About SauceySarah : Music is my everything. Panic! At The Disco& The Killers Just a teenage girl trying to have fun. I'm: Sarcastic. Blunt. Happy (most of the time). Forever Alone. By the way, I probably have stalked your account before.(:
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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, I went to my local coffee shop. I soon witnessed the girl making my drink apparently dislodge a wedgie from her ass-crack and then sneeze into her hands. When I confronted her, she loudly accused me of "visually molesting" her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18332) - you deserved it (1332)
On 07/22/2012 at 12:48pm - misc - by bitchimgay (man) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I realized that whenever I use emoticons, I tend to make the same face in real life. My coworkers gleefully showed me various pictures with my tongue out, face scrunched up, and so on, while staring at my phone. They've already made their way around the office. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5571) - you deserved it (10740)
On 07/21/2012 at 12:24pm - misc - by dawn (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I found out my late grandfather left me a significant amount of money in his will. I thought it was weird because he always acted like he hated me. When I got the envelope, there was $500,000 inside, all in Monopoly money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27416) - you deserved it (2082)
On 07/20/2012 at 1:13am - money - by Rachel - United States
Today, I was at work when a cute guy came up to me and said he liked my shirt. In a desperate attempt to say something back, I said, "Thanks, I like your shoelaces." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15915) - you deserved it (4304)
On 07/19/2012 at 6:31pm - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17513) - you deserved it (3983)
On 07/19/2012 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by cortanaisahobot - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8843) - you deserved it (31183)
Today, I finally realized how depressed I am when I found bubble wrap and didn't feel like popping it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24592) - you deserved it (1688)
On 07/19/2012 at 5:01am - health - by Epiphany (man) - United States
Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4465) - you deserved it (51345)
On 07/19/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend thought it appropriate to let me know that doing the "duck face" in my Facebook pictures "highlights my mustache." FML
I agree, your life sucks (4982) - you deserved it (45362)
On 07/17/2012 at 7:30pm - love - by mustachio101 (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, my husband and I stopped at a scenic overlook on top of a mountain. I looked down and noticed several small shells and excitedly called him over. I said, "I can't believe I found fossils here!" The moment it came out of my mouth, I realized they were pistachio shells. So did he. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4585) - you deserved it (12992)
On 07/17/2012 at 4:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alaska)
Today, I went to a big family dinner. At one point, my cousin ran up to me, sobbing hysterically, holding his crotch, and making a huge scene. Turns out that while taking a piss, he "accidentally" swatted his willy with an electric bug zapper. I can't believe I'm related to this little shit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15138) - you deserved it (1980)
On 07/15/2012 at 3:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML
I agree, your life sucks (3499) - you deserved it (34099)
On 07/14/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Nigeria (Lagos)
Today, I'm still freshly circumcised. My penis is still very sensitive, and I can't squat to grab stuff off the floor because of the pressure against my jeans. Kicking the objects up into my hands was working well, that is until I spilled a pack of 300 toothpicks all over the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19328) - you deserved it (4940)
On 07/13/2012 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I got mugged in broad daylight, in a park, by a teenage girl. To top it off, I'm a grown man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16787) - you deserved it (6242)
On 07/10/2012 at 11:27am - misc - by Username (man) - United States
Today, I went to an orchestra concert. Halfway through the performance I had to fart really bad, so I decided to try and sneak it in while the orchestra was playing a loud exciting part. Just as I let it rip, there was a dramatic pause in the music. Everyone heard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10549) - you deserved it (20830)
On 07/10/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Concert Flatulent - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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