ScarletHands

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Offline (the 04/05/2014 at 10:24am)

ScarletHands

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Friday 27 November 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 502
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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ScarletHands's page activity

Visits<b>ABillOnFire</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 12:02am<b>SPARTAN11810</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 2:05pm<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 2:38am<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 8:27pm<b>El_Mojiiito</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 8:16am<b>JD1147</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 7:55pm<b>aruden</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 3:00pm<b>zckrylogan</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 12:14pm<b>DarkArbiter5555</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 7:10am<b>the1pumpCHUMP</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 6:58pm<b>hurryHM</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 3:59pm<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 12:27am<b>dawsonstar</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 1:49pm<b>sanchezdavid</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 2:00am<b>redwill85</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 7:36am<b>Shayaan</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 1:15am<b>Arni792</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 3:30pm<b>Retrokitty</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 12:56pm

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ScarletHands's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to convince my 3-year-old son that there were monsters in the house just so he would lie in bed and cuddle me. FML

by tinytiny1124 / 04/14/2014 at 12:57pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, my coworker tried to convince my boss that I'm not human. Her examples of how I'm influenced by demons included how I don't wear a jacket in the winter, and that I once got a nosebleed from sneezing. My boss thinks she's hilarious and is playing along. FML

by worker666 / 04/13/2014 at 10:51am / United States / Work

Today, I was taking the biggest shit of my life. When I worked the thing out, it hit the water with such force that I got a toilet water enema from the backwash. I was so freaked out that I screamed and fell off the seat, prompting my husband to rush in to see what was wrong. FML

by traumatized / 04/12/2014 at 2:07pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my teacher used an online program and accused me of plagiarism. According to the program, I plagiarized my own last name. FML

by zoegirl_455 / 04/09/2014 at 5:57pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I witnessed my roommate telling a girl that he has "really healthy shits". I wanted to make fun of him, but he got laid by said girl and I went home to jerk off. FML

by damn / 04/09/2014 at 5:12pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

by Brody89 / 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, I realized how boring and sexually deprived my life is when I found a gas station ten cents cheaper than the one I usually use. It gave me both an asthma attack and an erection, simultaneously. FML

by the long distance guy / 04/08/2014 at 3:56am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, while playing basketball, my friend thanked me for passing the ball to him. I was too embarrassed to tell him that that was me shooting. FML

by DetergentFrog6 / 04/07/2014 at 4:54pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, at the café I work at, I was yelled at by a woman because the drinks and food she ordered were "taking too long". Before I had the chance to get a word in, she stormed out and said she would never come back. I didn't get the chance to inform her that she hadn't ordered yet. FML

by Anonymous / 04/06/2014 at 8:20pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Work

Today, I witnessed my psycho neighbor put her cat in a cage, cross into my backyard, and set the cage down before returning to her house. She then called the cops and claimed I'd stolen her cat. The cops didn't believe my side of the story for a second. FML

by Anonymous / 04/06/2014 at 3:37pm / Animals

Today, I found out that my three closest online friends are the same person: my obsessive ex. I met all three before he and I even started dating. FML

by Anonymous / 04/06/2014 at 2:09pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I called my mom to ask for some help with my dishwasher. Somehow, the call got turned into a video call. I was wearing a bathrobe, and she was naked in her bathroom. Most awkward call ever. FML

by FaceTime issues / 04/06/2014 at 2:57am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling the cup of pee all over myself. I had to explain what had happened, then go sit in a waiting room full of disgusted-looking people, while I kept drinking water to fill my bladder back up. FML

by Anonymous / 04/05/2014 at 7:16pm / United States (Iowa) / Work

Today, I got up early in the morning to get a snack, only to walk in on my "vegan" housemate eating a turkey sandwich. This bastard harasses me every other day about my meat-eating, but all he could do after he noticed me was drop the sandwich and claim he'd been sleepwalking. FML

by fuck you with a bacon cock / 04/04/2014 at 6:07pm / United Kingdom (Moray) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's the last day of my sign language class. At the end of the class, my teacher surprised us by speaking for the first time, also surprising everyone that she wasn't actually deaf. It wouldn't have been so bad had I not just given someone an answer to the test, thinking she couldn't hear me. FML