ScottyFoxx

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Offline (the 10/22/2014 at 10:30pm)

ScottyFoxx

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 10 July 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10749
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About ScottyFoxx : I love reading these FML's

ScottyFoxx's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

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ScottyFoxx's favorite FMLs

Today, I sent a student to the dean for trying to smoke pot in my class. His mother called to complain that I publicly humiliated her son. FML

by chinaski7628 / 09/24/2013 at 6:00pm / United States (California) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had to explain to my brother why it's not OK to stick his knob in the toaster. FML

by latter / 09/23/2013 at 8:05pm / United States (Maryland) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML

by Anonymous / 09/22/2013 at 1:40am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, being the prank couple that we are, I decided to mess with my husband. When he got off work, I said, "The lady from your office called and said she was pregnant. From you." He immediately broke down crying, and said, "I knew it." Turns out, my fetus already has a sibling. FML

by oops / 09/20/2013 at 9:30pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, thanks to Grand Theft Auto, I found myself seriously thinking about holding up an armored bank truck when I saw it in traffic. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2013 at 6:52pm / United States / Money

Today, I went on a blind date. He showed up in a shirt that read, "I f*ck on first dates". FML

by ughreally / 09/19/2013 at 8:20pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, I had to put up with a student who stubbornly insisted that King Solomon was, in fact, a Pokémon. FML

by madden2014 / 09/19/2013 at 6:23pm / United States (California) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my daughter told me she is pregnant. The father is the foreign exchange student who just moved back to Germany. FML

by monkey / 09/19/2013 at 6:30am / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, I accidentally punched myself in the mouth while eating a Go-Gurt. I was eating it because I'd just had my wisdom teeth removed. FML

by GogurtBadass / 09/18/2013 at 12:55pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I was getting my cat some canned food. Out of habit I licked the spoon after I had emptied the can only to realize too late what I had done. FML

by OldHabitsDieHard / 09/18/2013 at 10:53am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, I had to explain to my grandfather that Canadians aren't evil by reminding him that he's Canadian. FML

by Anonymous / 09/17/2013 at 10:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I noticed that my new colleague never laughs. Instead she says, "LOL". I have to work with her every day. FML

by Jienaf / 09/17/2013 at 4:26am / Malta / Work

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML

by aherdofpigs / 09/02/2013 at 3:22pm / United States / Animals

Today, my friend told me she turned down a job as a babysitter because she didn't want to be secretly videotaped, as she knew the people had a nanny cam. I wasn't aware of this when I took that same job a few nights ago and asked my boyfriend to come by. We had sex on their couch. FML

by happyturtle / 09/01/2013 at 5:57am / Croatia / Intimacy

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my friends. At one point, I jokingly pointed out how one of them had the smallest boobs of us all. She calmly got out of the pond, dried herself, scooped up our clothes and phones, and drove off in her car. The cops she called arrived soon after. FML

by criminal tit offender / 08/31/2013 at 12:25pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous