About SayPeanuts : "Look, now he’s going up on that little ladder. Up he goes with that little wiggle of his. The wiggle of Judas. The Judas boogie."
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, my daughter learned that if she rips a toy out of its package in front of a store employee, mommy will be forced to buy it. She now has two new toys today. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24418) - you deserved it (7564)
On 01/11/2010 at 3:09am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, after taking my clothes out of the washer, I noticed at the very bottom of the washer my boyfriend's USB stick I found a couple of days ago. The USB stick contains his English essay, and his novel he has been working on for almost six months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8877) - you deserved it (22567)
On 12/14/2009 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I woke up and rolled out of bed. I'm on the top mattress of a bunk bed. We have tile floors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24349) - you deserved it (7173)
On 11/30/2009 at 4:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was wrapping Christmas presents for various people; 17 to be exact. It wasn't until I placed the last present on top of the stack that I realized I didn't put gift tags on any of them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8554) - you deserved it (27563)
On 11/29/2009 at 9:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I got wasted at a party and went out to my car to get something. I went back to the house and realized I got locked out. After knocking on the door, ringing the doorbell, and shouting "LET ME INNNN" my friend called and asked where I was. That's when I realized I was at the wrong house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4229) - you deserved it (24247)
On 11/10/2009 at 7:10pm - misc - by Abby (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, at work, I realized that not everyone in the office needs to hear my explosive diarrhea through the a/c vents that interconnect through the entire building. I think an email was sent around, describing people's reactions in detail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20670) - you deserved it (2218)
On 10/26/2009 at 11:15pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was reading in my bed, and my cat was lying on my chest. I noticed something white on my cat's leg. I'm far-sighted and wasn't wearing my glasses, so I didn't see what it was. I touched it and put on my glasses. Turns out it was a worm hanging out of my cat's anus. It started wiggling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31801) - you deserved it (4031)
On 10/26/2009 at 12:42pm - animals - by K.H (man) - Sweden (Dalarnas Lan)
Today, I learned that the excessive groin sweating I've been trying to deal with for weeks isn't groin sweating. It's a slow and steady stream of urine that I have no control over. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39783) - you deserved it (2392)
On 10/09/2009 at 5:25pm - health - by lizzzie (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)
Today, I went to the bar to celebrate my friend's birthday party. I gave the bouncer my ID and he kicked me out, saying that I should at least use an ID card with the correct gender. I'm 22 and female, he thought I was an underage boy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29362) - you deserved it (2600)
On 09/27/2009 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I went to the bar to celebrate my friend's birthday party. I gave the bouncer my ID and he kicked me out, saying that I should at least use an ID card with the correct gender. I'm 22 and female, he thought I was an underage boy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29362) - you deserved it (2600)
On 09/27/2009 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, while at my parent's house I decided to take a shower. I had to use my sister's bathroom and once out, grabbed a comb from her cupboard to brush my hair. I then noticed the clumps of hair on my shoulders. It's a razor comb on one side, regular on the other. I used the wrong side. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23352) - you deserved it (12127)
On 09/10/2009 at 8:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, after going to T-Mobile thinking my phone won't receive texts, I found out that my phone is perfectly fine, my friends just don't text me back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36796) - you deserved it (5980)
On 08/26/2009 at 10:28pm - misc - by nofriends (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, at my wedding reception, my father began his speech with "Well, I never, ever thought that this day would come," at which point the entire room, including my new husband, broke into a round of enthusiastic applause. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32462) - you deserved it (3190)
On 08/08/2009 at 3:01pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I went to a bookstore and asked the sales woman,"Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14461) - you deserved it (37839)
On 08/04/2009 at 12:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I brought my lunch to work in the only box I had lying around my apartment - a small one from FedEx. When I went to the bathroom before lunch, I returned to my desk to find that one of my coworkers had mailed my lunch back to my apartment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37735) - you deserved it (7063)
On 07/27/2009 at 3:12pm - work - by fedexed (man) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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