SaturnV

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Offline (the 09/14/2015 at 1:09pm)

SaturnV

11Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 26 January 1986 (30 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3585
  • Number of comments : 202
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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SaturnV's page activity

Visits<b>EwahWeeWah</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 7:22am<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 10:12am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 3:15pm<b>Kamorka</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 4:16pm<b>Brian2911</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 7:58am<b>myaahni</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 10:53pm<b>TyroneLeBron</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 6:18am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 2:33pm<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 5:03pm<b>COURT_KING</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 12:36am<b>ratman775</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 1:13am<b>LunaaBluee</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 7:28pm<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 3:44am<b>vet1</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 1:27am<b>Damafia</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 7:27am<b>ZelmaSlayer</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 4:50am<b>DamnBailie</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 1:31am<b>Liamj774</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 5:19pm

Fucked!<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 11:03pm<b>vet1</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 7:27am<b>Liamj774</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 11:20pm<b>bekkylove22</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 11:07pm<b>cakesordeath</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 6:49pm<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 2:22pm<b>tchopper1969</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 12:12pm<b>Codezlol</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 8:58pm<b>briang959</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 10:20pm<b>Evil20071</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 11:23pm<b>bobdlawr</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 10:26pm

SaturnV's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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SaturnV's favorite FMLs

Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2013 at 2:41pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting ready, when I heard my dad in the shower. He was singing along to the song "The Wheel in the Sky" by Journey. Except he'd changed the lyrics and was singing, "The dick on this guy needs a rubbin'." It turns out my mom was in the shower with him. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2013 at 12:13pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, through sheer luck, I got talking to an actor from the Harry Potter films who I've had a crush on since I was about ten. I tried to play it cool, and pretend I didn't know who he was. Then my phone rang, with the Harry Potter theme tune. FML

by itsellie27 / 04/30/2013 at 6:23pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, my seven-year-old nephew challenged me to a push up contest in front of my girlfriend. He beat me, and then asked my girlfriend why she's dating a pussy. FML

by BIGCHEIFAAA / 04/24/2013 at 12:55am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I played Call of Duty with my new flatmate. He continuously lost and was outraged that a girl beat him. It resulted in him shouting at me, claiming that since I'm Muslim, I must be part of the Taliban, which would explain my gaming skills. FML

by zahra_786 / 04/11/2013 at 5:11am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on my arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, and I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on my forearm. FML

by maturity / 04/07/2013 at 8:30pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I was at University when a giant mascot started walking in my direction. As they walked past, they whispered my name seductively. I still don't know who it was. FML

by confused / 04/07/2013 at 10:51am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I was at University when a giant mascot started walking in my direction. As they walked past, they whispered my name seductively. I still don't know who it was. FML

by confused / 04/07/2013 at 10:51am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I went out to a restaurant to meet a girl that I met online. When I arrived I texted her and she said she was wearing a blue shirt. The only person that was wearing anything blue was a fat man smiling in the corner. FML

by bobthenun / 03/20/2013 at 5:16pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandma gave me a sex talk. Not the usual one, either. This one was about blowjobs. I had to sit politely as she explained it's something all women have to learn if they want a well-behaved husband, but that it's an "acquired taste". Gag me. FML

by butnotlikethat / 03/15/2013 at 8:05pm / China (Jiangxi) / Intimacy

Today, I was helping my father-in-law out at a family barbecue. Somehow, the topic turned to grand-children, at which point I confessed that my wife has been having trouble conceiving. His response was to boom: "Sure you've been putting it in the right hole, son?!" FML

by um... maybe / 03/12/2013 at 6:43pm / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML

by RedWaters / 03/06/2013 at 3:20pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, a classmate posted a recording of a recent lecture on my university's Facebook page, so we could listen again and take notes at home. A few minutes in, I heard myself asking a question. I then heard snorting and some girl muttering "dumb cunt" under her breath. FML

by DumbCuntApparently / 02/27/2013 at 3:52pm / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was pushing my wheelchair-bound grandpa back home, when a pretty girl walked past us in the opposite direction. He made me stop and turn him around, just so he could ogle her ass as she walked away. FML

by hé merde / 02/22/2013 at 9:27pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom. When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." FML

by Notaplacetogo / 02/17/2013 at 1:45am / United States (California) / Intimacy