Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SaturnV

Offline (8 hours ago) | Search for a member

SaturnV

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 26 January 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1714
  • Number of comments : 199
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

SaturnV's page activity

Visits<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 8:46am<b>captain_mal</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 1:16am<b>Justine94_x</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 1:32pm<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:38am<b>swharley</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 7:19am<b>ostfaiz</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 12:37am<b>melons</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 7:36pm<b>bobdlawr</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 4:26pm<b>xnikkilynn</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 1:52pm<b>Corey122726</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 1:24pm<b>DarkJediLove</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 12:56pm<b>christofferkamal</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 12:17pm<b>frozenlover218</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 2:50pm<b>cocainewhore</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 2:56am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 3:37am<b>Ben009</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 10:30pm<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 5:57am<b>isabel0010</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 11:33pm

Liked!<b>bobdlawr</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 10:26pm

SaturnV's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of SaturnV's badges

SaturnV's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

#20119984
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30941) - you deserved it (6203)

On 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by L (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, I fell down the stairs. Lying on my back in extreme pain, I called my mom for help. When she came over, she said I looked like a dead bug, took a picture and posted it on Facebook. FML

#20118333
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22145) - you deserved it (2003)

On 10/15/2012 at 5:38pm - health - by Bug (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my sister thought it would be funny to place a cardboard cut-out of a person at the foot of my bed. I woke up, saw the cut-out from the corner of my eye, fell out of bed, landed on my hand wrong, and broke two fingers. She got it all on video. FML

#20110797
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21412) - you deserved it (1950)

On 10/10/2012 at 5:44pm - misc - by scaredofcutouts (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, it was my uncle's funeral. I wasn't very close with him, but I still wanted to be respectful. My boyfriend, being the jackass that he is, was singing the Spider Pig song from The Simpsons under his breath while making his fingers walk up my leg, trying to get under my skirt. FML

#20096195
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23615) - you deserved it (6281)

On 10/01/2012 at 12:23am - love - by SorryUncleTommy (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I took my daughter to a pony ride at the fair. I paid to have her picture taken, and when we got home, I emailed it to my mom. She replied, disgustedly pointing out that the pretty little pony was displaying a pretty little penis. FML

#20076226
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18355) - you deserved it (2179)

On 09/17/2012 at 1:16pm - animals - by :,< - United States

Today, I found out there's a rumor going around that my smoking hot co-worker and I had sex over the weekend. I'm not nearly as pissed off about the rumor as I am by the fact that I can't remember it because I was too drunk. FML

#20069142
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9923) - you deserved it (28139)

On 09/12/2012 at 5:58pm - intimacy - by bruisedego31 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my grandpa was visiting. My neighbors started blasting out rap music, as they've done nearly 24/7 for months, telling me to fuck off when I complain. He went over and screamed he'd gut them like fish if they didn't pipe down. They did. He's 68 and still more intimidating than me. FML

#20062193
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20203) - you deserved it (4318)

On 09/07/2012 at 6:59pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I moved into college and met my new roommate. Not fifteen minutes later, she had told me about the fungus on her feet, and what happens when she forgets to take her anti-psychotic medication, all while picking at her nose and eating the spoils. FML

#20057380
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27514) - you deserved it (1708)

On 09/04/2012 at 1:14pm - misc - by Becoming a commuter. (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend in the bathroom, we heard a knock at the door, then her father's voice. I had to fake constipation noises until he left. FML

#20053940
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22218) - you deserved it (12166)

On 09/02/2012 at 11:38am - intimacy - by scot - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my dog, who has been specially trained to go for help when I'm having a seizure, went to alert my parents downstairs that I was having an emergency. The "emergency" was me masturbating. FML

#20052579
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33776) - you deserved it (10489)

On 09/01/2012 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by thewhompingwillow (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to force myself to take a dump at school, even though I have severe restroom anxiety and shyness. I had finally relaxed enough to go when the tornado drills went off mid-dump, and 46 students and teachers packed into the bathroom with me. FML

#20048959
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33041) - you deserved it (2236)

On 08/30/2012 at 1:55am - misc - by DamnTornadoAlley - United States (Texas)

Today, at the water park, my grandmother's boob slipped out. Every time I close my eyes, I see her dangling breast in my mind. FML

#20029280
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28767) - you deserved it (2490)

On 08/19/2012 at 1:25am - misc - by JMG - United States

Today, my mom's intense fear of tornadoes caused her to break into the bathroom, drag me off the toilet while I was changing my tampon, and drag me to the basement with my pants around my ankles to join my father, brother, and my brother's best friend. FML

#20002813
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32214) - you deserved it (1595)

On 08/04/2012 at 8:44pm - misc - by m - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was pooping at a local Target when I heard someone say "You need to eat more solids, you're pooping like a rabbit." FML

#20001897
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21296) - you deserved it (3673)

On 08/04/2012 at 7:35am - misc - by llaurenmariee - United States

Today, a homeless lady decided she needed to change underwear in the middle of the sidewalk. I turned around just in time to see her legs in the air with no undies on. I can never eat salami again. FML

#19988661
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20434) - you deserved it (2061)

On 07/28/2012 at 4:07am - misc - by em from Cali - United States (California)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: