Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SexySlayer1248

Offline (58 minutes ago) | Search for a member

SexySlayer1248

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 25 June 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5626
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 5 posted

About SexySlayer1248 : I did my time in the army, my MOS was military police, now I'm in college for a nursing major.
And yes this is my real picture, if it was fake don't you think I would choose someone a lot more attractive

SexySlayer1248's page activity

Visits<b>jayeterror775</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:27am<b>rhiannon1030</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 1:09pm<b>Anarchy66</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 2:45am<b>Gmoney12</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:54pm<b>LuisFV</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 4:29pm<b>djsammyc</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 10:08pm<b>KatlynBrooke</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 2:39am<b>I_Am_Lamp_</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 11:09am<b>madmaddi147</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 9:07pm<b>hotbutthurttoast</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 5:06pm<b>kkong343</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 11:19am<b>khaoticpanda</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 3:45pm<b>greaterdane</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 11:05pm<b>Gregshelton8611</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 8:29pm<b>truth_seeker</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 10:59pm<b>Black_Knight80</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 9:26pm<b>dragonf1y</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 1:56pm<b>l99</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 11:11pm

SexySlayer1248's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of SexySlayer1248's badges

SexySlayer1248's favorite FMLs

Today, my father gave me his blessing to be married on one condition: that I keep my maiden name when I marry. My fiancé thought it would be "epic". My last name will be hyphenated to Cobb-Webb. FML

#20509329
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31903) - you deserved it (5453)

On 02/16/2013 at 10:27am - love - by MsCobb - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was walking to my dorm room while it was snowing heavily. I saw a girl in a wheelchair trying to get up a slippery incline. Being a good person, I asked to help. I'm a pretty weak guy, and I couldn't push her up. She wheeled away crying because she thought she was fat. FML

#20504485
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35154) - you deserved it (5401)

On 02/12/2013 at 11:57pm - misc - by IMadeAHandicappedPersonCry - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my maid of honor, who offered to take care of my wedding dress before the D-Day, left it near her open window during heavy rain. My dress is now ruined, and she's backed out due to stress. I'm supposed to be getting married tomorrow. FML

#20503604
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32673) - you deserved it (3233)

On 02/12/2013 at 12:41pm - misc - by Meaghan (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, while waiting for my order at a restaurant, a woman walked up to me and slapped me. She looked at me for a moment and said "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Ten minutes later, the same woman came back and slapped me again. FML

#20502782
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32269) - you deserved it (2387)

On 02/11/2013 at 8:42pm - misc - by Target - United States

Today, my dog ate a whole case of my son's paintballs, because apparently they are made of a fish bi-product. Not only does the whole house smell like fish, there are countless bright yellow dog turds all over the house and our yard. FML

#20502144
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31618) - you deserved it (3921)

On 02/11/2013 at 10:48am - animals - by firestar772 - United States (California)

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

#20502122
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29512) - you deserved it (27373)

On 02/11/2013 at 10:26am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I watched The Passion of the Christ with my girlfriend. She kept scoffing at what she called the "historical inaccuracies", and actually tried to convince me that Hitler killed Jesus. When I corrected her, she looked at me, mouth agape, as if I was insane. FML

#20498635
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31438) - you deserved it (4629)

On 02/08/2013 at 7:44pm - love - by and she doesn't even give bjs (man) - Argentina (Distrito Federal)

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML

#20497837
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57306) - you deserved it (10856)

On 02/08/2013 at 2:13am - intimacy - by mydadsgonnakillme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I pointed out to my boyfriend how Valentine's day, my birthday, and our one-year anniversary were all coming up in the next few weeks. He then promptly broke up with me. FML

#20497809
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34387) - you deserved it (8209)

On 02/08/2013 at 1:24am - love - by katelynm - United States

Today, I bought a fish. I put the tank on top of the fridge so my cat wouldn't get at it. I'd forgotten to buy some things for its tank, so I quickly ran out to get them. When I got home, I saw the tank destroyed on the floor, and my cat devouring my fish. I had the fish for less than an hour. FML

#20497647
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16340) - you deserved it (25807)

On 02/07/2013 at 10:58pm - animals - by fish killer - Canada

Today, my husband started a conversation with, "In Pokémon" and ended the same conversation with "and that's why we should divorce." FML

#20495499
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43117) - you deserved it (4013)

On 02/06/2013 at 8:38am - love - by PokeWife (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my son threw the biggest fit in history about going to the dentist. He broke a whole stack of plates, overflowed the bathtub, let the dog loose, and kicked his father when he tried to calm him down. My son is 17. FML

#20495428
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29836) - you deserved it (31771)

On 02/06/2013 at 6:12am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband decided to start seeing other people. I found out when I called and interrupted his date. FML

#20495369
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34010) - you deserved it (2228)

On 02/06/2013 at 3:04am - love - by MyLife (woman) -

Today, my boyfriend called me a freak for wanting to have sex for a second night in a row. FML

#20495286
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47329) - you deserved it (5473)

On 02/06/2013 at 1:01am - intimacy - by frustrated! (woman) - United States

Today, I attended my first surgery as part of my program at med school. I found out that when I see someone's intestines, I vomit. Even if I'm still wearing a surgical mask. There goes the thousands of dollars I spent on college. FML

#20495058
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27980) - you deserved it (5967)

On 02/05/2013 at 10:08pm - health - by A troubled ex med school student - United States (Ohio)



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: