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ScubaSteve620

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ScubaSteve620

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  • Number of visits : 90
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ScubaSteve620's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband discovered poking me in my belly button makes me have to pee, sometimes it's uncontrollable and happens immediately. He thinks it's hilarious and decided it's his new favorite game. FML

#20186585
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25756) - you deserved it (2580)

On 12/01/2012 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML

#20132312
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23841) - you deserved it (16481)

On 10/25/2012 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend requested that I shave my lips so I spent an hour in the shower carefully removing every trace of pubic hair. Turns out he wanted me to shave my moustache, not my carpet. FML

#20062588
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13327) - you deserved it (28763)

On 09/08/2012 at 12:03am - intimacy - by sasquatch (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my five-year-old daughter told me she was going to throw up. I told her to rush to the bathroom. I followed her a few seconds later, only to find her sitting on the toilet and vomiting onto the floor. FML

#18534964
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31511) - you deserved it (5881) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/17/2011 at 10:42am - kids - by espylone - France

Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML

#18070582
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27029) - you deserved it (32407)

On 10/25/2011 at 6:15am - intimacy - by sad - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because apparently my mom hates him and doesn't want us to be together. My mom died six years ago. FML

#17019799
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44466) - you deserved it (2788)

On 07/07/2011 at 9:28pm - love - by anonbob (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my wife actually had the balls to tell me that we can't have sex for the rest of her nine month pregnancy, because according to her, "I don't want twins." FML

#17004643
391 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39770) - you deserved it (10810)

On 07/06/2011 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend gets a nose bleed every time he orgasms. FML

#16322512
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37660) - you deserved it (3976)

On 05/24/2011 at 12:27am - intimacy - by nr1234 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband and I had just got over a big argument, and I asked him to cut me some cucumbers for my eyes to help me relax. I was laying down, eyed closed, and he set them on my eyes. They weren't cucumbers, they were lemons. FML

#16304417
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21151) - you deserved it (42380)

On 05/22/2011 at 9:58pm - misc - by lemonhead -

Today, I asked my husband, of only a year, why we don't have sex anymore. He said it's because he masturbates. When I asked how often he did it, he replied "Every day that we don't have sex..." FML

#16277359
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32370) - you deserved it (8920)

On 05/21/2011 at 3:18am - intimacy - by btswc - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I learned the only job that actually wants me is as a peanut butter factory worker. I've been unemployed for 9 months. I'm also allergic to nuts. FML

#15931079
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30580) - you deserved it (3309)

On 04/26/2011 at 3:49am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend, who's on a diet, refused to give me a blow job because my sperm would "add useless calories" to her day. FML

#14677100
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36110) - you deserved it (13270)

On 01/22/2011 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I took my two-year-old daughter swimming. While sitting in the hot tub, my daughter pointed to the elderly man sitting across from us and mumbled something. I couldn't understand her, so I asked her to repeat it. After two more attempts, she shouted, "MOM! He has big boobs!" FML

#13912441
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23067) - you deserved it (6493)

On 11/20/2010 at 2:07pm - kids - by Lexi - Canada

Today, a funny smelling liquid was sprayed all over the computer. Last week, I told my fully pottytrained but extremely reluctant toddler that he couldn't play Barney games until he used the big boy toilet. A 4 year old's revenge really sucks. FML

#6515596
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25267) - you deserved it (5015)

On 11/29/2009 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML

#4903891
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11809) - you deserved it (61620)

On 08/29/2009 at 11:13am - love - by coolhand (man) - United States (Texas)



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