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SayPeanuts

Offline (the 02/19/2014 at 11:27pm) | Search for a member

SayPeanuts

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 18 November 1993 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2975
  • Number of comments : 133
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About SayPeanuts : "Look, now he’s going up on that little ladder. Up he goes with that little wiggle of his. The wiggle of Judas. The Judas boogie."

SayPeanuts's page activity

Visits<b>Recoveryben</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 4:37pm<b>laurenalexis09</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 8:22pm<b>ILoveHashtags</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 8:56am<b>1947Chevy</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 2:32pm<b>katertott</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 3:09am<b>drshn</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 4:53pm<b>applexj</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 6:56am<b>intheheart</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 7:47pm<b>mnskidoo</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 9:06pm<b>insidious12</b> - the 04/24/2013 at 11:28pm<b>kenoswild</b> - the 03/15/2013 at 6:34am<b>blink_kid</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 8:46pm<b>stevenJB</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 4:33am<b>pinkvoltage</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 11:38pm<b>ICastillo</b> - the 01/15/2013 at 11:58pm<b>boredphil</b> - the 01/09/2013 at 2:48am<b>bluevayero</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 2:41am<b>yankee_lovrXXo</b> - the 01/07/2013 at 10:26pm

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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SayPeanuts's favorite FMLs

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

#1604682
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (269838) - you deserved it (17577)

On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I got approached by a hot young lady in a bar. After joking around for a few minutes she said "hey I love your jacket, where'd you get that?". I then told her that it's actually a replica of the Indiana Jones jacket. This is when she remembered that she "had to go somewhere". FML

#1288123
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17492) - you deserved it (56783)

On 04/24/2009 at 12:40pm - love - by cole (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got a spray tan for the first time. Naked, I climbed into the booth. When the machine started I became frightened by the loud roar of the spray and couldn't breathe. I pissed myself out of fear. I now have river-like streaks down both legs where the pee washed my tan away. FML

#1246949
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22648) - you deserved it (83701)

On 04/23/2009 at 1:44am - health - by tgstreaks (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I was fixing my makeup in the back room of the office when my boss walked in. He looked kind of annoyed so I jokingly said "Don't you want your secretary to look good?" He said, "If I did I wouldn't have hired you." FML

#797554
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56361) - you deserved it (12364)

On 04/04/2009 at 10:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after finishing a huge French essay, I realized my printer wasn't working. So, I emailed it to a guy in my class to print and then give to me. When I get to French, he said he had already turned his in early and never got my email. It turned out he used mine. I got an F on the essay. FML

#635600
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62274) - you deserved it (16637)

On 03/26/2009 at 11:38pm - misc - by lauren555 - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to Walmart with my mom. At the check out line I was eating a bag of chips as my mom bought her stuff. I inhaled while eating and I started to choke. The cashier asked me if I was okay. My mom just waved her hand, and said, "Sometimes she does that for attention, ignore her." FML

#314524
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86785) - you deserved it (7438)

On 03/14/2009 at 12:13am - health - by choker (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was woken up by the sound of power tools at 6:30am. I stuck my head out my window and yelled at them to shut up. They didn't stop. I walked out the front door to find the bastard. It was firemen. They were sawing down the door of my neighbour's burning house. FML

Today, my mom told my boyfriend all about how she had to be a parent volunteer when I was in kindergarten. Apparently I used to masturbate in class by rubbing myself against the edges of chairs and tables. The teacher thought it would be best if my mom was there to make me stop. FML

#280083
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (142021) - you deserved it (15943)

On 03/12/2009 at 7:24am - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I was the only one in an elevator when an attractive girl came in, talking on her phone. She told her friend, "I have to go, there's a cute guy on this elevator." Before I could even react, she turned to me and said, "Sorry for lying, I really wanted to get off the phone with her." FML

#265039
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (237221) - you deserved it (14783)

On 03/10/2009 at 9:10pm - misc - by TuralSucks (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my mom called and told me I got accepted to my first-choice college. I got really excited and asked her to read me the letter. As she started to read it, she said, "Oops... uh, nevermind." FML

#252648
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70249) - you deserved it (2616)

On 03/09/2009 at 4:48pm - misc - by stillwaiting (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was babysitting for my mom's coworkers two little boys. they went to bed around 9 and I was watching a movie on HBO. I fell asleep before the movie was over. I woke up to the parents walking into the house. I looked at the TV, and porn was on. FML

#247252
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54840) - you deserved it (11680)

On 03/08/2009 at 10:53pm - kids - by monty (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was looking at some comments on a silly YouTube video of me dancing with some friends. Someone posted a comment saying "Girl on the right is hot!!!." Next to that, it had about 31 thumbs down. I'm the girl on the right. FML

#240683
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44501) - you deserved it (9225)

On 03/08/2009 at 4:47am - misc - by Ugly (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked into the kitchen and accidentally broke my mother's vase. I said, "Accidents happen." She replied, "Yeah, like your birth." FML

#234028
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (94892) - you deserved it (18610)

On 03/07/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Cody (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my friend sent me an instant message, telling me how excited she was that she was accepted to a FIT Summer Program. I told her I was so proud, and that she can finally lose that excess weight. She told me that she meant Fashion Institute of Technology. FML

#233851
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14799) - you deserved it (64864)

On 03/07/2009 at 12:41pm - misc - by Noname - United States (New York)



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