Selaphia

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Selaphia

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7276
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Selaphia's page activity

Visits<b>RHOPKINS13</b> - the 10/17/2009 at 1:19pm<b>depinaariana</b> - the 07/09/2009 at 8:12am

Selaphia's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Selaphia's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to wait outside Starbucks. While standing, I started day dreaming and didn't notice I had been staring at a table beside the window for a long time. Suddenly, someone went up to me and said "Try not to be so obvious". Sitting at the table was a girl with a huge cleavage. FML

by lifedoessuck12 / 07/19/2009 at 10:13am / Philippines (Pasay) / Miscellaneous

Today, after not seeing my boyfriend for 9 months, he came to meet me at the airport. I was so excited when I first saw him that I broke into a sprint to greet him. Apparently, running through the airport looks suspicious, because a security guard tackled me. Now I have a broken nose. FML

by Anonymous / 07/19/2009 at 9:49am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, after not seeing my boyfriend for 9 months, he came to meet me at the airport. I was so excited when I first saw him that I broke into a sprint to greet him. Apparently, running through the airport looks suspicious, because a security guard tackled me. Now I have a broken nose. FML

by Anonymous / 07/19/2009 at 9:49am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, after not seeing my boyfriend for 9 months, he came to meet me at the airport. I was so excited when I first saw him that I broke into a sprint to greet him. Apparently, running through the airport looks suspicious, because a security guard tackled me. Now I have a broken nose. FML

by Anonymous / 07/19/2009 at 9:49am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a Starbucks drive-thru and was grabbing a hot coffee when I got rear ended and my car hit the vehicle in front of me which deployed my airbag. Hot coffee can really burn when it hits your face at a high rate of speed. FML

by coffeeburns / 07/19/2009 at 3:25am / United States / Transportation

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. As I left his house and began to drive away, I see him chasing after my car barefoot. I stop and roll down the window, ready to listen to the speech he has prepared to win me over with. He takes a moment to catch his breath and says "I want my cellphone back". FML

by DramaQueen / 07/19/2009 at 2:45am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. As I left his house and began to drive away, I see him chasing after my car barefoot. I stop and roll down the window, ready to listen to the speech he has prepared to win me over with. He takes a moment to catch his breath and says "I want my cellphone back". FML

by DramaQueen / 07/19/2009 at 2:45am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I got sick in the airsick bag as my flight landed. The woman next to me, trying to make me feel better, says "Don't handle landings too well?" I responded "No, I actually fly fine, I'm just 8 weeks pregnant." She looked at my left hand, noticed no ring, rolled her eyes and looked away. FML

by preggersss / 07/18/2009 at 10:27pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

by harrysolo / 07/18/2009 at 9:26pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I used a public bathroom. I hung my purse up on the hook on the door. Two minutes later, a hand reaches over the door and steals my purse. I got robbed while taking a crap. FML

by xobeachbabi428ox / 07/18/2009 at 6:32pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I proudly informed my boyfriend that I am now a size 4, down from an 18, after months of dieting and exercising after he told me he would like me to be a size 6. He broke up with me for "not listening to what he wanted" and "being an overachiever". FML

by overachiever / 07/18/2009 at 5:35pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. On our way to the Space Needle I was pulled over and promptly arrested. Apparently, I had recently purchased a car from a man who had robbed a jewelery store. The ring is now evidence. FML

by diamondsareforever / 07/18/2009 at 4:19pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I was out to dinner with a friend. When the bill came with a customer satisfaction survey, I put honestly that the "server friendliness" was "below average." Ten minutes later, I had to return to the restaurant to beg the waitress for my keys, which I had left on the table. FML

by lemonadedisguise / 07/18/2009 at 1:14pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my driver's license was suspended last year for a DUI ticket that wasn't paid. Apparently, someone had used my identity info to avoid the ticket on their record. The cops showed me the guy's picture taken when he was arrested. It was my brother. FML

Today, I was pulled over for speeding. I speak 4 languages and thought if I spoke French, the Officer would let me off with a warning thinking I was a tourist. Afterwards I turned to my wife and said "I can't believe that worked." He was a few feet away and heard. FML

by Anonymous / 07/17/2009 at 6:40pm / United States (Washington) / Transportation