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SayPeanuts

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SayPeanuts
  • Town/Country : Ireland
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 18 November 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 2034
  • Number of comments : 133
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About SayPeanuts : "Look, now he’s going up on that little ladder. Up he goes with that little wiggle of his. The wiggle of Judas. The Judas boogie."

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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SayPeanuts's favorite FMLs

Today, our new cat, which my mum was hesitant about letting us keep because she believes they're diseased, gave us all ringworm. FML

#16694485
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24440) - you deserved it (11443)

On 06/16/2011 at 12:14pm - health - by catlover - China

Today, I had to lie to my female roommate about what happened last night. She was drunk and spent half the night cuddling with me and trying to get me to kiss her. I've loved this girl for two years, but I promised her I wouldn't let her cheat on her boyfriend with anyone. Even me. FML

#16677911
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62690) - you deserved it (10960)

On 06/15/2011 at 2:00pm - love - by anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I posted my status on Facebook as "slightly hungover." My grandma commented on it with "liar, you were helping me clean last night." She's right. FML

#16221236
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12051) - you deserved it (61058)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I heard that one of our customers had passed away. Saddened, I told everyone who came into our shop about his death. Understandably, some customers got very upset and one even fainted. Suddenly, the 'dead' man walked into the shop. Turns out I got the name wrong. FML

#15640936
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9350) - you deserved it (33549)

On 04/04/2011 at 8:17pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Cavan)

Today, the bus came to pick up my daughter to take her to kindergarten. When it honked, I opened the door for her to let her run out to it. Halfway there she tripped and started crying. I couldn't run out because I was still in my underwear. Now her bus thinks I'm the worst mom ever. FML

#15313960
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16549) - you deserved it (37411)

On 03/14/2011 at 10:25pm - kids - by mommylovesu (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was at Aéropostale with some friends when I noticed a woman glaring at me. When we got to the checkout, the woman still had her eyes on me, so I asked why she was staring. She snapped, "If you had kept your legs closed, you wouldn't be pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML

#15284565
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36556) - you deserved it (4515)

On 03/12/2011 at 4:11pm - misc - by vlcardenx3 (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was having the best sex with my husband, and right when I reached climax, he shouted "Abracadabra!" FML

#15038049
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30363) - you deserved it (6398)

On 02/19/2011 at 8:12am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my friend came over with brownies as a treat before work. She works in a bakery so I thought it was lovely. After starting work, I became stoned. She thought it was a great prank. I was fired. FML

#15025975
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31840) - you deserved it (3010)

On 02/18/2011 at 8:06am - work - by sickly -

Today, my math teacher brought his laptop to tally up all our scores for our report card. He then displayed the results on a big screen in front of the whole class. The ones who failed were marked yellow. I was the only one marked yellow. FML

#15025118
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23298) - you deserved it (18187)

On 02/18/2011 at 4:30am - misc - by thestudent (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

#15024554
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34161) - you deserved it (3417)

On 02/18/2011 at 2:35am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, at work, I spent half an hour on the phone with a customer. At the end of the conversation, as he was putting down the phone, I heard him say 'God, he was a miserable git'. I'm a 28 year old woman. FML

#14637512
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18988) - you deserved it (3202)

On 01/19/2011 at 9:55am - work - by tgpgs -

Today, I was at the doctor's getting some skin scraped off the bottom of my foot for some tests. As soon as the doctor grabbed my foot, it tickled and I accidentally kicked him in the face. During this, the blade sliced my foot open. FML

#14482213
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21227) - you deserved it (7346)

On 01/06/2011 at 2:35am - health - by Anonymous -

Today, I discovered after four hours of vomiting that it is very much possible to vomit so hard you can't help but shit in your trousers. My boyfriend is currently staying over, too. FML

#14458988
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20107) - you deserved it (1891)

On 01/04/2011 at 2:12am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML

#14187537
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (94189) - you deserved it (5040)

On 12/13/2010 at 4:16am - health - by Christopher - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I sent a picture to my girlfriend of my erect penis with a quote saying "It's waiting for you." She responded with a picture of her left hand showing her left ring finger with a quote saying "It's waiting for you too." FML

#14120118
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11580) - you deserved it (79448)

On 12/07/2010 at 1:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)



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