Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Scourge13

Search for a member

Scourge13
  • Town/Country : Ft Eustis, Murica
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 630
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Scourge13 : Hi call me gabe im an easy going fun loving person ima long long way from home but i love what i do message me if you wanna have a convo i love food and have been told tht i eat way too much... Well if u wanna know anything just ask
Kik: XxMonster13xx

Scourge13's last visitors

iHiccupBSactuallyahippoDeerohdahshetLarissa24Crash7777ironfeyleeebeeeee18I_Am_A_Rockrainbow_llamasaa1717Bubuleblackhorizons

Scourge13's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Scourge13's badges

Scourge13's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML

#19877341
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25806) - you deserved it (3485)

On 07/01/2012 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be romantic to throw pebbles at my bedroom window in the middle of the night. It triggered the burglar alarm, which woke up everyone in the house. If my parents didn't know I had a boyfriend before, they certainly do now. FML

#19876638
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19841) - you deserved it (3925)

On 07/01/2012 at 4:01pm - love - by Jacqueline (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. In an ambulance. On the way to the hospital after being T-boned at an intersection. FML

#19873048
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29682) - you deserved it (1160)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, after watching Hulk with my friends, we spent a good half hour discussing exactly how enlarged Bruce Banner's package would be in his Hulk state. I couldn't hide my excitement, and now my friends won't stop teasing me. FML

#19871781
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6165) - you deserved it (19560)

On 06/30/2012 at 2:36pm - misc - by rs (woman) - Egypt

Today, in an attempt to be sexy, my boyfriend picked me up and threw me down onto the bed. I fell straight through it. FML

#19870376
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27518) - you deserved it (4704)

On 06/30/2012 at 5:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

Today, I was fired for using violence and intimidation in the work place. I was a bouncer at a strip club. FML

#19869373
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19545) - you deserved it (2716)

On 06/30/2012 at 1:08am - work - by John - United States (New York)

Today, I found out just how easy it is to be launched against the wall and sucker-punched into oblivion by a 200-pound former Marine turned professional body-builder. I discovered this after I told my fiancée's dad that we were expecting a baby. FML

#19867923
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21864) - you deserved it (3754)

On 06/29/2012 at 7:57pm - health - by fuckjuggalos (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out that the only way I can convince my husband to start working out is by convincing him that we are training for when the "zombie outbreak" happens. FML

#19862258
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18117) - you deserved it (3179)

On 06/28/2012 at 7:44pm - misc - by zombieguyswife (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML

#19861407
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5667) - you deserved it (76913)

On 06/28/2012 at 4:29pm - kids - by MeanMother - United States (Missouri)

Today, I confronted my daughter about the various drug-associated items I found in her room. She then confronted me about going in her room and invading her privacy, to the point where I forgot the main issue and apologised to her. I just got outsmarted by a teenage pothead. FML

#19857408
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7491) - you deserved it (26287)

On 06/27/2012 at 7:28pm - kids - by apparantlyStupid - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my grandmother said she's noticed that I've been very angry lately. She came to the conclusion that I "haven't been laid enough" and my boyfriend is "not doing his job." Thanks Grandma. FML

#19855906
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22529) - you deserved it (3994)

On 06/27/2012 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by RatCityChick - United States (Washington)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a nude picture, he sent it back to me with a mustache on my face from that iPhone app and told me he likes it much better that way. FML

#19853880
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22900) - you deserved it (8586)

On 06/27/2012 at 12:58am - intimacy - by maggie74 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML

#19851846
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22676) - you deserved it (1701)

On 06/26/2012 at 6:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, I found out that the phone number I switched to, used to host an amateur phone sex hotline. I found this out after getting several calls by teenagers, who sounded as if they were masturbating even as I yelled that they had the wrong number. FML

#19851648
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21818) - you deserved it (1507)

On 06/26/2012 at 5:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: