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Self_Reliant

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Self_Reliant

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Self_ReliantSelf_Reliant
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 16 April 1986 (29 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1428
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Self_Reliant : Live. Laugh. Love. Learn.

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Self_Reliant's favorite FMLs

Today, the 4-year-old I was babysitting came up to me all happy, saying she went to the bathroom like a "big girl". Knowing she was just potty trained, I asked if she'd remembered to flush. Looking at me confused, she said, "But it's in my room." FML

#21424205
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26521) - you deserved it (2063)

On 06/10/2015 at 11:04pm - kids - by AdoKitty (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I broke the news to my 10-year-old son that in about 8 months, he'll have a baby brother or sister. I knew he never wanted a sibling, but I didn't expect him to throw a tantrum, then look at me through teary eyes and scream, "Why can't you keep your fucking legs closed?" FML

#21423894
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36067) - you deserved it (7553)

On 06/10/2015 at 12:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML

#21421662
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27505) - you deserved it (8552)

On 06/06/2015 at 5:11am - misc - by lehonX9 (man) - Germany (Niedersachsen)

Today, at a party I got blind drunk and I gave a guy a blowjob for the first time. I'm a 100% heterosexual male. FML

#21406764
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20658) - you deserved it (38071)

On 05/08/2015 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - India (Delhi)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML

#21399378
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32617) - you deserved it (2793)

On 04/25/2015 at 6:34am - love - by a critically injured shitehawk (man) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I thought my dad was finally showing interest in the business I started last year when he asked about my next event. Nope, he just wanted to know if I would hire his step-granddaughter. Her first question: "So, I won't have to do any like, real work right?" Gee, thanks Dad. FML

#21393221
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27199) - you deserved it (2108)

On 04/13/2015 at 9:50pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I ran into the woman who hit my car and drove off three days ago. She was my bank teller. I called 911; she pressed the silent alarm. Guess whose story the cops believed. FML

#21392789
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36391) - you deserved it (2582)

On 04/13/2015 at 5:00am - misc - by yupthissucks - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was asked to prom by the same guy who "accidentally" cut off a chunk of my hair in class and with whom I haven't had a conversation in my life. When I politely declined he said, "You'll regret this". FML

#21392030
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30741) - you deserved it (2312)

On 04/11/2015 at 9:53pm - misc - by scared4myhair - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had a date over for the first time since I moved out. I made a beautiful dinner… for one of us. I'm so used to cooking for just myself that I only made one serving. FML

#21387713
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28341) - you deserved it (10105)

On 04/04/2015 at 8:44pm - love - by :/ - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was let go from my internship for "not putting in enough effort". I was working 50 hours a week for almost zero pay. FML

#21386456
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30654) - you deserved it (2279)

On 04/02/2015 at 10:48am - work - by Wellfu (woman) - Europe

Today, at the DMV I was told I had to prove, with a doctor's note, that I was an amputee and my disability was permanent to get my placard. Apparently, setting my prosthetic leg on the counter wasn't proof enough, and is considered "threatening". The police were called. FML

#21386342
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38691) - you deserved it (2091)

On 04/02/2015 at 2:43am - health - by usadisvet (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my parents walked in on me, having sex. No, I wasn't having sex. They were. FML

#21384025
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39502) - you deserved it (3520)

On 03/30/2015 at 6:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my husband was involved in a horrible series of accidents; he repeatedly slipped and fell into my best friend's vagina. FML

#21382840
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45989) - you deserved it (3357)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:20am - intimacy - by soontobewidow (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, I managed to take an entire shower without realizing my socks were on. I washed my feet. FML

#21382179
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23533) - you deserved it (9335)

On 03/26/2015 at 11:28pm - misc - by comfort_ - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was talking about an essay I'd written for a class that was due to be turned in online days ago. I thought mine was well written and I'd even finished it a couple of days early so I wouldn't forget about it. After a few minutes of talking and feeling proud, I realized that I forgot to turn it in. FML



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