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Serafie

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Serafie
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 24526
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

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Today, my girlfriend and I were both at home, sick. We decided to make the best of it and spent the day in bed together. Things got a little steamy, and we started making out. As I started kissing her neck, I got nauseous. Before I could pull away, I threw up all over her. FML

#18047798
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27176) - you deserved it (15491)

On 10/22/2011 at 5:51pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Northwest Territories)

Today, I was giving a PowerPoint presentation in class. When I put my flash drive into the computer, my folder opened up and a nude picture of myself popped right up on a 110 inch projector screen for all 35 students to see. This is a 16 week course. FML

#18044835
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13705) - you deserved it (55158)

On 10/22/2011 at 9:25am - misc - by jaymash - United States (Michigan)

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

#18041933
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15441) - you deserved it (43158) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Virginiedetibo - France

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After we finished, he went under the covers and started touching me. At first I thought he was trying to give me "oral pleasure". It turns out he lost the condom inside of me and was trying to fish it out before I noticed. FML

Today, I came home crying and informed my mother that someone had called me a 'fat bitch' today. She held me at arms length, looked me straight in the eyes, and lovingly said, "You can't change who you are." FML

#18030878
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28087) - you deserved it (5573)

On 10/20/2011 at 12:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - Ireland (Meath)

Today, my sister finally broke down and told me that our dad gambled away of all my college savings, and I would have to pay for school the best way I can. They have known for months, and when I asked why nobody told me, the reply was, "You're a college boy, we thought you would figure it out." FML

#18030723
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25509) - you deserved it (1820)

On 10/20/2011 at 11:39am - money - by FATS DOMINO (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has been "single" on numerous occasions during our 9 month relationship. FML

#18029239
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24752) - you deserved it (2295)

On 10/20/2011 at 2:56am - intimacy - by SpikeStanley - United States

Today, this weird girl started texting me. I really didn't want to talk to her, so I texted back, "This message could not be delivered because of a temporery network setup error. Error 2128-226110." She replied, "You spelt temporary wrong." FML

#18026685
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9557) - you deserved it (57322)

On 10/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by tommyboy783 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I learned that the only reason most of my students come to lecture is that they have a running bet on how many times I say "OK" in two hours. It was 137 last week. FML

#18025254
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20220) - you deserved it (8610)

On 10/19/2011 at 6:42pm - work - by Habit - United Kingdom (Leeds)

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

#17985302
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29149) - you deserved it (5021) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm - misc - by adieuvelib - France

Today, I have been pissing blood for 2 hours, ever since some douche in a Nixon mask ran up and slugged me in the kidney. FML

#17981728
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30572) - you deserved it (1944)

On 10/14/2011 at 11:09am - health - by Nixontones - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to the free clinic down the street to prove to my girlfriend I don't have any STDs so that we can finally have sex. Turns out I have one. FML

#17979790
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17094) - you deserved it (47626)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:30am - intimacy - by happybudiess - United States

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

#17977094
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60229) - you deserved it (2953)

On 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm - love - by Good sister (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I awoke to rose petals leading me to the front garden. Curious, I followed them, thinking my boyfriend planned something romantic. As I walked out the door, I was hit in the face with a paper plate full of whipped cream and sprinkles, and then locked outside. FML

#17975450
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29101) - you deserved it (3626)

On 10/13/2011 at 3:20pm - love - by Eet- (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, my boyfriend informed me that to save money, he's been using the same condom for the last month. FML

#17974807
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46508) - you deserved it (5305)

On 10/13/2011 at 12:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States



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