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Sandsh8rk

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Sandsh8rk

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 20 May 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5799
  • Number of comments : 425
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About Sandsh8rk : Oh, hello. You seem to have stumbled across my FML page.

And yes, I know my profile picture perfectly matches my comment.

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Sandsh8rk's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend tried to change her pad while we were sitting in a crowded movie theatre. She succeeded and slipped the used pad into her purse. I can't get rid of the memory, and I don't think I can ever eat popcorn again. FML

#18120358
593 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58624) - you deserved it (4668)

On 10/31/2011 at 11:38am - intimacy - by ohdear (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my elderly neighbor called the police because my cat was in her yard. I now have a citation and a court date. Apparently, there is a leash law for cats in my town, and it is taken very seriously. FML

#18100684
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25566) - you deserved it (5261)

On 10/29/2011 at 12:51am - animals - by Fought The Law - United States (Georgia)

Today, I think my dad has finally lost his shit and is having a mid-life crisis. He showed up at my school and had me brought to the front desk. He told me to get in the car because we were going to have some "father-daughter bonding". This meant us watching Silent Hill with his work buddies. FML

#18095179
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21775) - you deserved it (2155)

On 10/28/2011 at 7:50am - misc - by -__- - Australia (Queensland)

Today, at my job as a produce clerk at a grocery store, I had an entire conversation with my coworker about how nice the new cabbage boxes are. This is all it takes to thrill me these days. FML

#18078433
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21529) - you deserved it (3014)

On 10/26/2011 at 2:36am - work - by insanitycalling - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out the hard way that everyone in my dorm knows I watch My Little Pony. FML

#18047257
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10993) - you deserved it (37488)

On 10/22/2011 at 4:25pm - work - by Brony - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend showed me a YouTube video of him popping a huge blackhead on his forehead. He told me he had been "growing" it for more than 2 years now. I have been caressing and kissing that thing for almost 2 years because I thought it was a beauty mark. FML

#17839150
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31020) - you deserved it (15087)

On 09/26/2011 at 12:58pm - misc - by Yuuucky (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I had a graded performance in my drama class. I had to play a murderer in an interrogation room. I got really into it and started pounding on the windows to try to "escape". The thin glass smashed. Four hours in casualty, stitches and plastic surgery pretty much sum up my mood. FML

#17757780
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21136) - you deserved it (8335)

On 09/16/2011 at 1:18pm - health - by anonymous - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

#17709124
580 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20783) - you deserved it (233792)

On 09/10/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML

#17589386
676 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30121) - you deserved it (49123)

On 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm - kids - by f*ckingdisgusted - United States

Today, I got my tongue pierced, then went to a pet store. A clerk came up to ask if I needed help. I showed him I already had some fish, and said, "No thanks." He must have thought I was "special," as he bent down and in a baby voice, said "You got fishy? FISHY FISHY FISHY!" while poking the bag. FML

#17497586
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24432) - you deserved it (11193)

On 08/17/2011 at 4:13am - misc - by aprilfools22 - United States (California)

Today, I was taking a dump behind a dumpster. I suddenly heard a noise and a vibration against the dumpster. It was a garbage truck lifting it to collect the trash. The garbage men started laughing and took out their phones. FML

#17365713
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9736) - you deserved it (72185)

On 08/04/2011 at 10:35am - misc - by jshi8 - United States (Maryland)

Today, while walking home from work, a young teenage girl ran up behind me and dumped a carton of milk on my head. She said, "The cow master baptizes you!" and then ran in the opposite direction, cackling madly. FML

#17301663
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33516) - you deserved it (3650)

On 07/29/2011 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML

#17283152
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29457) - you deserved it (15390)

On 07/28/2011 at 1:39am - kids - by anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

#17088739
429 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73553) - you deserved it (7674)

On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my 15 year old girlfriend called to tell me she is pregnant. Her dad is ex-military, and makes a point of cleaning his guns every time I go to her house. FML

#17010843
708 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18313) - you deserved it (93718)

On 07/07/2011 at 3:43am - kids - by shit - United States



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