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SayPeanuts

Offline (the 02/19/2014 at 11:27pm) | Search for a member

SayPeanuts

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 18 November 1993 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2726
  • Number of comments : 133
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About SayPeanuts : "Look, now he’s going up on that little ladder. Up he goes with that little wiggle of his. The wiggle of Judas. The Judas boogie."

SayPeanuts's page activity

Visits<b>Recoveryben</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 4:37pm<b>laurenalexis09</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 8:22pm<b>ILoveHashtags</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 8:56am<b>1947Chevy</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 2:32pm<b>katertott</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 3:09am<b>drshn</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 4:53pm<b>applexj</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 6:56am<b>intheheart</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 7:47pm<b>mnskidoo</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 9:06pm<b>insidious12</b> - the 04/24/2013 at 11:28pm<b>kenoswild</b> - the 03/15/2013 at 6:34am<b>blink_kid</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 8:46pm<b>stevenJB</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 4:33am<b>pinkvoltage</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 11:38pm<b>ICastillo</b> - the 01/15/2013 at 11:58pm<b>boredphil</b> - the 01/09/2013 at 2:48am<b>bluevayero</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 2:41am<b>yankee_lovrXXo</b> - the 01/07/2013 at 10:26pm

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You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of SayPeanuts's badges

SayPeanuts's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the grocery store where my husband works. I wanted to surprise him, so I went up behind him and started kissing his neck. He seemed to love it, and so did I, until I noticed it wasn't my husband. FML

#14023578
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10712) - you deserved it (41327)

On 11/29/2010 at 1:26pm - love - by vhtdgjj - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I woke up on the top bunk of my bed with the birds chirping. I felt so energized, I gave a big stretch, and my hand hit the ceiling. I accidentally pushed the ceiling board up and lots of tiny spiders fell on me and my bed. FML

#13972992
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32667) - you deserved it (3752)

On 11/25/2010 at 9:48am - animals - by Seline -

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my fingers got stuck between the wall and headboard. Screaming, he thought I was enjoying the sex and kept going even harder. I have 3 broken fingers. FML

#13418490
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45185) - you deserved it (8155)

On 10/12/2010 at 8:57am - intimacy - by fungettingdressed - United States

Today, I learned that my girlfriend gives good head. I didn't find out by getting one, I found out by my drunk best friend telling me. FML

#13213227
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30840) - you deserved it (2536)

On 09/26/2010 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I went to the drive-through and ordered 5 cheeseburgers. I told the cashier that some of them were for my girlfriend. I don't have a girlfriend, and I ate all of them by myself. FML

#12408546
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11773) - you deserved it (48744)

On 08/09/2010 at 9:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I stole a bite of my boyfriend's hamburger. He threw a fit, saying I took too big a bite and I had to replace it with a new, more expensive one. Afterwards, he said how lucky I was he didn't break up with me then and there. FML

#8822462
367 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33095) - you deserved it (9065)

On 03/04/2010 at 12:15pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Estonia (Harjumaa)

Today, after a particularly gruesome nightmare about spiders due to my irrational phobia, I decided to try and desensitise myself by googling 'house spiders'. I can't stop the feeling of something crawling over every inch of my body, but at least I now know they can live up to six years. FML

#8700237
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17683) - you deserved it (6374)

On 02/27/2010 at 9:03pm - health - by joolsie (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, after 22 years of perfect skin, I woke up with a bunch of angry zits on my nose. I used a clay face mask that was supposed to dry them out. Instead, they were bigger and green. Today is Valentine's day, I finally have a guy to go out with, and my nose looks like it's rotting off. FML

#8242504
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27722) - you deserved it (4814)

On 02/14/2010 at 9:14am - love - by zitgirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my daughter learned that if she rips a toy out of its package in front of a store employee, mommy will be forced to buy it. She now has two new toys today. FML

#7273590
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30847) - you deserved it (9760)

On 01/11/2010 at 3:09am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after taking my clothes out of the washer, I noticed at the very bottom of the washer my boyfriend's USB stick I found a couple of days ago. The USB stick contains his English essay, and his novel he has been working on for almost six months. FML

#6746306
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11041) - you deserved it (27495)

On 12/14/2009 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up and rolled out of bed. I'm on the top mattress of a bunk bed. We have tile floors. FML

#6535314
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29156) - you deserved it (7847)

On 11/30/2009 at 4:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was wrapping Christmas presents for various people; 17 to be exact. It wasn't until I placed the last present on top of the stack that I realized I didn't put gift tags on any of them. FML

#6510557
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10460) - you deserved it (36023)

On 11/29/2009 at 9:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got wasted at a party and went out to my car to get something. I went back to the house and realized I got locked out. After knocking on the door, ringing the doorbell, and shouting "LET ME INNNN" my friend called and asked where I was. That's when I realized I was at the wrong house. FML

#6246770
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6078) - you deserved it (33842)

On 11/10/2009 at 7:10pm - misc - by Abby (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, at work, I realized that not everyone in the office needs to hear my explosive diarrhea through the a/c vents that interconnect through the entire building. I think an email was sent around, describing people's reactions in detail. FML

#6016625
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24830) - you deserved it (2562)

On 10/26/2009 at 11:15pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was reading in my bed, and my cat was lying on my chest. I noticed something white on my cat's leg. I'm far-sighted and wasn't wearing my glasses, so I didn't see what it was. I touched it and put on my glasses. Turns out it was a worm hanging out of my cat's anus. It started wiggling. FML

#6006091
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38064) - you deserved it (5318)

On 10/26/2009 at 12:42pm - animals - by K.H (man) - Sweden (Dalarnas Lan)



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