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SexySlayer1248

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SexySlayer1248
  • Town/Country : Sacramento, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 25 June 1988 (25 years)
  • Number of visits : 3104
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 5 posted

About SexySlayer1248 : I did my time in the army, my MOS was military police, now I'm in college for a nursing major.
And yes this is my real picture, if it was fake don't you think I would choose someone a lot more attractive

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SexySlayer1248's favorite FMLs

Today, what started as a fun family Easter egg hunt turned within minutes into my mother-in-law's big chance to be a dramatic cow by screaming at my 5 and 7-year-old daughters for participating in a "vile pagan ritual" and saying that we're all going to hell. They're still bawling. FML

#20568650
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31490) - you deserved it (2046)

On 03/31/2013 at 4:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML

#20568124
310 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39644) - you deserved it (3305)

On 03/31/2013 at 9:32am - kids - by The_Black_Jesus - United States

Today, I learned that my parents are planning to divorce. My dad said, "I'll take Rachel." Rachel isn't even his daughter; I am. Rachel is my mom's daughter with her first husband. FML

#20567711
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34024) - you deserved it (2210)

On 03/31/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML

#20565460
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43075) - you deserved it (14702)

On 03/29/2013 at 1:18pm - misc - by fucked by sex ed (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

#20562846
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70625) - you deserved it (6034)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my husband called me, saying he was in the hospital with a friend who'd just broken his arm. Too bad I then heard a female voice in the background mutter, "She'll never buy that". FML

#20562542
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50444) - you deserved it (3364)

On 03/27/2013 at 3:55pm - love - by soontobesingle (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, my daughter got selected to pick music for a funeral. She only listens to Nikki Minaj. FML

#20560709
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30353) - you deserved it (3621)

On 03/26/2013 at 7:40am - kids - by bear - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, whilst texting my boyfriend on the train, I noticed the woman sitting next to me staring intently at my phone. After letting my boyfriend know, he sent a message saying, "Are we gonna involve the dog again? Last night was fun." She gasped and screamed that I'm a "twisted dog-humping bitch." FML

#20560035
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35473) - you deserved it (6312)

On 03/25/2013 at 8:28pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, during a sex ed lesson, we were given a lecture on pregnancy and abortion from the school nurse. Throughout the session she kept repeating, "Of course, Sophie knows ALL about this." The nurse happens to know that my dad's a gynaecologist. That's not what everyone else in the year thinks. FML

#20559804
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36394) - you deserved it (1635)

On 03/25/2013 at 5:53pm - misc - by Soph (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I was yelled at by a customer because I wouldn't give her a new iPhone 5 for free to replace her broken Nokia, which she threw out the window in "blind rage". I felt awful having to thank her for calling. Sadly, this is a daily event. FML

#20559802
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28323) - you deserved it (2135)

On 03/25/2013 at 5:53pm - work - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Friesland)

Today, at a romantic dinner my boyfriend was treating me to, the waiter brought a "Will you marry me?" cake out with candles and sparklers. I probably should have checked that they'd brought it to the right table before dramatically screaming "Yes!" and jumping into my boyfriend's arms. They hadn't. FML

#20559787
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34141) - you deserved it (6046)

On 03/25/2013 at 5:45pm - love - by franky (woman) - Germany (Niedersachsen)

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend of seven years. He stared at me, then said "Yeah, okay then. I'm gonna watch TV now." He then turned on the TV and watched Top Gun. Not quite the response I was hoping for. FML

#20556604
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18656) - you deserved it (35068)

On 03/23/2013 at 3:00pm - love - by Jessica (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML

#20556205
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38491) - you deserved it (2838)

On 03/23/2013 at 9:25am - kids - by kindergarten teacher - United States (California)

Today, while making love to my boyfriend for the first time, I moaned his name. He freaked out over how I wasn't over my ex, and angrily left. They have the same name. FML

#20555878
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50888) - you deserved it (7587)

On 03/23/2013 at 12:43am - intimacy - by nraecher (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my psycho abstinence-only sex ed teacher claimed condoms give 50% protection at most against pregnancy. I couldn't help but correct her. She apologized for her "mistake", saying, "It's just that we're not ALL sluts, Kara." Now everyone thinks I'm a raging whore. FML

#20555528
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35488) - you deserved it (5266)

On 03/22/2013 at 8:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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