Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Sarairwin49

Search for a member

Sarairwin49

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 25 March 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 487
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About Sarairwin49 : 18 years old- i love music- I'm Gothic/rocker- i have a heart of gold.-I'm a great friend, and will listen if anyone needs someone to talk to- I'm short(bout 5'4) - I love to read- I'm a senior in highschool- I'm a small town girl- I spend a lot of time online- I love to cook and try new foods- I'm pro life- love=love - open minded- love making new friends- love learning new languages- adventurous- self-conscious xc- i believe inner beauty is what counts- hard working- I'm taken my the best ~12.11.12~- Feel free to message me!! ( nothing dirty or flirty please!) Thanks!

Sarairwin49's page activity

Visits<b>k_gils</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 3:46pm<b>black_day</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 10:21pm<b>SaveEdit</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 8:42pm<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 3:35pm<b>DHoang22</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 3:49am<b>lurch87</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 10:07am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 7:46am<b>steeler088</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 7:40am<b>okcnation</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 6:33am<b>cohenb93</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 6:03am<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 5:41am<b>firefighterbee</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 2:36am<b>Dark_Zekrom</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 2:55pm<b>Sierra7211</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 3:19pm<b>iDizzzzy</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 1:14am<b>md101</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 4:17pm<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 3:46am<b>Shemp_5</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 8:57pm

Sarairwin49's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of Sarairwin49's badges

Sarairwin49's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my weekly AA meeting. It was a huge crowd and I was the guest speaker. Not 5 minutes into my speech, I was booed off stage and banned from further attendance because I accidentally wore a Jack Daniel's shirt. FML

#21217633
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19837) - you deserved it (46581)

On 07/22/2014 at 7:20pm - health - by dypshyyt - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to make love for the first time. The moment my bra came off, he started hyperventilating to the point of blacking out. So much for that. FML

#21208053
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43066) - you deserved it (4373)

On 07/13/2014 at 4:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Catalonia)

Today, I woke up to my young niece hammering a metal cookie cutter into my leg. I'll have a teddy bear shaped scar for the rest of my life. FML

#21199181
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49191) - you deserved it (4644)

On 07/05/2014 at 1:40am - kids - by umerin - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my two year old puked in the backseat of the car. When we stopped to clean her up, she scooped up the vomit by the handful and threw it at my head. I had an almost two hour drive before I could wash the smell off myself. FML

#21143663
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42851) - you deserved it (4888)

On 05/18/2014 at 3:51am - kids - by WolfieJL (woman) - United States

Today, while at a restaurant with my husband for our 4-year anniversary, he kept behaving strangely, breathing deeply and eventually sighing happily. I thought the wine had just gone to his head. Nope; he proudly admitted later that he'd jerked off without anyone noticing, even me. FML

#21126320
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43470) - you deserved it (4972)

On 04/29/2014 at 2:48pm - misc - by god (woman) - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

Today, after beating myself up for being useless and not being able to do anything right, I managed to choke almost to the point of blacking out, on a piece of lettuce. FML

#21124429
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35773) - you deserved it (5523)

On 04/27/2014 at 3:16pm - misc - by failureatlife - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I opened up a snapchat from my best friend. I received a full and detailed view of her and her boyfriend having sex. All I wanted to know was how her Valentine's Day dinner went. FML

#21060866
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49172) - you deserved it (8603)

On 02/14/2014 at 10:21pm - intimacy - by waymoreiwanted (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I donated blood. Afterwards, I regained consciousness on the floor with a half-eaten cookie in my mouth. FML

Today, after doing vigorous chores all day with my girlfriend, her mom came and paid us each $100. My girlfriend cried and threw a fit because she said they were her chores, so she deserves all the money. FML

#20952303
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46476) - you deserved it (4178)

On 11/10/2013 at 3:03am - love - by Go away - United States (Iowa)

Today, after hours of organizing and spending around $300 for my three-year-old's birthday party, I realized I forgot to send out the invitations. FML

#20951338
159 comments

Today, my uncle gave me a very expensive bottle of champagne at a celebratory family event. We were celebrating me spending 1 year sober. FML

#20951207
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44285) - you deserved it (3136)

On 11/09/2013 at 8:20am - misc - by Falling off the wagon - United Kingdom (Brighton and Hove)

Today, in the lunch line at school, a kid literally ordered a "hamburger with extra swag." FML

#20950369
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43547) - you deserved it (3266)

On 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm - work - by thank god you'll only live once (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked in on my roommate whacking off to clown porn. FML

#20895842
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51244) - you deserved it (6278)

On 09/25/2013 at 5:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, after I explained to my waitress that I have an allergy to butter, she nonetheless put some on my baked potato. When I had her get me another, without butter, she came back with one and then asked if I would like butter with it. FML

#20862628
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44039) - you deserved it (3084)

On 09/01/2013 at 12:40am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

#20861263
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42940) - you deserved it (7327)

On 08/31/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by fartz (woman) - United States



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: