Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Scarylizard1798

Offline (yesterday at 3:22am) | Search for a member

Scarylizard1798

4Liked!

Scarylizard1798Scarylizard1798
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 809
  • Number of comments : 61
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Scarylizard1798 : USA, near NYC, life is great but I gotta get a published fml...

Scarylizard1798's page activity

Visits<b>RayneWolf13</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 2:02pm<b>Kyra1</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 4:29pm<b>tbro47</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 11:40am<b>Soccerfan2002</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 12:49am<b>Sexy_Time</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 8:11pm<b>cannedpeas</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 6:35pm<b>JoshArson</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 4:54am<b>SouthernPride95</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 9:09am<b>Yeshua</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 10:55pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 5:42pm<b>brook823</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 12:22am<b>jvfelicio</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 1:09am<b>DrSkillz</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 11:47pm<b>BakenWake420</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 6:26pm<b>amazing_race190</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 5:48pm<b>marulicko</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 4:36pm<b>eddy1965</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 1:34pm<b>Classy_Sassy_15</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 1:15pm

Liked!<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 11:24pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 8:08pm<b>Kellacirillo</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 6:21am<b>summer135790</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 11:58pm

Scarylizard1798's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Scarylizard1798's badges

Scarylizard1798's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend was rushed to the hospital with anal tearing. We've never tried anal before, but it turns out she and my "best friend" sure have. FML

#21342800
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39676) - you deserved it (2477)

On 01/23/2015 at 9:58am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, both my female flatmate and my gay male flatmate have got their boyfriends round. They've both stuck 'Do Not Disturb' signs on their bedroom doors and are both playing music which doesn't quite muffle the sounds of what they're up to. I haven't had a date in over six months. FML

#21335645
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31651) - you deserved it (3408)

On 01/12/2015 at 7:53am - love - by fukinlonely (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His father was completely wasted, his mom was high, and his 11-year-old sister was talking about her favorite alcoholic drinks at the dinner table. FML

#21335369
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31772) - you deserved it (2579)

On 01/11/2015 at 9:41pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, while heading to the bathroom, I saw my girlfriend putting some lingerie under my bed. I stupidly thought it was for some sexy time later. Well, later on, she dramatically "found" the lingerie and broke up with me. Almost everyone believes her story and thinks I'm a dirty cheater. FML

#21333944
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39509) - you deserved it (2452)

On 01/09/2015 at 2:04pm - love - by je suis christy - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over a stupid argument, but after a long day we made up and got back together. Not long afterwards, my friend called, feeling guilty and confessing that he had sex with her after finding out she'd dumped me. FML

#21332729
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38993) - you deserved it (3141)

On 01/07/2015 at 2:37pm - love - by Anonymous - Guam

Today, my father seems to be having an affair. A used condom was carelessly left on his nightstand and my mother found it. She refuses to believe that my boyfriend and I are not responsible. As punishment I am "no longer allowed to see him." We're both 22 and live together in our own apartment. FML

#21331631
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36422) - you deserved it (2458)

On 01/05/2015 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by innocent (woman) - United States

Today, I found out my 7-year-old daughter really did lie about my husband's "other girlfriend" as revenge for being grounded, and that he never cheated on me at all. We're well into our divorce proceedings and he won't forgive me for not believing him when he denied it. FML

#21327839
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23338) - you deserved it (42316)

On 12/31/2014 at 2:00pm - kids - by skanula414 (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, my aunt and uncle came into the restaurant I work at to give me a late Christmas gift. The gift was the $20 tip they left, which got divided amongst all the staff. FML

Today, my obsessive stalker of an ex found my girlfriend on Facebook and sent her a message saying just ":)". For some reason I'll never understand, she took this as a sign that I'd just slept with my ex. Now I'm single, and my ex is probably planning her next move. FML

#21324775
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31374) - you deserved it (2278)

On 12/26/2014 at 4:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, at a Christmas party, a cute girl was making a show of standing under some mistletoe. As I walked over, she quickly moved away in the opposite direction. FML

#21324253
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28420) - you deserved it (3494)

On 12/25/2014 at 8:24pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, on a first date with a guy, I spilled ice cream all over my pants. He bought me some more, and as I was thanking him, he said, "You've never had a guy treat you right, have you?" I said no and started crying. FML

#21322290
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39047) - you deserved it (4353)

On 12/22/2014 at 8:28pm - love - by Soulara89 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my vegan girlfriend openly admitted that she'd let me die if she had to choose between saving my life or an animal's. She actually seemed confused as to why that upset me. FML

#21316969
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31373) - you deserved it (3710)

On 12/13/2014 at 8:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend confessed that she's been cheating on me for the past two months. Apparently she thought I'd take it well, because when I yelled at her for being a heartless bitch, she stuttered "S-sike!" and tried to play it off as a prank. She's acting like we're still dating. FML

#21316716
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32976) - you deserved it (2690)

On 12/13/2014 at 11:19am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I woke up from a wet dream. My girlfriend quickly figured it out and bitched me out for having one when she was "right there" for me to ask for sex. Logic failure aside, the last time I flirted with her, she called me a sex-obsessed pig and didn't talk to me for three days. FML

#21315008
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35211) - you deserved it (3704)

On 12/10/2014 at 1:16pm - intimacy - by unlovedandunfucked (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my mother-in-maw informed us that she sold her house and is moving in with us so we'll "take care" of her in old age. She's in perfect health. We've only been married for 4 months. My wife can't stand her for more than 2 weeks at a time, let alone living with us. FML

#21314927
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32023) - you deserved it (2633)

On 12/10/2014 at 9:05am - misc - by NotAnInLawFamilyMan (man) - United States (California)



Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML
  • Hello everyone, how's it going? You doing OK? Friday is the right time to get your glad rags on, go out, meet your friends, have a drink, get your freak on, shoot the breeze, shoot some hoops, don't shoot…

Friday 30 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: