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SavannahSunshine's FML badges
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SavannahSunshine's favorite FMLs
by anal-retentive / 06/23/2016 at 4:00pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I've just moved into a new apartment. It's also the day my big baby of a dog stepped on a rock and began yelping when I tried to touch his paw. He "suddenly" felt better after I carried him inside. Now everyone thinks I'm beating my dog. FML
by DogBeater / 06/20/2016 at 9:21pm / United States (Washington) / Animals
by anon / 05/06/2015 at 8:50am / United States (Kansas) / Love
by henrylikestreats / 04/30/2015 at 2:04pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, I saw one one of my cat's hairs on my sweatpants and wanted to remove it. It wasn't a cat hair, but a pubic hair that has found its way through my panties and sweatpants while being still attached to me. FML
by PeppermintPenny / 04/06/2015 at 9:54am / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Intimacy
by Vampire Teabag / 02/12/2015 at 11:25am / United States (Texas) / Love
by Anonymous / 02/11/2015 at 10:59pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work
by SDCore / 02/11/2015 at 7:40pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/10/2015 at 6:32pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by LD / 01/23/2015 at 11:46am / United States (Idaho) / Intimacy
by Jensa / 01/16/2015 at 4:59pm / United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire) / Health
Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML
by con135 / 01/12/2015 at 8:16pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
Today, I was at an outdoors Christmas party and I jokingly complained that my son says 'mama' way more than he says 'dada'. One of my students was at the party and watched him for a couple of hours. He taught him to say 'dada' every time he sees a bug. FML
by paparoach / 12/21/2014 at 2:59am / United States (Hawaii) / Kids
Today, my boss threw a pre-Christmas party at work. He always uses them to rant at us and tell us to be better employees. When the speech began, the alarm I have set for my daily birth control went off. It's the sound of an obnoxious screaming child. FML
by driven_crazy / 12/12/2014 at 2:52pm / United States (New Jersey) / Work
Today, being useless at thinking of gifts, I asked my boyfriend what he wants for Christmas. I said it could be anything that I could afford. He looked me in the eye and said very seriously: "Anal." FML
by fuckered519 / 12/06/2014 at 2:53pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…