so that I was out of breath and panting. Well, until I remembered that I was playing a video game and it was my character that was doing the running around that is. FML

by Tomb Raider Wannabe / 02/17/2014 at 8:57pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Health