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ScrewedUpMess

Offline (the 08/17/2014 at 11:49am) | Search for a member

ScrewedUpMess

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 8 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 407
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About ScrewedUpMess : Luck of the Irish? Ha, I wish! I'm a very unlucky screwed up girl from Ireland who often has some pretty funny stories to tell. Feel free to message me... :)

ScrewedUpMess's page activity

Visits<b>illegalbeagle69</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 10:43am<b>elibel</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 9:33pm<b>Catkam623</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 11:39am<b>JMichael</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 4:55pm<b>mandyrozrox</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 3:38am<b>moksha</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 5:43am<b>brians2617m</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 12:11pm<b>Vic699</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 1:09pm<b>Helldemon</b> - the 07/26/2012 at 2:21pm

ScrewedUpMess's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of ScrewedUpMess's badges

ScrewedUpMess's favorite FMLs

Today, my fiancé said "Rachel" instead of my name when asked to repeat, "I take thee, Emily, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I was shocked, so he explained while laughing that he doesn't even know a Rachel. He ruined our wedding for a Friends quote. FML

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

#21137389
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58773) - you deserved it (5033)

On 05/12/2014 at 1:17am - kids - by kids -

Today, I brought home my 3D glasses after a movie. I had a laugh about it until I realized that I put my $100 sunglasses in the recycle box outside of the theatre instead. FML

#21109576
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36439) - you deserved it (20929)

On 04/10/2014 at 4:52pm - money - by BobRyder (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while at work, I went to unlock the washroom for a customer. Normally we don't allow customers to use the staff washrooms, so I was as surprised as the guy I found sitting on the toilet when I opened the door. FML

#21098949
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32835) - you deserved it (3715)

On 03/28/2014 at 11:02pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my teacher told us at least 7 different stories about his cat, Jeremy, and how much he eats. And he wonders why we never get anything done in his class. FML

#21097211
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34263) - you deserved it (3092)

On 03/26/2014 at 7:45pm - animals - by alicia75 - United States (Indiana)

Today, my drunken self became a vaguely racist poet. I am now the author of a four-page poem entitled "Chocolate Men". FML

#21094789
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30215) - you deserved it (16182)

On 03/23/2014 at 11:40pm - misc - by chocochoco - United States (New York)

Today, I had an elaborate fantasy of what I would do if I became a cat and how I would make my way to my crush's house to be their cat. FML

Today, in the middle of a Spanish oral exam, I start to panic. My teacher suggests I say whatever pops into my head. I blurt out, "Heeey Macarena!" FML

#21086197
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39471) - you deserved it (8095) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2014 at 12:33am - work - by LeChameauTrisomique - France (Centre)

Today, an American lady here in Ireland asked me if I was a Leprechaun. Thinking she was joking, and me being quite "vertically challenged," I decided to just say yes. She then grabbed me and made me endure photographs, cuddles and pats on the head from all her fellow tourists. FML

#21082683
186 comments

Today, I got home late from work, so I decided to make myself a microwave meal. I pierced the plastic film several times. A little too loudly for my hateful bastard of a neighbor, I guess, because he called the cops on me, claiming he heard gunshots from my apartment. FML

#21077955
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41159) - you deserved it (2937)

On 03/04/2014 at 3:44pm - misc - by fuck you, jack (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while walking through Wal-Mart I noticed a cute employee. With a sudden burst of confidence, I walked right up to him, intending to ask for his number. Instead, I looked him in the eye and said, "Excuse me sir, how much do you know about bedsheets?" and then ran. FML

#21077619
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39907) - you deserved it (11074)

On 03/04/2014 at 4:06am - love - by booksandshadows (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my roommate pranked me by putting blue food coloring in the shower head. I have class in 20 minutes and look like a smurf. FML

#21076785
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38993) - you deserved it (3647)

On 03/03/2014 at 11:30am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, out of boredom, I built my cat a little fort. Later, I decided to crawl inside to pet her, but as soon as I stuck my head in, she clawed me. I guess I'm not allowed in, then. FML

#21061796
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38697) - you deserved it (8522)

On 02/15/2014 at 7:50pm - animals - by unloved cat owner - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to a loud crashing in the middle of the night. I went to investigate, but found nothing amiss. Nothing except an axe firmly wedged in my front door, that is. It's safe to say that I have no clue who did it, and that I needed a fresh pair of underwear. FML

#20999316
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42549) - you deserved it (2504)

On 12/20/2013 at 4:05pm - misc - by nopissleft (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was gushing about my love for Disney princesses when someone told me I "definitely needed to calm down." By whom? A four-year-old girl. FML



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