About SexySlayer1248 : I did my time in the army, my MOS was military police, now I'm in college for with a nursing major
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Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15524) - you deserved it (8249)
On 09/21/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by RawrSparkle (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I realized just how bad my 28-year-old husband's gamer rage is when I came home to a smashed TV. This is the second TV in three months that he's destroyed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14801) - you deserved it (2676)
On 09/20/2012 at 8:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my daughter and her boyfriend excitedly told me that after months of trying they are finally pregnant and that I'm going to be a grandmother. This would be great news if they weren't 15. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35386) - you deserved it (4572)
On 09/18/2012 at 4:20pm - health - by GMD (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)
Today, my boyfriend and I had breakfast with his grandmother. She told him how I'm prettier than "that Mexican" he'd brought home for dinner last week. We had dinner with her last week, and I'm that same Mexican. She then went on to how Mexicans are what's wrong with the economy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20027) - you deserved it (1844)
On 09/14/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by MexicanMe (woman) - United States
Today, I learned I'm not allergic to gluten. My mom has kept me on a gluten free diet since I was 5. She was convinced I was allergic to it. I'm 25 and I am writing this over my first slice of pizza in 20 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25712) - you deserved it (1405)
On 09/04/2012 at 5:38pm - health - by Emma - United States (Missouri)
Today, I'm quite ill. My new step-mother believes that the genetic wheat allergy I got from my mother would have gone away since she's now married to my father instead. Looks like dad picked a winner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20938) - you deserved it (953)
On 09/04/2012 at 4:53am - misc - by hooligyn123 - United States
Today, I received a call from my future sister in-law, telling me that she and her future husband had decided to hold their wedding ceremony on my birthday. I was told not to celebrate my birthday, as it would "take away the attention to the true meaning of the day." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24593) - you deserved it (1121)
On 08/29/2012 at 1:32am - love - by SuzyTurquoiseBlu (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I announced to my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He immediately denied that it was his because "a childhood accident" supposedly left him sterile. He has a child from a previous relationship. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18757) - you deserved it (3790)
On 08/28/2012 at 7:08pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I had to bail on yet another date with an awesome guy. Every time I make a date, my hateful mother slips laxatives into my food so I'm glued to the shitter until 2am. This is the fourth time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24478) - you deserved it (2349)
On 08/19/2012 at 11:53pm - love - by Lauren - United States (Iowa)
Today, after years of bad blood, my husband decided to invite his parents to dinner. After making rude remarks about my pregnancy, his dad eventually muttered that I'm a slut. My husband punched him, his wife called the police, and now I'm all alone while he sits in a jail cell for battery. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21202) - you deserved it (1049)
On 08/19/2012 at 7:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)
Today, I had to finally accept that my husband is too large for me. Normally, it'd be a bragging point, except my private parts can't handle it. After several infections brought on after vaginal tearing, I'm having to choose between being in perpetual pain, or giving up my sex life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38124) - you deserved it (2636)
On 08/18/2012 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by sal (woman) - United States (Idaho)
Today, I found out that my new husband is expecting two children: ours, due in January, and our 16-year-old neighbor's, due in March. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48955) - you deserved it (2183)
On 08/18/2012 at 1:09am - misc - by Just_Me_88 - United States (Oregon)
Today, I went out to dinner with my boyfriend and his mom. The hostess asked if I needed "the kid's menu," remarked how I look "so grown up for your age," and asked what grade I was in. I said I'm in university. She laughed as if it was the best joke ever told. I'm 22. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19758) - you deserved it (1023)
On 08/14/2012 at 12:52pm - misc - by ugh (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. He now argues that he should keep the dog. We only dated for three months, and I've had the dog since I was ten. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26688) - you deserved it (1356)
On 08/14/2012 at 5:06am - love - by cclllc (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, it's my birthday. Today is also the day my grandma died, six years ago. Since then, I get to sit through any sort of attempted celebration while my mom sobs and drinks herself into a stupor in the background. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18277) - you deserved it (866)
On 08/14/2012 at 3:57am - misc - by BirthdayFail (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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