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Schragermeister

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Schragermeister
  • Town/Country : Daytona, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 July 1992 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 330
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Schragermeister : Hi!
Welcome to my profile. I love meeting new people and making friends. I'm the youngest of four. I have two twin brothers (Josh and Niclas). Josh is a Marine (Semper Fi), and Niclas is... well he's Niclas. Then my sister Kari came along. Then me... the "Uh Oh Baby"/ everyone's favorite. Yeah, right!
Family is very important to us, so "Don't mess with the family."
I have a handful of besties. They're awesome! I couldn't ask for a better group of friends. Especially George (my dog! He's a great dane and about three times my size)!
If you'd like to ask me anything or what not, go for it!

Schragermeister's last visitors

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Schragermeister's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Schragermeister's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. Halfway through he asked me what day it was. I told him, "Friday." He jumped up and ran over to the TV yelling, "Oh my God! Shark week is almost over!!" I was cock-blocked by the Discovery Channel. FML

#4359063 (226)

I agree, your life sucks (38547) - you deserved it (5918)

On 08/07/2009 at 11:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. 20 minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML

#4158002 (205)

I agree, your life sucks (46857) - you deserved it (12769)

On 07/30/2009 at 10:43am - animals - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I went into my part-time job at a drugstore. We always have one item we try and sell to every customer. For the next week I have to ask every person if they would like to try my nuts. FML

#4147298 (128)

I agree, your life sucks (30279) - you deserved it (2850)

On 07/29/2009 at 11:17pm - misc - by arsenic660 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I bust my lip when a car bumped into mine. As I headed home, I was stopped by the police who told me my back light was out. I tried to explain, but it just came out as "fghjiljh" because of my lip. I was arrested on suspicion of drinking and driving. FML

I agree, your life sucks (39043) - you deserved it (2552)

On 07/23/2009 at 5:19pm - misc - by Gg (man) - United Kingdom (Bradford)

Today, I was walking through a heavy door at work, so I reached behind me to catch it so it wouldn't slam shut. Little did I know that my boss was walking through right after me. Instead of catching the door, I caught a handful of his crotch. FML

#3982111 (126)

I agree, your life sucks (38839) - you deserved it (3676)

On 07/23/2009 at 4:23pm - work - by bossgroper (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I said to the pool-boy of my house: “I know what you are doing and you have to stop it.” He started shouting that I had no right to tell them what to do and that they were in love. He was referring to his relationship with my eldest son. I wanted to tell him to stop drinking my beers. FML

#3973803 (275)

I agree, your life sucks (45917) - you deserved it (5987)

On 07/23/2009 at 7:13am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I was taking a shower when my boyfriend suddenly hopped in with me. We were getting a little frisky when my mom's hand unexpectedly came through the curtain, and dropped a condom in the bottom of the shower, all the while saying, "Keep it safe kids!". FML

#3932433 (380)

I agree, your life sucks (45814) - you deserved it (20903)

On 07/21/2009 at 3:45pm - intimacy - by uh-oh (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I realized why I was hired to be a nanny. Apparently the husband had eyes for the last nanny. According to the wife I am not attractive enough to be a threat. FML

I agree, your life sucks (37748) - you deserved it (2066)

On 07/21/2009 at 4:49am - misc - by nottananny (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went on a rollercoaster for the first time. I sat in the back, which was a bad idea. When it ended everyone in front of me turned around and stared. When I asked my friend what was going on, she said I had been screaming the Lord's Prayer the whole time. I hadn't even noticed. FML

#3908348 (308)

I agree, your life sucks (28021) - you deserved it (18591)

On 07/20/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by whyme_ss - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend, who never initiates sex, pulled me into my room and onto my bed with kisses and other seductive behavior. As I'm thinking about how awesome it is that's she's doing this for once, she reaches down, grabs my underwear, and gives me the worst wedgie I've ever received. FML

#3684210 (221)

I agree, your life sucks (59271) - you deserved it (9290)

On 07/12/2009 at 1:38am - intimacy - by robinhoood (man) - United States (California)

Today, my friend and I decided to get bikini waxes. Afterwards, the women who did the waxing told my friend it was $30 for her wax. Then, in front of the whole salon, the women points at me and says, "You! You so hairy- $35!". FML

#3669971 (261)

I agree, your life sucks (46518) - you deserved it (6273)

On 07/11/2009 at 4:11pm - health - by waxinghorror (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was waiting in line for breakfast at the McDonalds drive-thru. After getting so fed up that the line hadn't budged for 10 mins, I decided to pull out of the line just to realize I was waiting behind 2 parked cars that were just to the left of the drive-thru lane. FML

I agree, your life sucks (5701) - you deserved it (38669)

On 07/09/2009 at 10:01am - misc - by StUbbY (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I came home and found out that my new roommate, who smokes half a pack of cigarettes a day and drinks heavily 5 nights a week, had smashed my $300 bong because "weed is a horrible and deadly drug that will kill you slowly." FML

Today, my eye started hurting with unbelievable pain. I couldn't see out of it and I asked my father if he would take me to the hospital, since it was hurting so bad. He said he had to wait for the pizza he ordered for delivery. I had to call a cab to go to the emergency room because of pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks (35134) - you deserved it (1652)

On 07/05/2009 at 3:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was on a train when an old man standing next to me very obviously checked me out, caught my eye, and winked. He spent the next five minutes rubbing his penis against my leg. When I turned to tell him off, the train lurched, and the old man fell face first into my breasts. FML

#3493845 (183)

I agree, your life sucks (40477) - you deserved it (4570)

On 07/05/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by bridezilla (woman) - Canada (Alberta)



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